To use the men's toilets when the ladies is busy

[Everythingisnumbersnow]

A poster on another thread suggests this is unreasonably but I don't see why.

Yet statistically a woman is less safe on her own bathroom (or any other room) on her own house IE danger from partner violence than a random man in a random gents loo.

According to whom?

The sign on the fucking door.

You cant have it both ways

Have you ever asked a man?

Because I assumed that most men wouldn't care but during a conversation in a mixed group all of the men said its bad wough using the urinals with other men in there but they'd feel.vert uncomfortable with women in there.

They might not be at the same risk of sexual assault but a man with his cock out can still feel vulnerable.

Made me see it very differently tbh.

So, yes, it is invading men's spaces whether you personally think that matters or not.

This
presumably it would be okay then if a man wandered on in to the ladies if it was quiet

@JacquesHarlow I think it's very disappointing you've chosen to use the MRA term in a reasoned debate. Your DH might not care, but others may. We can't just eradicate all rights based on the thoughts or your husband.

That said, re your slightly ridiculous comment re men not being allowed spaces because of statistics, why would you or any other woman advocate going into a space where you allege the men will be waiting there to attack them? You clearly wouldn't want men in female spaces, so why on earth would you walk into theirs? It can't be as much of a threat as you imply in your comment if you advocate women walking in there alone!

I've definitely thought about it but stop myself because they'll feel awkward. Which makes me wonder about the men who do invade women's toilets- they must have the mentality that they don't care about women at all

What are you on about?
it’s a men’s toilet
it says so. I’m saying that means you shouldn’t be in there, as are many other posters.

By that theory, we shouldn't worry about men in women's toilets then, because statistically the person most likely to hurt them lives in their house.

The amount of false comparisons on this topic to allow women to just barge into men's spaces and do as they like (for example the OPs point about 'who says it's for men) while there being an issue about men in women's spaces is somewhat ironic, I feel. There's only so long people can hide behind the 'but they're bigger and stronger than us' to excuse effectively what is just entitlement.

It isn't a race to the bottom though. We can't just eradicate any feelings of all men because we are more likely to be hurt. That is really unfair. There is no need for women to use the men's toilet, other than 'wanting to'.

You told men they could go and use a different toilet because you had told them so? Is this real?

Presumably then men have the right to pee in an empty cubicle with the same door.....in the woman's.

I don't think a sign on the door has any intrinsic authority.

Yes because who cares.

Lots of people OP and I don't believe you don't know that
Although the more I read your comments about not following signs, the more I realise that you appear to think rules don't apply to you and you can do as you like, with no thought for the safety or feelings of others.

I wouldn’t.

Separate toilets aren’t about safety to me - there is nothing to stop anyone who wishes to attack someone from entering, and where I live there have been multiple episodes of men entering clearly marked ladies’ toilets and assaulting women and girls.

They are about modesty and privacy. Many women feel uncomfortable with men in a private space. Whenever I hear a woman say she can’t understand why women care I know immediately she’s never washed period blood out of her skirt at the sink in the ladies, and presumably does not know a wide range of women if she has never encountered one for whom privacy and modesty are important. Enough women care for it to be important.

The same is true for men. We don’t live in a society in which it’s the norm to share private spaces with the opposite sex outside of our families. Hence the creation and preservation of these spaces. I respect them.

Are you just on a wind up? Ffs

How could you counsel against men using women’s toilets when you’re using men’s toilets?

The only reason why this never happens is because there NEVER is more queue for the men's toilet than for the women's.

Best way around that is unisex stalls. Then everyone is equal and maybe provision will be made for enough stalls for everyone (once men have to wait just like women).

I don't think a lot of people care about a cupboard with an arbitrary man sticker on the door, no

We get it, you’re a rebel who won’t be told what to do. Well done you 😂

The vast majority of people follow rules, expectations and well, just manners. I'm not going to waste my time explaining the issues of mixed sex toilets because I doubt you'd care, but I would say that yes most people do care about respecting other people.

Surely OP wouldn't mind someone going into her house when she's out. She's not there, and the fact it belongs to her is arbitary.

How about needing to?

Its a redundant argument, because if I say that only if yiyre okay with men using your toilet someone will be along to say but they never have queues.

You can't have it all the ways though. If you genuinely believe men shouldn't be in women's spaces, due to the dangers, them you can't then claim needing the toilet overrides that

The answer is no. Nobody should be in the opposite sex toilet. If it's a theatre etc , leave a second before the interval, go before it starts. I dont believe that hundreds of women MUST go to the toilet while out at a certain time. If it's a need, then unless you have a conveniently timed bladder, you would need it during the show.

I don't see any reason ever why someone should use men's toilets , even if they're empty - someone can still go in. Unless they're absolutely desperate, and want to chance it, but that isn't what's being described in this thread.

People are even blaming men now for lack of toilet space. Take it up with the facilities!