Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Friend not sharing discount?

216 replies

KellyJellyfish · 04/12/2024 09:56

I admit this is a very first world problem, but it’s been bothering me a bit so just thought I’d ask what others think.

I recently came back from mat leave, DD starts nursery in a couple weeks and of course it’s Christmas so money for me is tight and has been for a while.

A friend and me decided we would go to the cinema next week, this is a rare treat for me and I haven’t been to the cinema in several years, it’s not the cheapest experience anymore so I was already planning on forgoing popcorn and drinks to keep the cost down. My friend is aware of my situation, we also work together so she knows about mat leave and how our company only offers statuary, and I’ve been lamenting to her about the cost of nursery fees and how the family is only doing gifts for the kids this year.

Anyway, we’ve settled on a date and time, it’s a popular film so we decided to book together (otherwise we may not get seats together) I suggested to her my husband books the tickets as he gets a 40% discount for friends and family through work, but I mentioned it had been years since he last booked so I will double check with him first if he still gets this discount, she agreed.

Next day rolls around and I forgot to ask husband (turns out yes he does still get the discount), but then friend said don’t worry about it as she’s got a free cinema ticket (from a reward scheme tied to her bank or something) so she’ll take care of booking the tickets. I thanked her and said she should ping me a request for the money and I’ll pay her back.

Well last night I got her text, there was a copy of both our tickets and a money request for one full price ticket for me to pay. I had assumed she was going to share the saving of her free ticket so we’d both pay half price, instead she kept the free ticket for herself and stuck me with paying full price, even though I told her my husband could get us both a good discount.

I haven’t said anything because I imagine she just didn’t think it through and there’s no point falling out over cinema tickets, but I’m still annoyed about it. Obviously I know I’m
not entitled to her free ticket, but she could have saved it for another time instead of denying me my husbands discount?

OP posts:
HerSisterWasAWitch · 04/12/2024 09:59

But she couldn’t get you both the offer, meaning she would be subsiding your ticket. Your DH could have got you both a discount, which was nice of you to offer, but you forgot.

Pompeyssy · 04/12/2024 10:00

I wouldn't be impressed, and I would do my own thing in future.

Tink3rbell30 · 04/12/2024 10:01

She's had you there, very selfish.

HadEnoughOfBears · 04/12/2024 10:02

Yeah if that had been me I would have used the voucher to get a free ticket then split the cost of the other ticket.
Judging by the first reply though not everyone thinks like this 🤷🏻‍♀️

QueSyrahSyrah · 04/12/2024 10:02

But if you hadn't forgotten to ask your Husband then this wouldn't have happened?

Original poster
KellyJellyfish · 04/12/2024 10:02

HerSisterWasAWitch · 04/12/2024 09:59

But she couldn’t get you both the offer, meaning she would be subsiding your ticket. Your DH could have got you both a discount, which was nice of you to offer, but you forgot.

We still had time, they didn’t need to be booked that day. It’s been 3 days since and the cinema is still mostly empty (it’s a popular film but an unpopular time)

OP posts:
LittleRedRidingHoody · 04/12/2024 10:03

I think you're being a bit unreasonable. You both agreed to go, she was probably planning on using the free ticket all along, when you said your husband would book she decided to take the hit and pay more to subsidise you. When he didn't, she went back to her original plan.

I get maternity leave sucks and sharing the discount would have been nice of her, but it's not out of order. You were happy to pay full price to begin with.

Original poster
KellyJellyfish · 04/12/2024 10:05

LittleRedRidingHoody · 04/12/2024 10:03

I think you're being a bit unreasonable. You both agreed to go, she was probably planning on using the free ticket all along, when you said your husband would book she decided to take the hit and pay more to subsidise you. When he didn't, she went back to her original plan.

I get maternity leave sucks and sharing the discount would have been nice of her, but it's not out of order. You were happy to pay full price to begin with.

No she didn’t actually know she had a free ticket until after I told her about my husbands discount, she had assumed she would be paying something up until yesterday when she got the notification from her bank she had this reward available

OP posts:
TooManyCupsAndMugs · 04/12/2024 10:05

I think that's a bit off. If I use my Meerkat meals discount when I'm out with a friend, I'd split the bill not say "oh my dinner was free, pay for yours!"

Onthesideofthespiders · 04/12/2024 10:05

Why didnt you just book separately but choose seats together? Then she could use her free ticket and you could get the 40% discount.

You forgot to ask your husband and maybe she just didn’t trust you to actually sort it out so she did it her way. Next time, either don’t forgot or agree from the beginning to book your own.

getahhtmapub · 04/12/2024 10:05

It's friends discount to use as she wishes. If it's through her bank it's not a 'freebie' it's kind of a paid for benefit that's part of her account fee.

You forgot to ask your DH so she probably assumed you weren't bothered about a discount or were happy to just ha wa rocket booked.

