Neighbour asking for money

[Redbird3]

It all started a few months ago. Next door neighbour messaged me on Facebook and asked if I could bank transfer her £10 and she would knock on with the cash. I get on with her so I said yes.

Ever since it’s got to the point that she is asking every day. If not every day then every other day. I have started to say no as I do feel like she is taking advantage. When I don’t reply she then messages DH. There’s been times where DH has transferred her money on the promise that she’ll come round with it asap but it’s been next day.

Last night around midnight she messaged me asking for £20. I was just getting in bed so I didn’t reply. She messaged again around 12:20 as I was dropping off to sleep which woke me up. Then around 12:30 she called me on Facebook.

I think it’s getting a joke now but DH disagrees and doesn’t see the problem. A couple of nights ago she messaged DH, he sent her £10, then she messaged again for £20 which he sent her, then again 10 minutes later asking for another £10!

AIBU in thinking this is just pure cheek?

I think she's best ignored. What a CF. Why does she think you should give her money?

Yes, obviously. Just say no or dont reply to her messages.

She thinks you're her personal banker. I'd tell her you've not got enough, or just a straight you're not doing it anymore.

It sounds to me like a gambling problem? Maybe just say something along the lines of.. I’m always happy to help however since it’s becoming a regular thing I’d like to know what it is I’m helping you with? It’s a little concerning that you’ve messaged multiple times in one day for different amounts.

This is good I think.

Has she actually paid any of it back? Have you worked out just how much you are giving her. Sounds like she's gambling on her phone

I am really confused. Is she coming round with the money on the same day? If that is the case and has the money in cash to give you then why is she asking you to transfer it?

Sorry cross post @LucyLou0527

‘No. I won’t be lending you any money. Please do not ask me again.’ If she does block her.

Start doing the same back. Every day request a tenner.

This sounds like really low level money laundering. But given the values involved, it doesn't seem big enough for money laundering.

Why on earth didn't you text back when she sent the late message and say not at this time of night, you've woken us up! Then next morning, text again and say 'Sorry neighbour, but I feel like you're taking the piss now, and this has to stop.'

This also sounds like money laundering to me! I'd put a stop to it if I were you.

Rather than wait for the next time she asks - tell her up front - no more money. I'm finding it hard to think of things you would need money for urgently at home at 12.30am - other than on line betting.

Oh get your DH on board sharpish too

Sounds like a druggie, any strange comings and goings at her house?

Turn your phone off at night so you don't get woken up. Also agree sounds like she has a gambling problem. Say no from now on. She is being a CF

Sounds like gambling or drugs. Is she paying you back? Regardless, it’s becoming a nuisance and you are well within your rights to cut her off. Tell her that you will no longer be able to give her money. She is probably doing this with other people too. By the time you get you asking neighbours for money you have already exhausted family and friends. Make your DH aware of your concerns and agree that the money train stops now.

Definitely message her what @LucyLou0527 has written. It's straight to the point while not being rude.

It needs nipped in the bud. The fact u or more so ur DH is just giving it no questions asked thats why the requests are coming faster and stronger. She sees u as her cash machine.

There was once when she should have posted £20 but there was only £10. I was really angry but DH brushed it of as he’s too nice IMO! She said she could have dropped it on the path or something🧐

She smokes weed a lot as I can always smell it😡 so I’m not sure if it’s something to do with that

I agree with pp that the amounts sound too low for money laundering, but the risk of your bank completely freezing your account (and I believe they have to, by law, if they identify any activity as suspicious) would be enough for me to not do this again.

😭😭 how has it gotten this far op! You're only being unreasonable if you don't tell her you're absolutely not transferring her any money ever again as she's taken advantage of your good will.

Is the cash she gives you real? I'd assume it's fake

As pp have said, tell her no. Your husband is being weird? Id tell him not out of our joint account, and keep an eye for suspicious behaviour from him. x

Yes I didn;t understand this either. Why does she borrow money only to give it back to you same day

Hmmm your DH seems strangely accommodating...

are they close?

it is extraordinary that you complied with her ludicrous demands once, never mind twice, @Redbird3

you really, really need to work on your boundaries

It's quite possible she's dealing

£10 & £20 are common amounts for people to buy personal amounts of drugs

Ask her why she can't just pay the money into her bank?

I’d send her a message right now saying you’re not able to do this anymore. If you need an excuse just say you don’t want cash lying around.

There must be something dodgy going on here. Why does she have cash but presumably nothing in her bank account. Why can’t she pay her own cash into her own account? I’d be worried I was unwittingly getting into something illegal.