To say that living alone is better than sharing a home with anyone?

[MintZebra]

Even the best relationships or friendships don’t compare to the peace of living by yourself. AIBU to think solo living is the ultimate goal?

I was happy living alone but I do prefer life now living with my partner and children. We’re very laid back though, get on well and have lots of space to get peace and time alone when we want it.

I love my husband, but I wish we had separate houses.

I hate someone else's stuff being in my eye line. And the endless crumbs on the kitchen counters.

For me - other people annoy me. I don’t want to be spoken to in the morning nor when I get home. I don’t want somebody in my space when don’t want them there - don’t want to make room for them in my sofa or in my bed and don’t want to compromise on anything!

I love living with DH (despite his bloody clutter - his overall loveliness makes me turn a blind eye), but living with ANY OTHER PERSON? No, absolutely not.

🤣🤣

Lol no, my husband does all the chores I hate doing, I haven't washed a dish in eight years.

I lived alone for years but I prefer it with DP.

If you have lots of other friends/family then it would be fine but having neither AND living alone is too much.

When my husband works away and there are no kids here, I love it for 2 days. After that, I’m bored and really lonely.

Myself and my husband have separate houses. It works for us.

Yeah it’s great but I do worry what happens to my dog if I die in the night and no one finds me for weeks.

It has its pros and cons:

Pros
Not having to tiptoe around anyone
Can watch what you like
Don't have to compromise
It's your own mess
Complete decoration freedom
Can get up/go to bed when you like

Cons
No one to help when you're ill
No one to wake up to or share your day with
No one to cook for you
No one to share bills or chores

I agree OP. I'm late 50s now and have lived with three partners. I MUCH prefer living on my own and never get lonely. I've lived alone for 25 years now.

The problem is the compromises you have to make. When to get up, what to eat, what radio station / music you listen to, what TV shows/films you watch. Decor and garden choices. Visitors to the house (who and how often, appointments or 'poppers-in' - shudder). When you go to bed, the heat in the house, smoking or non-smoking, friends, other people's families. Where you go, what you do, holidays.

The list is endless and if you're not careful, you can end up living someone else's life - taking the step kids to soft play, going to centre parks, watching the rugby or football, spending all your time in the pub or walking someone else's dog.

i appreciate that the idea is to share your life with someone but it always seems to be women who compromise.

I lived with my daughter for 25 years until she moved out - which I was dreading - although I wouldn't have told her that. I very quickly loved living alone and a couple of years on, it's lovely when she comes back for the weekend but I'm also happy to be on my own again. I will never live with anyone again (unless she needed to, obviously).

100% - I’d never lived alone until 3 years ago (I’m 59) and now I can’t imagine ever living with another person again.

I’m very social, love seeing people outside of the home but nothing better than coming to my empty flat and soaking up the peace.

I can’t imagine coming home after a day at work and having to have a conversation with someone.

Love living alone...well, just me & my dog. I have an OH of nearly 15 years. We lived together for a few of those but it works better this way. The only thing against it is the cost of running a place on one income. Currently having my shower room renovated with pink tiles, which I can’t imagine my OH would let me do if we lived together (& he had a say)!

Totally agree with this. Love seeing my friends and family but the thought of coming home from work and someone trying to have a conversation with me is a big no.

I loved with other people for 56 year of my life and I’m enjoying the peace now.

I've lived alone for many years, before and after marriage, and I love it - and I mean really alone, no children. I will never share my home with anyone ever again.

I lived alone with DD for 17 years, then she went off to university and it was awful for a week but I soon loved it just being me and the cat. I've been with my DP for nine years but I have no intention of ever living with him. I love my own space (on the sofa, in bed, in the bathroom) far too much.

Pretty much this. I lived alone, then with my kids, then alone again. When I married, in my late 40s, my husband worked away, always Monday-Friday, often for longer. He retired a few years before me, and that was quite annoying, and now I’m retired too, and I’m going insane with almost always having someone around.
I keep doing the maths to see if we could afford two places, but I could guarantee that, even if we could, he’d be at my place every hour god sends.

After 5 years single the thing that really puts me off meeting someone is the thought of having to share my bed again.

I love sleeping diagonally without anyone else in my space. I think I’d begrudge anyone else invading my cozy bed 🤣

That was my worry too, with my cats, and now they've all gone so I don't have to think about. I do know what you mean, it used to prey on my mind.

I've lived alone and enjoyed it for what it was at the time.

I now live with my DC's and get time to myself when they're at their Dad's so best of both worlds, as I mostly like being around people a bit, but not always lol

I don’t think I’ll ever not love sprawling in my double bed at night. Or waking up in it to my cat’s purrs.

I was in quite an abusive marriage 20 years ago. Been living on my own ever since. I can’t describe how much the peace and quiet and autonomy benefits my mental health. Recently I got a little cat. I am happy in my lovely space.

Depends on your relationship. DH makes my life easier. Coming home to a bath, glass of wine and a rest followed by dinner being ready after a rough day. I can totally understand that being alone is better than being with someone but being with the right person is nice.