talk me down from being furious!

[furiousnana]

name changed.. but at this point i don't care if anyone knows who i am, i'm that furious at the moment and need talking down. I suffer with anxiety over germs etc.

have just picked up SS's for a road trip to be informed that one of them is off work at the moment with an infectious blood infection, he's admitted that he's probably caught it by not washing his hands properly however assures me that it can only be passed on by consuming his poo!!

he has known that he has this infection for atleast 4 days, he can't remember the name of whatever it is it's called.

AIBU in a couple of things... 1. he could have told me/us before we picked him up so that I could have done my goggling and perhaps been ok with him being in the car, and 2. we are due to have his child next weekend for a sleep over, of which he's been at home with now all week.

i'm so furious right now and not really thinking straight! I have 2 grown up DD's both with serious heart conditions, and 1 is currently pregnant!

AIBU in cancelling the sleep over plans
YANBU?

because he called his dad in tears a few years ago as the male in question threatened to tell his family if he himself did not do so! trust me thats a whole other thread! his fiance decided to forgive him and hey presto they now have a baby!

i agree, its going down rabbit holes even i did not think possible!

A baby and no sex life that you just happened to know about too. Nah. Reported.

Why can't they make their own travel arrangements, it's daft to pick them up, he, if this is even real, should be at home, if he's too sick to work with an notifiable illness he shouldn't be going out,

This is scandalous the more you post the more it sounds like an episode of Hollyoaks.

OP, as to what to do next: I think you need a serious talk with your DH about what you are and are not prepared to do for your SS and his family. If he's taking the piss in various ways, you don't have to offer childcare or lifts. If your DH wants to continue having them at your home, perhaps you should consider going out and leaving it to him?
You could call SS's bluff this time and say you can't babysit in case your GC is carrying a dangerous illness.

Ah so this is a “the gays get dysentery” thread.

Sorry to go off topic a bit, but the NHS should be able to offer you psychological therapy for your anxiety. You may be too ‘complex’ for primary care but certainly not secondary care. I would query this and push for a referral, if you did want any therapy.

Do you really want this tale telling loon in your life OP? I think I would be taking a very big swerve of this lads company in the future by seeing this as a tipping point.

This is just priceless - the dirty sod probably has HepB or suchlike and SHE has to be TREATED FOR his dirtiness by having gem anxiety counselling.
I love MN!
I love MN!
I love MN!

Hep A, hep B more blood-borne

Well as gay men are more likely to have anal sex then it’s cause and effect.

It’s not gay bashing it’s public health information.

It's a mumsnet thread not an NHS waiting room leaflet

How can you think you are over reacting? Drop him home and say you're sorry he isn't well enough to join you and that he will have to make other babysitting arrangements for his children as you cannot risk having them either.

Is he actually ill? He is out for the day so he is presumably not incapacitated. Is it possible that he is exaggerating and actually he and his co workers were potentially exposed and are awaiting test results?

What is/are SS?

Agree with this solution.
Not sure why people would carry on regardless and potentially end up infected , , have to go on antibiotics ( affecting immunity ) and change other plans to avoid infecting others.
Thats such a hassle….just cancel stuff for now OP

Step son in this case. (Social services in others)

Of course it is!
Even young children need to have their hands washed before eating!

Your husbands son is telling you rubbish, and he needs reporting for spreading misinformation around

Thank you! I thought I knew my way around MN but this confused me!

There’s so much weird with this story. Firstly shigella is a GI tract infection- if it’s reached blood stream levels the patient must have been extremely unwell/ and now he’s apparently cut his arm to an extent everyone has to use their hands to stem the bacterial filled blood pouring out of it……Secondly if you SS contracted it (and it would be in his GI tract) then he would be glued to the toilet not out and about doing whatever it is he has been today.

Hmmmm, tall tales from your SS. I think it's more likely he's been playing away with another male 😱

Then she probably wouldn't of had children. Of course op has every right to not care for this child and it might teach dss the consequences of talking shit.

6 other staff would not be off if this were the case?

They could be if they caught it from him at work through poor hygiene rather than sexual transmission.

Something doesn’t add up with his story. I would guess he is either lying about how he caught it because it is embarrassing or he is telling the truth but didn’t understand the medical advice he was given and is confused about how he was infected ie he is assuming it was from the blood whereas it would be more likely he caught it via the usual mode of faecal-oral transmission.

I wouldn’t worry. 🤷‍♀️

Shigella can cause bacteria to break though from the gut into the blood stream, or allow other bacteria to do so - it affects around 7% of people in this way. And if SS is four days in, the symptoms would be subsiding by now, so he wouldn’t necessarily be glued to the loo. With antibiotics it takes about a week to recover. It should be noted though that Shigella is a notifiable disease and patients should be isolating until they are not contagious.