To think if you're invited for lunch you should leave shortly after lunch?

[purplebeansprouts]

say you go round at 11 and then lunch is at12:30 I'd personally be making moves to leave at the most 1 hour after. aibu?

Anyone I invited to lunch, friend or family, I’d expect to settle in for an afternoon of sobremesa!

I’d expect to stay until at least 3, possibly 4. I’ve been to family for lunch today and arrived at 12:15, left at 3pm (but only that early because my sister who’d been there for the weekend wanted to head home.

I would say about 4pm too - it's not an in then out job socialising for lunch.

Christ, you're nice. Maybe just don't invite them round again if you resent spending more than 2 hours with your friends?

Offer them a 'last drink before you go'?

It's Sunday, do you have kids who need to get stuff ready for back to school tomorrow after Half Term?

May need to be until. 'We've loved having you but need to get things ready for work/school tomorrow, do you need any help gathering your coats?'

You invite someone to lunch serving only one course and then don't want them to stay to socialise? Why extend the invitation to start with ?

They aren't my friends they are my inlaws

They've been there since 11?

Ha, oh dear, you need to start talking about all the other things you need to get done today.

Then move to 'well it's been lovely to see you but we need to do x, y, z now'.

Yes and that was only because I made crystal clear if they came round at 10 as planned no one would be in

I think now you've said it's the in laws I'd expect that they'd stay a bit longer and catch up even more.

Well is the issue the lunch aspect of the visit or the fact that they want to be in your house much longer than you want them to be there? If they were always planning on spending 5 or 6 hours with you, then by pushing back the start time you have naturally pushed back the finish time. If the plan at the outset had been for them to come over for a quick lunch, then arrive by midday and leave by 2.30 might be acceptable (although I would expect that to have been clearly communicated).
In my 20s, Sunday lunch often went on into early evening and ended up in the pub.

Why so inhospitable?

We went out Friday night. Did a day trip with them yesterday and today they are meant to be going home

That doesn't make it any better! You still invited them for lunch. What does your partner think about his/her Mum and Dad still being there?

Stand up, say its been lovely to see them but you have to be getting on with XYZ and how lovely it would be to do this again sometime. Then get their coats.

I have no problem telling people when its time for them to leave my house. I'd hate to feel I had overstayed my welcome, so I would much rather people behave as I do. Knowing that I am treating people as I would like to be treated means I have the self-assurance to so.

Yes if my in-laws came for lunch i would expect thrm to stay til just before tea, inthink yabu here

He's been texting me regularly on the sly asking why they haven't left.

My lunch guests are still here (it's after 4pm).

Clearly different families have different expectations!

Ooh bold! I like it. I'm going to do that

For flyby visit suggest they pop in for a tea or coffee at 11am.

One course is a bit scrimpy somehow for a one off catch up lunch

Then you have a DP problem. Get him to turf them out.

Really depends on context but I think it’s rude to leave straight after the meal. I’d normally invite people to eat a bit later and would assume they would be there until late afternoon (or even later!)

Not wrong to do it earlier but best to manage expectations eg tell them you have a commitment so sadly they’ll need to leave by X.

@purplebeansprouts then that's a completely different context than what you posted about, massive drip feed there!

If you always see them regularly then why invite them for lunch after seeing them the other 2 days. If they're only down for a weekend and it's less regular, then what a lot of people are saying probably still stands.

The times when I have invited a group of friends for lunch, to start about 14.00, they left at midnight. If they'd gone much before then, I would have thought they weren't enjoying themselves!