Mum not coming on Halloween - irked?

[CleverAzureDreamer]

My mum has just let me know she’s having her hair done on Thursday evening next week so she won’t be coming over to ours to go trick or treating and watch a spooky movie with the kids (8, 10, 12). I’m slightly irritated by this as I thought it would have been nice to have a family night dressed up and go round taking the kids trick or treating.
I’ve allowed older DS to bring a friend over to come with us so it won’t be so empty but I just found it a bit selfish for a Nan to not want to spend Halloween with the grandkids! AIBU?

You are being unreasonable. I can’t imagine Halloween is very interesting for her and it’s pretty irrelevant

Are you serious?

I wouldn’t prioritise Halloween as it’s bs.

Wouldn’t have thought of involving Granny in Halloween.
Maybe it didn’t occur to her, either? Did you invite her?

@Widowtoo It’s family time? Last year we had fun.

I'm calling reverse on this one. Surely no-one is that bothered about Halloween

Is this something you have been doing every year and it's always been a family thing she's enjoyed being part of?

Nope, never heard of Halloween being a family event.

You wanted your mum to dress up and go knocking on doors? Can't be serious.

Why is it selfish for your mother not to want to traipse around the streets trick or treating, then watch a 'spooky movie'? You've been watching too many US TV programmes!

That's a coincidence, I'm having my hair done on Halloween evening as well. Didn't think about what I'll miss out on because it's all bloody nonsense and I, like most adults, can't even pretend to be interested in it.

Unless you'd previously asked her and she'd agreed and is now changing her mind, which would be a bit tight but not unacceptable then you are being totally unreasonable.

Halloween isn't a thing at all for loads of people and even if it is a thing it's definitely not a day anyone would assume is a big family event.

She has come every year before. I don’t understand why adults can’t enjoy festivals like Halloween, Easter and even Christmas to a certain extent?

OP, are you seriously annoyed because your mother doesn't want to spend an evening trailing around the streets with her grandchildren plus friend, knocking on random doors trick or treating in the dark, dressed as ghost/skeleton/whatever???
Yes, you're being unreasonable!

Jeez I love my DGS more than anything but would not want to go out on a cold night trick or treating with him. It’s just for the kids isn’t it? I’m sure they’ll have a great time even if Nana isn’t there!

As a gran to 5 children, I couldn't think of much worse than trudging around the street on a cold and possibly wet evening, doing Trick or Treat. Halloween wasn't really anything to celebrate in our day, and isn't in the slightest bit interesting to anyone but children and over-excitable Americans 😂

Seriously? Get a life. Enjoy and look after your kids yourself.

I think as a grandparent, going once is nice, but shouldn't be expected to attend every year. Did you explicitly ask in advance? Halloween isn't am 'extended family' event in the same way that Christmas and Easter are traditionally.

You are being completely ridiculous.

If you are old enough to have children yourself, you do not need your mum to hold your hand for Halloween.

No, it's not selfish for a nan to do her own things for Halloween. It's selfish of YOU to expect her to have to get involved.

If you want adult company, organise a party and invite your own friends. Leave your mother be.

Personally, I'm glad my dc are at their dad's on Halloween so I don't have to get involved, don't blame your dm in the slightest for finding a good reason to avoid!

Why can’t you just celebrate it the same with your kids and partner?

Having her hair done in the Evening? More likely going out on her broomstick.

Is this a reverse and your daughter is giving you shit for not coming?

They can enjoy them. But they don't have to, and certainly don't have to be expected to. And Halloween isn't anything like Christmas in terms of expectations of spending time together. You're trying to make it into a thing that it just isn't.

Aren’t they a bit old to be trick or treating?
Yabu about your mum.