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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think my mum over reacted. Photo attached

294 replies

Lou989 · 07/02/2025 17:30

I was washing my hands at my mums, a bit of water went on the stainless steel bit where the pots dry. She got annoyed saying she’d spent time doing it today. It was only a bit of water. So threw. A piece of cutlery at my hands whilst they were still under the tap and said I was selfish. Haven’t done anything wrong I don’t feel

Sensitive content
To think my mum over reacted. Photo attached
OP posts:
Original poster
Lou989 · 07/02/2025 17:31

Photo won’t upload atm but I have a slightly bigger than a 20p size wound and it’s very red and now bleeding

OP posts:
NameChange101xox · 07/02/2025 17:32

No that isn’t normal. Do you need the hospital? Was it a knife?

NameChange101xox · 07/02/2025 17:32

Photo has loaded now. It looks sore. Has she hurt you before?

TemporaryPosition · 07/02/2025 17:32

Oh OP I don't need to see a photo to know if she hurt you that's absolutely not OK. How old are you, do you live together? Is this normal for her? Did she know she hurt you and how did she respond.

Hugs OP, you know this isn't good. Nobody deserves that. You didn't do wrong

Original poster
Lou989 · 07/02/2025 17:33

NameChange101xox · 07/02/2025 17:32

Photo has loaded now. It looks sore. Has she hurt you before?

She has slapped me in the past over a minor thing, think it was last year, late 20s, not a child btw.

OP posts:
Iamallowedtodisagreewithyou · 07/02/2025 17:33

You did nothing to deserve that. I wouldn't be spending time with anyone who did this to me.

Original poster
Lou989 · 07/02/2025 17:34

She’s trying to play it down saying she meant to throw it in the sink but that’s not true as she threw it directly at my hand and she knew my hand was there

OP posts:
Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 07/02/2025 17:35

Do you live there? If so, move out asap

AllProperTeaIsTheft · 07/02/2025 17:36

She sounds like a psycho, frankly. Who on earth reacts like that over a bit of water?!

HebeHerbivore · 07/02/2025 17:37

She actually slapped you? She sounds like a nutcase.

HolyPeaches · 07/02/2025 17:37

Of course you didn’t do anything wrong by a bit of water splashing whilst washing your hands.

Was she abusive to you during childhood?
How old is she?
Does she have mental health problems?

RickiRaccoon · 07/02/2025 17:38

She sounds unhinged -- and violent. I like to keep the sink dry and clean and a tiny bit of water on the metal part would not upset me in the least. She must've been looking for something to go off about. I'd rethink being in her house or alone with her.

diddl · 07/02/2025 17:55

It wouldn't matter if Op had done something to deserve it!

Isn't that what abusers say?
"You made me slap you/throw something at you that cut you".

Honestly Op do you think it would have been Ok if you felt that you had done something wrong?

There's a simple answer to that-no, it still wouldn't have been OK!

Georgyporky · 07/02/2025 17:56

Did you retaliate when she slapped you?

If you let her get away with it, she'll probably carry on.

(I'd have punched her lights out.)

WonderingWanda · 07/02/2025 17:59

Her behaviour is unacceptable. Do you live with her? If not then that would absolutely be the last time I'd visit and I'd tell her that if she ever treated me that way again then we'd be done. If you life with her then I would suggest leaving but also tell her that it's totally out of line and you won't be tolerating it any more.

SunshineAndFizz · 07/02/2025 18:01

That's awful OP. And definitely not okay!

SecondMrsTanqueray · 07/02/2025 18:03

She sounds mental. I’d be giving her a wide berth.

Pillarsofsalt · 07/02/2025 18:03

I hope you are in a position to keep your distance from your mum until she accesses help for her temper.

WhereYouLeftIt · 07/02/2025 18:03

Since you phrased it "I was washing my hands at my mums" I'm going to assume you don't live with her - thank goodness!

I would be telling her she needs to apologise, and I won't be coming round until she has. I suspect she's the type who would refuse to apologise, which is great because then you never have to submit yourself to her abuse again.

Seriously - she's abusive. Slapping you, throwing metal object at you so that you sustain an injury - abusive. She sounds frankly unhinged. And going from slapping to throwing cutlery at you - she's escalating. Next time it will be worse. Don't let there be a next time.

SecondMrsTanqueray · 07/02/2025 18:05

Georgyporky · 07/02/2025 17:56

Did you retaliate when she slapped you?

If you let her get away with it, she'll probably carry on.

(I'd have punched her lights out.)

Lovely solution. Presumably the OP is not a thug prone to brawling.

BreezyScroller · 07/02/2025 18:10

That's not an over-reaction, that is abuse I am afraid.

Unless it was a genuine accident, or self-defense, it's NEVER acceptable to hurt/injure someone! Especially not your own child!

If a teacher was doing that to you, he would get into all kind of troubles. This is the same.

I wish I could help you, but at least know it's not normal or acceptable.

mathanxiety · 07/02/2025 18:12

Do you live with her?

Is there somewhere safe you can go?

Would you be willing to call the police?

LuckyPeonies · 07/02/2025 18:14

NOT normal. I would advise her she is cut off until she seeks anger mgmt. counseling.

DuckbilledSplatterPuff · 07/02/2025 18:55

Im so sorry you had to go through that, it must be really upsetting.
If you are late 20s, and from what you said earlier, it doesn't sound like you live there, leave right now and stay away from her.
She is abusive.
You could go to a walk in centre and get them to look at the wound and tell them what happened. I would report this. You were simply washing your hands. It would have been easy to wipe up any water off the floor. She was looking for a reason to hurt you and that is not on.
Just because she's your mother, you don't have to put up with this nasty behaviour.

ForestFox44 · 07/02/2025 18:58

Wtf no not normal at all

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