DSis threatening to destroy my family with secret recording what do I do?

[InsufficantLizard]

NC for this because it’s beyond messy, and I feel sick even typing it.

Long story short, DSis and I have always had a strained relationship, but we were civil for the sake of DM. Well, that’s out the window now. She’s been holding onto a secret recording of me saying something (out of context, obviously) that could genuinely ruin my marriage and family life if it got out. She’s now threatening to send it to DH and possibly others unless I do what she wants (not going into details, but it’s completely unreasonable).

I feel like I’m in a nightmare. DH would be absolutely gutted if he heard it, even though I swear it’s not what it sounds like. I don’t know whether to try and reason with her (unlikely to work), preemptively tell DH (but risk blowing everything up myself), or just wait and see if she actually does it.

For context, DSis has always been a bit of a drama queen, but this is next level. I just don’t understand how my own sister could be so cruel.

What would you do? Anyone been in a similar situation? Handhold needed, please. I feel sick. 😞

Depends what it is really.

Without context, best advice is to talk to DH first about it.

I think you're just going to have to explain that she's blackmailing you, give the contact behind it, and then take whatever consequences there are.

If you allow her to blackmail you once, it won't stop.

I’d just front it out and say she’d used AI to create the recording if it came to it.

Tell him. This sounds like a nightmare.

I'd give my sister what she wanted even if it was unreasonable, but that's me. I'd rather avoid upsetting my family.

I think if you give in the demands will increase. It also looks guilty if you give in. I would talk to DH and give him the proper context. Even if it's not pretty. He can make his own decision whether to trust you or your sister. You can ask him if he wants to get exactly what's said or just trust you that she's taken it out of context. Why on earth was she recording you anyway?

You need to come clean. She has power at the moment moment but if you come clean, she won't.

Best option is to tell him first I think, or you'll always have it hanging over you. Then go no contact with this toxic madam.

I'm struggling to imagine what could sound sound so bad out of context but if what you say is correct and you explain the context to your DH surely that would sort it? Your sister is evil though.

Tell your husband what you said and the full context of the conversation
take away her power

Absolutely this. It will come out eventually anyway, so better you get in first and give the proper context.

Let her blackmail you once, she'll do it again!

Tell him and completely take the power away from her. How did she manage to record you saying anything. The absolute sneaky wench

Totally depends what it is. You confessing to an affair or to stealing money off him is worse than saying DH has a silly haircut.

Way to bow down to bullies and bribery

I'd call the police on her. They might retrieve the evidence.

I’d tell your DH and I’d go to the police. She is blackmailing you. That’s a criminal offence. She wants to blow up your family - you need to strike first.

Giving into blackmail is never a good solution. It's likely to just keep repeating with future events.

I would let Dsis know that unless she deletes it you will do something equally disruptive to her life. Mutually assured destruction basically. I definitely wouldn't let it become a tool she has to control you.

Speak to the police. Blackmail is an offence.. Your relationship with her is over anyway
And tell dh your version... Today. Then tell dsis to get to fuck.

Talk to your husband explain what your sister is threatening and tell your sister to go ahead
It's the only way to rid yourself of her. Then cut yourself off completely from her

Save all messages she's sent and record all calls!

If your DH is a reasonable man then I'd explain the situation, give him the full context, and let him know your DS is trying to blackmail you by threatening to misrepresent the conversation to him.

Come clean tell your husband. Take her power away.

There’s only one way to stop her and that’s to come clean. Make sure you keep any messages that prove she is blackmailing you. Or record the conversations. Either way, you have to take away the power she has over you, or she will do it again and again and again.

Get a recording of her blackmail
Then tell her if she follows through you will use it to prove blackmail and go to the police.