to think DS's girlfriend is taking the piss and he needs legal advice

[redwingparty]

Keeping this short as I don't want DS to be outed, though I could write a very long post about this woman, but the main thing is:

DS2 has just bought a flat, his girlfriend has moved in and she is not paying him rent. She is lazy by nature (stayed with us at Christmas but refused to help prep food, lay the table or clear up afterwards because she 'didn't want to'; she spent most of her time in bed) She has just started a MW job and I overheard her say to DS that since he was not charging her anything to live with him, she will only do three days a week.

DS has a long commute, long hours and two second casual jobs at weekends.

I am worried that he will get fed up of her sponging off him but be unable to get her to leave the flat legally if it is her main home. What rights does she have?

Also she mentioned setting up a sideline business of her own from the spare bedroom of the flat which would involve strangers coming into the house. DS1 told me this is probably illegal and against the lease, and could invalidate the contents insurance. But I think DS would find it hard to say no to her (which in itself is a bit of a problem - he idolises her and she puts him down very subtly but frequently).

AIBU to think we should get some legal advice about her housing rights and rights to operate a small business (similar to hairdressing) from the flat?

I thought that too!

Unfortunately not your business

As mothers we can spot a train wreck a mile away but they never listen and often have to learn the hard way ...... several times .
My daughter is an adult and I've tried warning her several times about things she doesn't listen then the exact thing I said would happen does and she acts all surprised, I don't comment anymore and let her get on with it Unfortunately my poor grandaughter is dragged along for the ride but arguing with her gets me nowhere despite always being right in the end ( obv if my gd was in danger I'd step in regardless)

My point is, regardless of whether the property is owned or rented, why would OP's only concern being protecting her son's interests rather than

A) Supporting his relationship
B) If they separate, encouraging a fair approach.

OP is clearly happy to see this young woman on her arse as long as her son's interests are protected, whether the property be rented or owned.... and that's just toxic.

OP is clearly happy to see this young woman on her arse as long as her son's interests are protected, whether the property be rented or owned.... and that's just toxic.

Why should this young woman be "on her arse"? She's a girlfriend, there's no children. She pays rent and her share of bills. What protection should she have more than any other lodger? Why on earth should she have any claim on the flat?

If you can't alse see where I am coming from and why OPs post is toxic, then you are also part of the problem 👍

It's none of the OP's business but absent being married and/ or having children and/ or paying more than would be fair as rent and bills and/ or being persuaded by the OP's son to give up a caeer to look after him there's no moral or legal reason why a live in girlfriend should expect to get anything.

No, I can't see where you're coming from unless you think being female and finding a boyfriend equals entitlement to a meal ticket - and that's a toxic viewpoint.