Friend asking for money

[Goldilock1234]

Good Morning All,

I have been advised by another friend to post on here for some unbiased advice, so here I am.

Bit of back story on myself. Single mum working full time, my daughters father decided to die on me 10 years ago so no help from him (sorry for my dark humour) - got 30k in an inheritance pay out last Jan. I have never had spare money- I have enough to get by, but never any savings etc. This money has obviously given me a lovely boost.

The June after I received the money I had a message from one of my best friends saying she was in trouble and needed to borrow 6k urgently or she would lose her house. She promised I would have it back the following month. She did not pay it back and it got to the awkward stage of her never mentioning it where I had to bring it up. She kept promising weekly that she would pay the money into my account that Friday. It never came- there was always an excuse of why she couldn't pay. It got extremely stressful and the excuses of why she couldn't became ridiculous.

Anyway, it got to the point that she was going on luxury holidays and bought a new car so I met up with her and flat out said it was causing me a lot of stress and I was panicking it was not coming back. I know people say not to lend money you don't have spare but honestly I thought the friendship was strong.

Long story short she sent it back, I had a discussion about how it had made me feel mugged off and we moved on. I made a vow to myself never to lend money again.

She has messaged me this morning asking to borrow 4k again as she has overspent on something and is unable to pay off a debt on her mortgage again and is saying she will pay it back next week.

I now feel awkward and disappointed. I am not lending it to her after the stress of last time and I am just very upset she seems to be seeing me as a cash cow- despite knowing how much I have struggled and this is the first time I have been able to provide stability and a stable plan for my daughters future.

Now I also feel like I should be helping her as the money is there (but it is not spare money to me- it's sitting there but it's allocated in savings to something), but I do not want to go through this process again with her of trying to get it back.

Thankyou.

Thank you. That's very kind of you.

”How about you don’t assume the money left for my child’s future by my dead husband is going to be available to you when you make the choice to overspend or I dunno, maybe lie to me and take a trip to the Maldives…?”

She trying to make you feel guilty for saying no, she is very manipulative and twisting it to make herself the victim. I would walk away from this ‘friendship’ now, I bet she is the type of friend you only see if she needs a shoulder to cry on or wants to go out etc but never there for you.

I don’t think the money is from her husband. He died 10 years ago. She got some inheritance one year ago from someone else.

Still wants to save money for her child and herself or emergencies if needed though.

She's got some nerve! Good for you for telling her what for!

Just say no

I'm curious if she paid you back by asking to borrow off someone else - or multiple people. Then if someone is asking for their money back she wants to borrow off you to pay them and the debt is like a nasty pass the parcel.

I think the reply to this should be Ditto.

How rude to try to make you the bad guy. I would avoid her.
Think positive thoughts and put it behind you. Best to say all investments are locked now. I have friends who constantly ask me what I earn. I say ask my accountant. It's so embarrassing.

This is a seasoned BS artist. And she has by no means given up hope that she can still manipulate and guilt you into giving the loan - the tone and wording of the reply show that she is trying to flip the narrative and somehow put the blame on you for recognising that shes a CF and a bad credit risk, based on recent bitter experience! Block and carry on with your life. If she tries to tell a sad story behind your back, you can feel absolute zero sense of loyalty, tell everyone the unvarnished truth.

No please don't, it will cause you so much stress. She disrespected you last time, and will again. A real friend wouldn't do that. Be strong!

You are a single parent with children who are reliant upon you so lending money " doesn't work for me ( you)". And if she ignores you or finishes the friendship or gives you backlash then she sees no benefit or value in you.

Her reply was a "poor me" reply with no attempt to understand your point of view. She has shown she isn't a friend.

What a bitch. She should feel awkward ffs. At least now you know she isn't a true friend.

“You think that’s awkward? Try being me having to call you repeatedly trying to get my bloody money back only to find out you’re in the Maldives!”

Awkward is as awkward does 😂

Lmfao

what a melt…

i hope daily fail pick this up.

she deserves to be publicly shamed

Posting for further updates! 🙏 @Goldilock1234

Excellent response , and OP really needs to take your advice on board as her ‘friend’ is trying to put her on a guilt trip. No true friend would do this

Absolutely fabulous retort!!! 👏👏👏

Tell her to fuck off! Cheeky bitch!