Friends DC & OnlyFans

[Clorrien]

I’m feeling really conflicted and unsure what to do.
A few days ago DD (20) and I had a conversation about the likes of BonnieBlue and Lily Phillips. Mostly talking about how exploitative the porn industry is.
Anyway during the conversation she told me, someone we know has a “popular” onlyfans account. She then went on to tell me it is the daughter of one of my closest friends. The girl in question is 22. DD says she only knows as there is a link in one of her social media bios and a few of them who know her have spoken about it. I’m shocked tbh, this girl is beautiful, extremely intelligent (she got a full ride scholarship for a top US uni), and always seemed very well adjusted. Her family are very normal as well, parents very loving, not bad off financially so she has never wanted for anything. Apparently she uses a pseudonym but that seems beside the point.

Anyway, this girls mum and I talk most days and I’m finding it hard to not tell her, I doubt she knows and if it were my DD I’d want to know so I could protect her.

WIBU to tell my friend? Or is it none of my business.

I think this is different. Society shifts and changes and young people have been so overexposed to sexualised content with women willing to put themselves out there on these sites ten a penny in an oversaturated market and the culture is moving on accordingly if you speak to older teenagers. They don’t rate it.

There is a certain type of person who will always be dismissive of women regardless and I say that as a blonde, conventionally attractive woman who used to get those type of comments before the world moved on and made them unacceptable to voice in the workplace. The attitude I’m talking about is coming from their peers and it’s more of a value judgement about their choices and decisions rather than a comment on their looks. Different thing.

There’s absolutely nothing ‘dated’ about not wanting your adult daughter to earn money by selling her body.

I have to say, I am surprised by how pro OF Mumsnet seems to be... I was still being an absolute idiot when I was 22, and def needed advice from my mum. People can bang on as much as they want about how empowering and fantastic OF is, but these women are putting stuff out on the internet that they may regret one day.

She's obviously doing it for the money then, which is her choice.

People aren't pro-OF. They're anti-judging-women and anti-slut-shaming.

You're entirely missing the point. The point is that, sure, you can slap up photographs/film of yourself on OF, but you have absolutely no control over who sees it. You might be totally ok with lots of grim men salivating over you, but you also have to deal with everyone else's (including @Clorrien and her kids) views on it all too. It doesn't just exist in some OF bubble. It's everywhere forever. You can't say it's "none of your business" because absolutely everyone can make it their business if they fancy.

Yeah really. She’s an adult, she rents her own flat, pays her own bills. If she wanted to pay for it that way, what exactly could I do to stop her? She’d probably tell me to mind my own business anyway. And I’d rather not think of her getting up to that kind of thing online. If I was on onlyfans there is no way I’d want my family to know, and I’d resent them if they attempted to stop me or give me a lecture about online safety.

There are definitely several people on this thread who think OF is absolutely lovely and happy and there won't be any tragic consequences.

Of course you should tell your friend that her daughter could be at risk, could be vulnerable, could be in a distressed state if mind. Only Fans isn’t a reflection of a happy adjusted mentally healthy person

Exactly this. Funny how posters who claim to support other women only want to do so if she is making money in a way they deem acceptable.

On another note, I wouldn't believe the claims of massive earnings. My understanding is it works like a pyramid scheme /MLM , so just like with Younique, forever living etc there is a real incentive to make outlandish claims about how much you earn in order to recruit new people and earn commission from them

That’s not how OF works 😆

If you’re talking about OnlyFans here then you’re completely wrong.

I'd love to know what kind of backgrounds all the women on here come from, if they'd not say anything to their own daughter if she was on OF, think sex work is an absolutely normal choice of work for their child, and would be fine with the thought that men are masturbating over their daughter as she performs sex acts on camera.
It says so much about some women, when being seen as non-judgemental and "cool" overrides actually caring about their child.

Dont be a fool. The parents know.

Dictating to your adult “child” is not caring about your child.

It’s definitely nothing like Younique lol.

People can roughly work out what someone consistently earns on there by finding out what the subscription charge is and how many subscribers they’ve got. Minus the fee that OF retain (think it’s 20%)

Fascinating. Because a quick Google shows lots of articles that agree with me

It's really not your business. No good will come from you butting in. I find only fans repugnant but she's an adult and it's nothing to do with you.

Adult children are entitled to privacy from their parents.

It's not a pyramid scheme ffs!😅

Care to share with us?

Pretty sure you know how to Google

I am finding the determination from some on this thread to act as the only fans marketing board rather odd

So you can't back up what you're saying?

Fascinating, because some of us have real life experience and know it doesn’t work like that.

You set up your page, set your membership fee, promote your page on socials etc, people subscribe and pay your monthly fee which shows your “page”, similar to Instagram or Facebook in that once you’re a paying member you can see their “feed”.

You can also then sell additional content to your members, which is where the big money can be. Personalised videos/photos, video requests, photo requests, facetime calls, texts etc, all for an additional fee.

If your only knowledge of a topic comes from a quick Google search, you’re probably best keeping your thoughts about it to yourself :)