To be daunted at being a single mum again.?

[MediterraneanHouse]

Just found out I’m pregnant yesterday. I’m 29 with a 7 year old. My mum said she’ll help out as much as possible which I’m really grateful for.

The baby is due late September/October.. I’d got down to a Size 8 at Xmas and now I found out I’m pregnant!

I was 22 when I had my daughter and although I had my mum’s support it’s really hard being a single mum. AIBU to feel daunted 2nd time around?

Have you really told your 7 year old? Why?

And why are you claiming to be daunted when you sound very pleased despite the less than ideal circumstances?

Do you live with your mum?

It must be so lovely to be so perfect…

In my experience, children who experience the trauma of a toxic marriage followed by a messy divorce are more damaged than those born into a stable home with a single parent.

How will you manage your job when the new baby arrives ? Will your ex-partner be financially supporting you ?

No, it's not wrong. But making poor choices and not using the free contraception available in the UK is.

Congratulations OP. You’ll be fine! A lovely little family of 3.

If come off here though some people can be really nasty to single mums and it’s the last thing you need right now!

And you sound lovely! Get off your high horse.

Why come on here to spread hate? It doesn’t matter that you were married. Seriously it really doesn’t. The end result is the same.

No. That's you own feelings about how you are perceived as a single parent. You don't speak for us all and obviously you also didn't make the best choices but in your defence no one gets married thinking they will be a single parent.

No there really isn't.

Wow. You could just say congratulations. As I will: congratulations.

The OP sounds very blasé about the whole thing.

What do you want her to be? Remorseful she had sex? In confessional? In a nunnary? Let's remember it takes two to have sex, sometimes relationships fail, nobody is perfect and she's looking forward to her new baby. This judgemental bile is vile. She's excited she's having a baby. So what it's not in a two-parent family. Congratulations!

And what would I be congratulating? A woman who is more concerned about her dress size than the fact she's conceived a child through casual sex?

Of course there is. The fact that you can't see that is ridiculous.

It really isn't. Absolutely categorically not!

NOT CASUAL SEX.

Can someone call the village elders

I don’t think it’s the sex, it’s the having children outside a stable relationship and your main concern being your size. Honestly I’m with PP, people need to have children as intentionally as possible imo. I don’t care if that makes me sound judgemental, the impact is on the children themselves.

No. You’re ridiculous for actually putting single mums in to categories without seeing the irony of your own post. Nobody in my life has asked or judged me for being a single parent or asked how I got there. I was married to my daughter’s father but that doesn’t put me above other single mums.

I always feel single mothers are the one thing people believe they are still allowed to be disgustingly rude about.
The amount of women on the site who stay with awful men “for the children” because they thing being a single mother is such a terrible fate is the truly shameful thing.
Best of luck to you and your family OP

Give over, the dress size is plainly an aside - "oh I just got into my size eight jeans". A jokey comment. She's nowhere said she's legitimately furious, you'd be mad to think she actually was. Actually she's said she's daunted, wants the baby, has the support of her family and is on good terms with the baby's father.

Oh God. You really don't get it, do you?

What is there to get?

Really? You can't see the difference? Wow.

That if you're going to shag someone that you're not in a relationship with, getting pregnant, especially when you already have a young child by a different man, is less than ideal. I can't believe that I'm having to spell that out to adults!