talk me down from being furious!

[furiousnana]

name changed.. but at this point i don't care if anyone knows who i am, i'm that furious at the moment and need talking down. I suffer with anxiety over germs etc.

have just picked up SS's for a road trip to be informed that one of them is off work at the moment with an infectious blood infection, he's admitted that he's probably caught it by not washing his hands properly however assures me that it can only be passed on by consuming his poo!!

he has known that he has this infection for atleast 4 days, he can't remember the name of whatever it is it's called.

AIBU in a couple of things... 1. he could have told me/us before we picked him up so that I could have done my goggling and perhaps been ok with him being in the car, and 2. we are due to have his child next weekend for a sleep over, of which he's been at home with now all week.

i'm so furious right now and not really thinking straight! I have 2 grown up DD's both with serious heart conditions, and 1 is currently pregnant!

AIBU in cancelling the sleep over plans
YANBU?

Poo is brown because of all the red blood cells in it.

That's bollocks. The colour comes from bile. That's why you get white stool with obstructive jaundice.

Yes, and what is bile made from?

• Bilirubin: A breakdown product of red blood cells, bilirubin is the main pigment in bile.

Water, bile acids, bilirubin, cholesterol, phospholipids, electrolytes... I presume your argument is that bilirubin is derived from haemoglobin from broken down blood cells, but the red blood cells never enter the gall bladder. If you have red blood cells in your poo it is a worrying problem. That's what the FIT test checks for, and if positive for even microscopic amounts buys a colonoscopy in an older adult.

Are you labouring under the misapprehension that the RBCs go to the gall bladder to be broken down? They break down in the blood stream. The RBCs never enter the gall bladder.

@DearDenimEagle As PPs have said, shigella can sometimes cross into the blood stream. The presence of viable bacteria in the blood is called bacteraemia. Normally, your immune system deals with it with no symptoms or mild symptoms like fever. It doesn’t necessarily progress to septicaemia (I think a PP suggested that he would have sepsis if he had shigella in his blood).

I suppose it might be theoretically possible he caught it from blood but it’s not a known mode of transmission. I would think it more likely that he caught it by one of the known methods of transmission touching the patient’s hand when he grabbed his arm, touching things the patient had touched when caring for them or the loo handle/taps, or he caught it from a colleague who caught it from the patient etc. You can’t really know because there are so many different ways that the 7 members of staff could have been infected.

I would guess that he is assuming he caught it from the blood because he “saw” the blood and you can’t see bacteria, so he is putting 2 + 2 together and making 5, ditto that is why he thinks shigella is a “blood infection”.

OP, I would point out to him that if “medical professionals” have a protocol that requires 2 clear tests before he returns to work to prevent him infecting vulnerable patients, why does he feel he shouldn’t protect the vulnerable members of his family in the same?

TBF, if he actually were a “medical professional” he could probably make a good argument as to why there is only a very low risk after 1 clear test and it is far easier to take measures to prevent transmission at home but he probably won’t be able to do that… As much as that is true, I wouldn’t want to take the very small risk to my vulnerable family members for the sake of a day out. That’s pretty selfish and even more selfish to decide to take the risk for them by not telling you up front rather than letting you/them make that choice.

I really wouldn’t be concerned about catching shigella from him after giving him a lift, OP, so don’t stress. I would be very angry with him though.

i can confirm he has an actual diagnosis. he had to go onto his NHS medical records to give the name to his dad. I am the one who googled what it is. I agree with hand washing and all personal hygiene, sadly SS insists that he caught it from the patients bleeding arm, and by his own admission, i didn't wash my hands properly (which i do not doubt as he's a scruffy thing).

i'm actually now not worried. i was, but only because he had not furnished us with the facts, but now, i'm all good.

it's turned into a bigger thing now! the illness is not the issue, he's now furious that we have asked so many questions about it, and that he's had to give us the full proper story, his GF has got involved and they have completely ignored the actuall issue and have gone off on a tangent which is pretty normal behaviour for them.

I work in public health. It's fairly common

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