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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

. . . to be annoyed at these parents?

202 replies

BananaBreadstick · 16/12/2024 00:20

Booked DD's 6th birthday party in our local church hall. I paid for a chocolate/sweet-making class for twenty kids; all parents confirmed they'd be going - great.

As people started to arrive, I noticed there were some older children arriving too, clearly siblings of the party attendees, but I was too involved with greetings and helping the chocolate workshop people set up to worry about if.

When the chocolate class started, I was busy in the kitchen getting food sorted for when the children had finished, so I didn't realise that the older children all lined up to collect chocolate-making supplies and joined in the class. The chocolate guys came up to me after, quite apologetically, and said that 25 kids had taken part, so there would be a balancing payment for the extra children. They'd told me this in advance - the package was for 20 but any extra would be £10 per child - and that was fine by me, as I didn't anticipate there would be any extra children! I reassured them that it was fine, not their fault, and I'd settle the balance, but I'm really annoyed at the parents who, firstly, didn't ask if it was okay for siblings to come, and secondly allowed them to take part in the activity. I even had to stop three of the older kids taking party bags as I only had one spare.

AIBU or is this just incredibly rude of the parents? If they'd asked in advance if siblings could come, I would have explained that the activity was chargeable per child so I was limited on numbers for that, but the siblings would be welcome to attend and have a slice of cake if the parents didn't have childcare. But to not even give me a heads-up . . . Angry

OP posts:
Imouttahere · 23/12/2024 15:44

Strangely enough, I've only had this happen with DS's birthdays when living in London. 1st time, a soft play venue (winter birthday). Had a gran call me on route to the venue. She told me off as she felt the address on the invite was misleading and she was now going to be late. I explained it was the address on the website. When she did finally 'find us', she had the invited child plus an older sibling that no one even knew existed! She'd been added to DS's list and her food order already taken.
The 2nd time, again a soft play, a several years older step brother was brought along and actively encouraged by SM to take a party bag. A party bag made for 5 year olds. Since moving out of London, we've not had this issue. Any siblings that are brought along, the parents pay for them without being asked, sort their own food and don't try to sneak a party bag. Less stress

Cm19841 · 23/12/2024 20:45

Yes it is rude.

Personally, I would pay the additional cost and chalk it up to experience. Next year the invite would be more explicit. "As much we'd love to, we can't invite siblings. Thanks for understanding".

That's it. Move on. People are rude. Push back.

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