Mum will not call my son by his actual name

[Cheesybashful]

There more I think about this, the more it is getting to me.

Basically, I had my second child a few months ago, and my mum keeps calling him by other names instead of the one I chose for him. I'm not sure if she is doing it in a cutesy way (I'm not sure how it's cute, but I'm trying to understand her thinking), or is she trying to undermine the name I gave him on some level?

Is this something that happens? They are not cute pet names. They are just literal different names. Such as Johnny or Ellis?

Lean in and tell her the name has grown on you so much you have decided to change his name Elon musk current name surname. In fact you like the name so much that you are going to change your own name to Elona Musk at the same time and your husband is going to be Elon musk current name surname Senior but at the moment you can't quite decide how to incorporate Elon musk into your first borns name, does she have any ideas? Won't it be cute when you are all Elon Musk.

I say this as the reason my little sister has the middle name she has. It was the name I called her so much that everyone thought it was her real name but being 4 it was cute as well as annoying!

Call her by a different name

Get your husband and DC to do the same

She's bonkers

I hope she doesn't come round much

She's rude

Oh, I couldn't be arsed with that manipulation.

'No I won't let you call him that because it isn't his bloody name'

So pack it in right now or you won't get to spend any time with him

Read the OP's posts.

She's calling him Elon

I would:

1. Have another conversation with her, stay calm but very clearly state that his name is X and that she is to stop calling him other names immediately.
2. If she continues to call him another name, correct her every single time. His name is X, do not call him Y.
3. If that still continues I would call her by different names all the time. Doris, please pass the salt. Edna, did you see the documentary on the BBC last night? Brenda, how's your neighbour doing after his operation?

In that case @Cheesybashful , I would sound the alarm bells and get your mum in to see the GP ASAP (get her in by saying you need her to prove nothing wrong with her and by seeing the GP and having tests she can prove this, because certainly she'll deny it) and if it is early dementia see if she can have one of these early intervention drugs that have recently been invented.

She's just being a dick - let her call him the wrong name because as soon as he is old enough to tell her - he will. And it will sting more from him!

Well the answer is to start calling her Murgatroyd or Ethel or something and tell her they're names you like.

From your description of her new general behaviour I would think there are cognitive issues beginning to appear. My relative has diagnosed early dementia symptoms which sound very similar. It's obsessive behaviour.

Hi OP, how old is your mum? I'll be honest this update makes me think there are some neurological changes going on. Personality changes, behavioural changes, defensiveness, forgetfulness. The name thing over your son if frankly bizarre, even if she has always been a bit "quirky". Might want to start gently encouraging her to see her GP.

Absolutely this. Ignore the jokers on here who are suggesting you confuse her further and try to persuade her to see her GP.

It's a bit weird, I wonder if she is struggling to remember their actual names.

We have the opposite problem we have a grandson named Oscar but we have been instructed to cell him Ozzy!

How come that's a 'problem'? I don't think it's unusual for someone to have a full name but be called a shorter version in everyday life?

I find it strange on here that lots of grandparents take issue with their grandchildren's names.

My mum did this with my child who she helped look after from a baby. Calling her a nickname that is stupid (think a type of fruit) and telling her it was her name, to the extent my child wanted to be called this name for about 4 years in school, and was known by that name to everyone. Annoyed me so much,. It felt like my mum was trying to exert some control, i suspect she is a narc.

Sorry, but your DM is being downright rude and disrespectful. When she calls your DC by the wrong name, correct her - every single time. Tell her she’s being rude. I guarantee she’ll want to see her DGC more than she wants to insist in a wrong name, so just say casually that you don’t want your child growing up not knowing his own name, so if she can’t remember what it is, unfortunately you won’t be able to let her see him. She really won’t want that!

I think just let her crack on. Just like a child - ignore the bad behaviour and she will get bored when you don't react.

If she continues, she'll just make herself look foolish to everyone around her.

Sounds like the onset of dementia. Definitely not normal.

Have you named your child something weird like 'Bean' or 'Ocean' and she isnt keen?

My mother has always given my child the surname of my ex even though corrected all the time. She addresses post with the wrong surname🙄 my son is in his twenties now and before his birthday I have to “remind” her to put the correct name on the envelope.
she doesn’t like my husband I don’t think and prefers my ex so I think this is her being a bitc*

What a nutcase.

Have you tried calling her different random names to see how she likes it? I'd go a couple of generations older, like Mavis or Ethel.

I'd consider it a serious insult if anyone linked my son or grandsons to Elon Musk. The man's a complete tw@t. His bromance with Donald Trump is seriously worrying. He may be successful financially but he's flawed human being.

I'd worry if my M-I-L was thinking that I'd be happy t the name association.

Time to quietly pull her aside and say what you expect namewise ... NO exceptions.

My brother and sister-in-law used to pounce on people who called my nephew anything but his christened "Stephen" ... no exceptions. If anyone tried Stevie or Steve or Steph/Stef, they were diverted firmly.

Mind you, now that Stephen is 40, he invites most relatives and frinds to call him Steve ... BUT it's HIS choice, NOT the underminng of someone else.

I’d say something like “Mum I’m a bit concerned about your memory as you keep calling baby by the wrong name. I think you should make an appointment with your GP to get it checked out. I’ll come with you.” That should stop it.

As other posters have said if she’s calling him completely different names - not cutie pie or whatever it sounds like she’s having memory/confusion issues. Has she done anything similar in the past to deliberately annoy you? If so it may be cognitive problems which she probably doesn’t want to admit/is in denial. I’d see if she was open to going to GP

🤣🤣🤣

madness!
is she ok though? I mean, does she remember well or try to hide that she doesn’t…

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