Friend not sharing discount?

[KellyJellyfish]

I admit this is a very first world problem, but it’s been bothering me a bit so just thought I’d ask what others think.

I recently came back from mat leave, DD starts nursery in a couple weeks and of course it’s Christmas so money for me is tight and has been for a while.

A friend and me decided we would go to the cinema next week, this is a rare treat for me and I haven’t been to the cinema in several years, it’s not the cheapest experience anymore so I was already planning on forgoing popcorn and drinks to keep the cost down. My friend is aware of my situation, we also work together so she knows about mat leave and how our company only offers statuary, and I’ve been lamenting to her about the cost of nursery fees and how the family is only doing gifts for the kids this year.

Anyway, we’ve settled on a date and time, it’s a popular film so we decided to book together (otherwise we may not get seats together) I suggested to her my husband books the tickets as he gets a 40% discount for friends and family through work, but I mentioned it had been years since he last booked so I will double check with him first if he still gets this discount, she agreed.

Next day rolls around and I forgot to ask husband (turns out yes he does still get the discount), but then friend said don’t worry about it as she’s got a free cinema ticket (from a reward scheme tied to her bank or something) so she’ll take care of booking the tickets. I thanked her and said she should ping me a request for the money and I’ll pay her back.

Well last night I got her text, there was a copy of both our tickets and a money request for one full price ticket for me to pay. I had assumed she was going to share the saving of her free ticket so we’d both pay half price, instead she kept the free ticket for herself and stuck me with paying full price, even though I told her my husband could get us both a good discount.

I haven’t said anything because I imagine she just didn’t think it through and there’s no point falling out over cinema tickets, but I’m still annoyed about it. Obviously I know I’m
not entitled to her free ticket, but she could have saved it for another time instead of denying me my husbands discount?

This has got me thinking of a meal I have booked in with friends next weekend. A few months ago I went to a restaurant (independent, not a chain) with a group of colleagues and I paid, and the next day sent the bill to the work whatsapp chat so everyone could transfer me what they owed (we often do this, it saves faffing about on the night, and also avoids any awkward “even bill split” suggestions). But it was only once home, after paying, when I sent the picture on the group, that I noticed we’d been charged £7 for a desert we didn’t have. I wasn’t too hopeful, but contacted the restaurant and explained the situation and asked if there was any way that money could be refunded. I expected them to say no as we couldn’t prove we hadn’t had it, but as a gesture of good will they sent a £10 voucher.
So anyway, I’m going to that same restaurant with different friends, a group of four, next week and I will be taking my £10 voucher code. I have no intention of sharing it with my friends, I plan to just use it to get £10 off my own meal. But maybe that’s a slightly different situation as I did technically pay for £7 of that months ago.

Yeah that's rude of her, she should have split the cost of one ticket.

She wasn’t bothered if your husband could get you both a 40% discount simply because she had a way to get a better offer for herself. She didn’t make that at all clear and was pretty thoughtless. The polite / kind thing for her to do would, of course, been to split the cost of the remaining ticket between you.
I’d have been irritated enough to text ‘I thought we were using one of the discounts to reduce the price of both tickets between us. Didn’t realise you weren’t or I’d have used my husband’s discount on my own.’

She was mean but I wouldn't have picked it up with her.
You should have checked the deal your husband has and used that for both of you.

Your friend's cheaper than her free ticket!!

Not a good look. I wouldn't feel the same about her after that move.

I think you’re both YABU.

She should have said that she has a free ticket but that you should book your own ticket with your discount if you have one.

You should have clarified with her about the ticket price instead of just thanking her, you shouldn’t have assumed she would pay half your ticket.

On balance I think she’s behaved a bit selfishly. If you go out with her be very clear on the plans and don’t do her any favours.

If she said don’t worry about your discount as she has a free ticket and shel book the tickets, then that means she shares the discount. I’d say something. Like hang on a minute, why am I paying a full ticket price again? Get her to explain her logic.

She should have told you that she got a free ticket so best to get your own, l would not be impressed either, it's a mean trick to do.

It's mean spirited. I would have split the cost.

I wonder if it was buy one ticket, get one free. In which case she couldn't have benefited unless you went which would be ever more justification for splitting the cost.

However, I would let it go. But make sure you only ever pick up your share with her in future.

I get that cinema is expensive but you're whinging on about what....£15-20?

I think it’s really mean the way she’s handled it. She’s jumped in there quick to get tickets so she can use her freebie on herself. I have a relative who regularly tries tricks like this. I know somethings afoot when she wants to arrange anything 🤣 She should have split the cost, given you chance to get your tickets with the discount or saved her free ticket for another occasion. You’ve been had. If she tries similar again I’d consider ending the friendship. If she hasn’t got the tickets yet I would probably say you’ve decided that you need to get tickets with husbands discount as originally discussed. She won’t be happy but she didn’t care about you so just do it. Good luck x

I wouldn’t get in to any discussion, simply pay her 50% of the total cost (including booking fees).

If her deal is ‘buy one get one free’ she technically isn’t entitled to a ‘free’ ticket unless it’s her paying for one.

Your friend is selfish 😟. I wouldn’t feel the same about the friendship after this.

Not sure that’s fair, the op was entitled to four pounds discount, so she could ask the friend for four pounds if she feels so strongly about it.

Message her back asking if anyone else wants to go with you both who can pay for the ticket she bought as you can book your own ticket with 40% discount as you need to save as much money as possible. It might prompt her to offer to pay half.

You offered to book with you husbands discount.
You forgot.
You wanted to boom together so you got seats together.
Your friend handled the booking because you flaked for some reason.
She realised she had a free ticket to use (essentially paid for somehow if it’s a perk from a bank account) so realised her part of the transaction was free.
She responded to you saying you’d send money by telling you how much your ticket cost.

Its bizarre that you think she’s done anything wrong. Your husbands discount wouldn’t cost you anything to share. Sharing her free ticket would cost her 50% of a full ticket price.

In future, if you say you’ll do something, then do it.