To find this horrendously unattractive

[TheSleepiestOne]

DP is a bit of an Elevenarife and either it’s getting worse or I’m just losing the patience to deal with it. I’ve been bent over double for two days with vomiting and a headache but somehow been able to run around after a toddler with an infant strapped to my chest. Still breastfeeding even though I’ve not eaten in over 48 hours. DP is off today. “Brilliant”, I think, “some help with the children and a chance to get some rest!”

No such luck. DP has been staggering around, huffing and puffing about stomach cramps. Logical, you might think. If one of us is ill it’s likely the other will catch it. Not quite. My symptoms are an adverse reaction to anaesthetic.

Thinking back, I don’t think I’ve ever had an illness or injury where DP hasn’t instantly had the same or worse. I actually can’t remember a single occasion.

So now Mrs Muggins is off to the park with the dog and children so they don’t have to stay in the dark house where all the curtains have been drawn to aid the banishment of the phantom cramps.

YABU - have a bit of empathy, the man’s clearly unwell

YANBU - this is off putting

I don't get it. Why does any woman tolerate this? It's grossly unattractive and pathetic behaviour. It's lying and faking being unwell so they don't have to care for you. What kind of a person does that? Surely you would have to be incredibly selfish and dishonest? Why stay with someone like this?

That sounds like classic attention seeking

If he starts grunting again maybe you start whenever you move. He sounds a complete berk. You have my deep sympathy for your pain(s)

It’s so interesting that a lot of men like to big themselves and their manliness up but are quite happy to pretend they’re incapable of caring for their wife/kids bc they have a bad cold. Also, why is their illness preventing them from doing so but they expect their wives/partners to power through their own?

That’s admitting they’re a lot softer (pathetic). Of course we all know it’s laziness and utter selfishness, but objectively - why do they think their wives are more capable of fulfilling their parenting duties when they themselves feel like shit? What’s their argument? That their ‘condition’ is much worse? 🤷🏼‍♀️😤🤬

@Sceptical123 yep. Fully agree. What the fuck is wrong with some of them? 🤣🤷

Jeez, this would get on my nerves big time. 🙄😒

He sounds like a bit of a dweeb tbh… seriously , why do men do this! Drives me insane.
I would definitely have a ‘word’ with him about this….

I’m so glad he’s your ex…. What a complete twat.

That wins the internet today 😆

If there’s any chance he’s contagious you must obviously confine him to bedroom with water and dry toast or similar. Then indulge yourself in something really great to eat which smells fantastic throughout the house. 🤣🤣

In my circle we call people like this
'Tommy Two Shits' - we all 'go for a 💩'...Tommy goes for two 💩 💩 🤷‍♀️

I have one of these too. I have been known to fake symptoms just to test him. I have lost count of the number of times I have shouted at him but he looks like a sad puppy who genuinely seems to have no idea he does it. Twat

My dad had always done this to my mum, it’s just so weird.

Genuine question....those of you in relationships with men like this, are you having sex? I don't think I could.

Mine died 10 years ago. Turned out he really was ill the last time

My sister’s first husband had this. She said it started with a man flu. It got progressively worse. Also wanted her to take off from work to look after him. Bring him tea, make soup, bring him tissues and clean up his used tissues etc. something similar to what you’re experiencing now, but she could not move, was her last straw.

Well I married a health hypochondriac. He then had a serious health condition for real and over the decades has had many, many more, only possibly one or two could have been psychosomatic...

My ex was like this too. We both had Covid and he literally went to bed for a week and left me to look after a baby and a 1 year old totally on my own. Selfish arse he is. All I heard after was his was so much worse than I was. Then when I dared to say I had to cope being ill and look after the kids he would then say you just better than me. This is just one of a million examples I could give. And this is why he is now an ex, don’t allow him to get away with behaving like this.

if yours is a reaction does that mean you have just had an op then? surely you should be taking it easy
yes i had a really bad cold the other week i felt worse as my B12 was due but i had to struggle on with my shop alone the one afternoon i had some time to go home place was in such a mess i had to turn round to clean up so may as well stayed at work would have had more rest!
this week he is ill and yes he now has covid or flu or similar not just a cold

Man up, I'd say to him.

@ClytemnestraWasMisunderstood did you spell it correctly?!

I was hospitalised earlier this year with pneumonia and sepsis. As I was hooked up to a drip and having to take all sorts of supplements and medication, feeling very much like death, he was telling me how ill and exhausted he was.

The thing I really despise is that he can never equate how hard he finds it when looking after DS to how that is for me all the time as the one who does everything for our child 99% of the time. His work is so stressful, he's so exhausted etc etc, but then on the very odd occassions he looks after DS he has tolerance levels below minus. If I ever mention that, yes, it is really hard for me too he becomes so unbelievably mardy that I no longer bother. Even though it was burn out that put me in hospital. I guess I'll just die next time and he'll have to find a way to out do that.

The tragedy of men is they have to project a tough image to the world when, hands down, women are far, far tougher any and every day of the week. Poor, sick lambs, there there, have a lollipop.

I put yabu because I would be opening the curtains, giving kids to your fella and going to bed.

Unfortunately, this was just the beginning of his crap but I did leave and despite his many attempts to win me back, I will never go back.

Funnily enough, I've been ill this week with a pretty bad cold and he was due to have the children on Wednesday as per the schedule. I asked him to collect them as I couldn't drop them off at his as I didn't feel well enough and he arrived at the door having suddenly developed a terrible cough.. Quelle surprise!

Brilliant imagery👌