To think if you're invited for lunch you should leave shortly after lunch?

[purplebeansprouts]

say you go round at 11 and then lunch is at12:30 I'd personally be making moves to leave at the most 1 hour after. aibu?

I'd expect if the invite is to come at 11am, lunch at 12:30pm, then I'd be expecting to leave at 2-ish. You want to chat over lunch, not wolf down the food then rush off. I normally think 3 hour window, maybe 4 is the right amount of time if it's at someone's home.

Meeting at a restaurant, then 2-ish hours is suitable.

Obviously if host has someplace to be- then that would have been communicated earlier.

Depends heavily on context, I’d personally feel very rude if I went for lunch then left as soon as I’d eaten

God no, coming for lunch for me could often mean hanging out till 3 or 4 pm 😂

Come for lunch, leave by 4pm

If I invite someone for dinner, I’d assume invitation extended to the evening to socialise afterwards. same with lunch; if I invite someone for lunch I would assume we would socialise afterwards for the afternoon. I would think someone rude if they came round for lunch and left after I fed them.

I'd probably expect lunch to finish at around 1.30/2 and would probably hang around for a bit longer for tea/coffee. I'd expect to leave about 4

Same here- lunch at 1 ish, finished eating, chatting at the table by 2.30 ish, offer to help clear up/chat for another hour or so, leave by 4.

Come for lunch and be gone well before it’s time to start thinking about tea (5pm onwards realistically ) so the host doesn’t feel obliged to offer . Probably about 4

No, esp if I haven't seen them in a while or they travelled a long distance. I'd want a natter and except them to leave around 4pm

Firstly I've never been invited for lunch that early because none of my friends live in a hospital, nursing home or school. Secondly if you are serving lunch at 12:30 and want them to hit the road by 1:30 at latest, then I don't think that is a reasonable expectation unless you have spelled out in advance that you need them gone by 1:30.

Rude to leave almost as soon as you’ve finished eating. An hour from when you sit down in the comfy seats after lunch would be fine.

I’d say leave at 4 ish

I would normally expect to leave at about 3.30/4pm after lunch at someone's house. I think if you want people to leave right after lunch, it's better to meet in a restaurant instead. As PP have said, it's pretty rude to eat and then leave right away.

I think arriving an hour and half before is odd and 12.30 is a bit early. Personally for me I’d say arrive at 12.30 and then food around 1pm. Would probably anticipate people staying until 4ish maybe later.

Lunch is served at 12.30pm and takes until around 1.30pm to eat? (Two courses, coffee or tea, chat) could take longer. Then you think about leaving an hour after finishing, so around 2.30 - 3pm? Ok.

I went for lunch at 1.00 this year....we left at 7pm. Great afternoon and we still see the hosts and have been for lunch since when we left at 4.30pm

I no longer invite people to the house due to people having different ideas about hosting.

I think meeting out and paying my own bill for what I consumed (not splitting it equally) makes life much better for me.

Relaxed Sunday lunch at home - probably 3-4pm (if eating as early as you are). Get yourself out of the way before dinner prep needs to start.

The whole point of going to lunch at someone's home is to spend time with them in a relaxed way during and after. Chat, let the children play etc.

This is the sort of thing that really needs communicating beforehand, OP. As shown on this thread, expectations vary wildly.

I'd want any lunch guests gone by 2 but others clearly find it rude to leave so soon.

If having friends over I make sure I set a clear end point by way of 'I need to collect DS from X' or 'I have an appointment at X' or 'my DD needs her nap'. Gives me an out and makes socialising easier for me to manage.

They wanted to arrive at 10!

One course. We don't do pudding really.

An invitation to lunch means you leave before dinner so I agree with what pp have said - leave around 4. Leaving at 1.30 is just a flyby.

How to we make them leave? We've hinted heavily.

How do we initiate a flyby next time?

Weekday or Saturday lunch - more likely to be other things going on, wouldn't expect to linger so long.

If somebody arrived at 11am for lunch, I wouldn’t answer the door. We’d all just be getting up. If you’re invited for lunch, you arrive at 12:30/1pm. Eat lunch and leave anytime before 9pm, of course if you don’t want your guests to stay then you don’t offer wine/fizz/mimosa or bloody Mary’s with lunch and just give tea and coffee then stop offering any more refreshments when foods been eaten and start clearing the table and stacking the dishwasher. Then you make sure the conversations dries up and sit in silence with an occasional glance at your watch. I’d be running out of there asap.