I've booked airline tickets before for a group and used my airmiles to reduce the cost of my ticket. I wouldn't be passing on the saving to the whole group. If they had discounts they wanted to use I'd expect them to say so and book their own. Same thing here I think.

ClicketyClickPlusOne · 04/12/2024 10:06

It’s a popular film, you wanted to make sure you could get seats together…and then you didn’t do what you said you would do to get the 40% off.

And if you had, she would have paid 60% of ticket price instead of her free ticket.

In her shoes I would have scared the benefit of her free ticket but I think this is a ‘six of one ‘ situation.

LittleRedRidingHoody · 04/12/2024 10:06

Also, it's not necessarily 'free', because she's paid for whatever service. I pay for Monzo Perks (£7 a month I think) mainly because I get a free cinema ticket out of it, otherwise I'd probably cancel. So yes, it's free to claim but she's 'paid for it' already so to speak.

NantesElephant · 04/12/2024 10:06

HadEnoughOfBears · 04/12/2024 10:02

Yeah if that had been me I would have used the voucher to get a free ticket then split the cost of the other ticket.
Judging by the first reply though not everyone thinks like this 🤷🏻‍♀️

Isn’t this just basic decency?

Original poster
KellyJellyfish · 04/12/2024 10:06

Also I never suspected I’d been paying full price because of husbands discount, I just told her I needed to double check but was 99% certain be got it as he’s had it for years and years

OP posts:
getahhtmapub · 04/12/2024 10:07

'Ha wa rocket booked' was meant to be 'book your own' Confused

Onthesideofthespiders · 04/12/2024 10:08

If you really can’t afford the £10 for a cinema ticket then just reply and say you had been planning to use your husband’s discount and only have the budget to pay for 60% of your ticket price so does she want to split the ticket cost or cancel her ticket so you can book your own?

Thisisntthowisawthisgoing · 04/12/2024 10:08

HadEnoughOfBears · 04/12/2024 10:02

Yeah if that had been me I would have used the voucher to get a free ticket then split the cost of the other ticket.
Judging by the first reply though not everyone thinks like this 🤷🏻‍♀️

Yeah I don't think it would have occurred to me to do this any other way and like the OP I'd have been left feeling surprised to be paying full price rather than a 40% discount from the husband or 50% from the friend!

I'm not sure I'd do this but you could go back and suggest you split the ticket 60:40 as you were going to pay 60% anyway? I'd probably just put up though and add it to the long list of things I'm now overly controlling over because of a bad experience in the past.

getahhtmapub · 04/12/2024 10:08

LittleRedRidingHoody · 04/12/2024 10:06

Also, it's not necessarily 'free', because she's paid for whatever service. I pay for Monzo Perks (£7 a month I think) mainly because I get a free cinema ticket out of it, otherwise I'd probably cancel. So yes, it's free to claim but she's 'paid for it' already so to speak.

Exactly this.

whatnow5 · 04/12/2024 10:10

Nope, this is just plain mean. I would mention it to her and just said “oh you shouldn’t have bothered booking. I would rather have used DH’s discount to get 40% off, rather than paying full price.”

She would have been benefitting from 40% off as well if you had booked, so it’s mean to take a 100% discount and give you 0%.

Original poster
KellyJellyfish · 04/12/2024 10:11

NantesElephant · 04/12/2024 10:06

Isn’t this just basic decency?

Show quote history

This is certainly what I think yes, and it’s how I use my discounts on group outings, for example I offered to share husbands discount with her when I could have kept it to myself.

Not everyone agrees though, that’s why I posted here though to see what others thought.

I think people are getting a bit hung up on the timing thing. We’re seeing the film in the morning on a smaller screen, it’s not a popular time so we had plenty of time to book, but there is always a risk if you try to book separately you may not be able to select seats right next to each other. There was never a risk it would sell out and we’d miss out, not many people see films first thing in the morning (the later showing on the bigger screen is the one that’s selling out fast)

OP posts:
Viviennemary · 04/12/2024 10:11

That was quite cheeky of her. I wouldnt go and write off the cost of the ticket and drop the friendship. I can't be doing with this selfish meanness in folk that are supposed to be friends.

DeliciousApples · 04/12/2024 10:17

I'd give her half the price of the both tickets. "There's my half thanks so much and apologies again I forgot to ask DH to book"

If she says anything is just say
"surely we half in? That's what I'd have done if husband got a discount, I'd not have kept it to myself I'd have halfed the price between us. You know I'm skint".

B1anche · 04/12/2024 10:19

I think it is really mean of her. I would be tempted to book a separate ticket (with discount) for a seat next to one of the seats she has booked, and tell her you hadn't budgetted for a full price ticket. You didn't ask her to book so she can't complain.

I'm amazed at the number of responses from people who would keep the full discount for themselves. I would never do that to a friend.

StrawberrySquash · 04/12/2024 10:21

I don't understand why she didn't book her own free ticket and tell you to book your own at 60% cost? Or was one of the offers only if you booked a pair?