To be daunted at being a single mum again.?

[MediterraneanHouse]

Just found out I’m pregnant yesterday. I’m 29 with a 7 year old. My mum said she’ll help out as much as possible which I’m really grateful for.

The baby is due late September/October.. I’d got down to a Size 8 at Xmas and now I found out I’m pregnant!

I was 22 when I had my daughter and although I had my mum’s support it’s really hard being a single mum. AIBU to feel daunted 2nd time around?

Very friendly terms by the sounds of it.

Good luck to you but please don't kid yourself that the forthcoming child will bring you and ex back together. Band aid babies never work.

Of course it's not wrong, that's why contraception is recommended though,otherwise women would be having babies alot more.

Congratulations @MediterraneanHouse 🥳

Your child has two financially stable parents and a loving family! Ignore the ridiculous comments that this is a bad situation to bring a baby into!

I wish you all the best with your new bundle of joy! ❤️

I'm not a troll, but you do seem far more intent on convincing me that I'm wrong rather than supporting the OP. Obviously I've touched a nerve with you!

Hun, please do not try to gaslight your way out of this, like a man

You came on here, trolling and insulting the op and single mothers

The superiority you feel about being a divorced woman who no-one can tell is a single mum does not make you superior here, unfortunately

I've supported the op, and I've defended her, myself and other single mums against your comments

You have touched a nerve, as I'm sick of society's regression into these silly misogynistic ways. At least on this thread, the op will leave knowing that she is in a lovely situation, and there are women who don't think like you and the weak men who hate women doing things solo

I'm no hun 😂 but you're clearly a man hater. I'm also no troll, just someone with quite high standards. If you think that the OP is in a lovely situation then you and I have very different views in how kids should be brought into the world.

Oh give it a rest @TheSnootiestFox

Have you never heard the phrase ‘if you don’t have anything nice to say…?’

OP has updated the thread to say she’s happy, the dad’s happy, the rest of the family are happy and they’ve got the money to support the child.

Take your grumbling elsewhere 🤣

So have you had a scan yet OP?

What was the actual point of this thread again?

You have extremely low standards if you think taking another woman down is ok or to promote yourself as a more superior "single parent".

Why should you get support from other poor people when you've created this situation for yourself?

I just hope that your baby is brighter than you.

Hmmm. The countrt is going to hell in a handcart because noone us allowed to tell the truth anymore. For those of us that aren't woke 'do as you please and to hell with the consequences' preachers, it's really quite frustrating.

So your mum will help. What about your dad?

Have you had an evening tipple? 🤣

So the country is going to hell because people (like the OP) are having children in happy working families except the parents aren’t together?

Bit extreme…

From what you’ve said, your children have two parents who get on but aren’t together. Just like the OP’s.

Your kids are financially stable with working parents, just like the OP’s.

They have supportive extended family. Just like the OP’s.

I’m genuinely struggling to see what your problem is.

Though she does have her mum for support, wonder if grandmother was part of the conversation for OP to produce another baby? Perhaps MediterraneanHouse can clarify?
Through contacts Im aware of someone in a similar situation to OP. New baby has arrived but having been born early is in hospital 30 miles away. New baby and eldest child have different dads. Eldest child is 5yrs old and staying with his dad who lives with his new partner and her two children by another man. Child in question has only recently met his dads new partner and children. His behaviour is deteriorating. So despite support all round, it denonstrates clearly research which identifies that a child is ideally better supported in a two-parent scenario. If the parents were together the child would be looked qfter in his own home by his dad. Likely only spending some nights with grandparents. However now his dad has shacked up with another woman and her two kids who the child doesnt know, it inevitably contribites to a situation, which whilst no fault of anyones adds another layer of stress to an already stressful situation, for the child.This may well be ameliorated if the dad lived by himself (whilst its not to say he should) his choice to do so has inadvertently impacted his child.

my mum was supportive when I had my daughter - I’d only just turned 22 when I had my my first baby so my mum knew I’d have another baby - when I was 26/27 my daughter was 4/5 and even she thought I’d have a baby!! Am now 29 and finally pregnant 😊

Mg Mum wasn’t part of the conversation about having another baby as such - my ex just came to stay for a few days after Xmas and I got pregnant 😭

I’m not in a relationship with the baby’s Dad but now the news has had time to sink in we’re both really pleased I’m pregnant 😊

And I definitely don’t fit into size 8 jeans any more - I’m.getting used to leggings and a tummy 😭

No, no tipple. I genuinely give up. That comment was less to do with the OP and a reflection on wider society.

However, if you really can't see a difference between having planned pregnancies within a marriage and getting pregnant by accident to different blokes through casual sex, then that says far more about you than it does me.

Please don't do this!. I wouldn't have done this shut happens in life. No one is perfect. She has plenty of support and hopefully the father will remain active.

Well said! Following this logic I should look down on all single mums because I’ve been married 27 years and my 2 DS’s still have a married mum and dad!! But I don’t because, well, shit happens.

I was married to my ex and had twins and I'm in a much worse situation than her. I have no family support and my ex is very hostile so being married is not a guarantee.

@MediterraneanHouse how does your mum feel about having to support you again through this though?. You do need to get a lot more careful from now on.

My mum’s really pleased I’m pregnant 😊
She suspected I was pregnant weeks ago I just thought I had bad indigestion!! My mum won’t be supporting me financially just giving lots of emotional support - she only lives 2 streets away I see her most days. I split from my first daughter’s father when she was only 3 months old - so I’ve been a single mum since I was 22 - my mum’s done so much for me and my daughter - I’m very grateful.

The baby’s Dad only lives 10 mins walk away so see him often as well. I’m really looking forward to having this baby 😊

@femfemlicious

i was in a relationship when I got pregnant with my daughter - but with this pregnancy my ex stayed for a few days after Xmas last year and I fully admit we weren’t “careful”, but I’m pleased that I’m 28 with a 7 year old daughter and I’m having another baby 😊

Anyone who things this is a good situation to bring a baby into is seriously delusional