To think if you're invited for lunch you should leave shortly after lunch?

[purplebeansprouts]

say you go round at 11 and then lunch is at12:30 I'd personally be making moves to leave at the most 1 hour after. aibu?

I don't even speak to my in laws. But if I did I wouldn't put a time on their visit. My home is their home if they want to pop in the can, if they want to join us for a meal they can, same applies for my mum n dad. I have cut offs for acquaintances not family or friends. I mean, then again I am happy to let you talk and my housing officer can easily spend 3 hours here. I often have workmen who would rather take the break in here then go out, if they are here when I cook they get fed if they are hungry. They get access to hot drinks or cold drinks as and when they want. I know others are different but I couldn't imagine turning anyone away really. If I'm pottering around my garden and the neighbour is. I get drinks for everyone not just for me. It's just how I was brought up. I honestly wish I could sit for a few hours with my in laws but it's their choice to isolate their son because they have very narrow views about people with autism been allowed to marry. They know I would let them in anytime but they chose not too. I could understand expecting someone you just met to leave by a certain time but this is your partner's parents they raised him.

I agree. Leave around 3.30/4 if lunch at 1.
Rude otherwise.

Wot no pudding?

Depends who the lunch was with and if copious amounts of alcohol were involved.

This.

Think it depends very much on the relationship.
I go to my parents for a cuppa and end up staying hours… I have friends who if you go there for a cuppa you stay an hour and then they start looking at their watch or dropping hints, so I know to drink the tea quick and leave…. I’ve got other friends who would be gutted if I didn’t stay 2 or 3 hours!
I think if you want them gone by a certain time it’s at to say ‘would you like to come for lunch?… if you arrive at (time) I’ll do lunch for (time) and then you leave at about (time) so I can dinner ready/get ready for Pilates/walk dogs etc !!

I would say about 4 hours, same for lunch or dinner, that’s a good time to have food and good chats. X

That's a good one, I'm using that one when the MIL won't leave after she's been here for a long weekend thats gone on for a fortnight.

All decisions depend on the context, the relationship and the people.

I am late to this party but aren’t you meant to turn a broom upside down?
probably works even faster if you do it infront of them!!

OK, OP! We aren't mind readers! You have indeed drip-fed us all and you have indeed made yourself look like a poor host with no regard for their in-laws.

Forget the wine and dessert - Nobody should be hung-up on that!

You have presumed we knew the context of the situation, but then gone on to mention they aren't very nice, there are medical conditions, it's your in-laws and not friends, they are in a hotel, they make digs etc etc ...

Context from the start, OP!

Either way, you have presented yourself poorly. Your husband should be ashamed at treating his parents with such contempt. They won't always be around. What will he do when they are dead? What about the wake? "You've had your wake lunch now F* off!."

Unless you are ND, then I can see why you are behaving the way you are -perhaps-. You did mention medical conditions. Next time eat out and then you can all leave when you want. Stop hosting unless you're gonna get your act together.

As I see it, it depends on how close you are to your guests/hosts. The closer you are, the longer you can stay, I'd say, as long as you read the situation and feel it's okay to. A 3-hour window would be alright, I guess.