talk me down from being furious!

[furiousnana]

name changed.. but at this point i don't care if anyone knows who i am, i'm that furious at the moment and need talking down. I suffer with anxiety over germs etc.

have just picked up SS's for a road trip to be informed that one of them is off work at the moment with an infectious blood infection, he's admitted that he's probably caught it by not washing his hands properly however assures me that it can only be passed on by consuming his poo!!

he has known that he has this infection for atleast 4 days, he can't remember the name of whatever it is it's called.

AIBU in a couple of things... 1. he could have told me/us before we picked him up so that I could have done my goggling and perhaps been ok with him being in the car, and 2. we are due to have his child next weekend for a sleep over, of which he's been at home with now all week.

i'm so furious right now and not really thinking straight! I have 2 grown up DD's both with serious heart conditions, and 1 is currently pregnant!

AIBU in cancelling the sleep over plans
YANBU?

honestly... this is the story he has just told me and DH when we picked him up! when i pushed for a name (cos DH is still with him) he replied with the word Shigella not shingles!!)

"works for the NHS" could mean he's employed by the post room.

If he is a HCP did he buy his qualifications from the internet? Because he doesn't sound much of a professional.

he's a HCA? band 3! and i questioned why he was touching someones bloody arm without gloves and he said he wa giving out lunches and someone showed him their arm which was bleeding so he grabbed it to stem the flow and that 6 other staff came to help!

i really am hoping this is a wind up, he has been known to tell tall tales in the past, but surely even this is too far fetched to make up?

It's a bit of a poor joke if it is a wind up.

I wouldn't go near him if he does have this and your DH should leave him be too. Definitely cancel the sleepover. Symptoms can apparently last for weeks. Does the child have it too? I think it can take several days from infection for symptoms to present, so don't feel obliged to have the child at yours if you feel unsafe.

It all sounds very peculiar 😳

no idea if the child has it or not. to be honest he wouldn't tell us anyway, always sending child for sleepovers when poorly and telling us litterally as they drop him off where we have no choice but to let him stay!

he's clearly not bothered, and his partner is currently out with the child meeting friends today and they have plans to meet elderly great grandparents tomorrow?

am i over-reacting? or are they just oblivious and selfish?

i know! i honestly don't know if he is winding us up? he could have told us at any point in the past 4 days when he alledges to have known since, yet chose to wait until he was sat in my car!

i can only assume he never told us before this because he knew full well i would have questions and i would most certainly NOT be taking him anywhere!!

It's your husband's child. You can't just not look after your child because they are sick and you don't like germs. What if his Mum was also a germaphobe?

Well, either he has remarkably poor taste in pranks, or his personal and professional hygiene is extremely poor. Either way, he's not someone I'd particularly want to be around, whether or not he has dysentery.

why is everyone arguing about what's wrong with the boy? Why does he have to stay with OP?! I wouldn't like it either, surely other arrangements can be made! Even if he had bloody chickenpox you'd not want him to pass it on and it appears he is an adult so why can't he stay at his usual place of residence until he is better?

Where is all this going, the person who is sick might be young but he works in the NHS so he can't be a child?!

He's an adult.

its my Step Son who is 30 years old! who is apprently ill and we are due to have HIS child for a sleep over at the weekend?

Oh right, misunderstood the post. Personally, I'd just supervise him closely to make sure he's washing his hands.

It doesn't take 7 staff to stop an arm bleeding, what sort of wound was it, surely the patient would have been in isolation too. We're nine of them wearing gloves either, it sounds really odd. I'd be ringing the ward and asking their advice.

It doesn't matter if he's the Pope. It's basic manners and common sense to let others know if you have an infectious illness before you go to stay at theirs/get in their car/embark on a road trip.
Her step son should know better.

GC is 1 year old.... not sure hand washing is a thing yet!

Well then.

So how did he get it then if it's only passed on by faeces, not blood.

At nursery they teach them to wash their hands before and after eating and after going outside from as soon as they can walk to the sink, but obviously they help them do it. It's up to you if you have him or not but in your situation I wouldn't miss out on time with my GC, just keep a bottle of antibacterial hand sanitiser on me when out and make sure everyone's hands are scrupulously clean after nappy changes and before preparing food.

adult SS has a day out planned with his dad today, i picked them up and took them to where they need to be and i am supposed to pick up and drop back home. he dropped his bombshell when he got into the car.

we are due to have his son (our GC) at the weekend. it is unknown if GC does or does not have the 'infection' for want of a better term.

given that we are getting on in years, have another younger baby visit the house and a pregnant DD visiting, i just need to know if i am over-reacting in saying NO to the GC's sleepover on this occasion?

by his own admission, he says 'he can't have washed his hands properly'.. i asked this question!

This.

You are not over-reacting. Don't have the GC, don't put your daughters at risk.