To ask if you trust men, including your partner/husband?

[YourGreenJoker]

I’ve been reflecting a lot on trust in relationships lately, and it got me wondering about how people view trust specifically when it comes to men - whether in romantic relationships, friendships, or just in general.

Do you trust men, including your partner/husband? Have past experiences made you more cautious, or do you naturally trust until given a reason not to? I feel like society often sends mixed messages about men and trust, and I wonder how other people navigate that.

For those in relationships, has your trust ever been tested, and if so, how did you rebuild it? Or, if you’ve always had full trust, what do you think contributes to that dynamic?

How do you personally handle trust with men in your life?

I trust my husband more than any other man and I always will. I trust my father and my 2 brothers a lot as well. I trust my male friends too. Honestly, I don't view my trust for them as different to the trust I have for women? They are my people.

Generally, hmm. I think I am quite wary but it depends on how I perceive them. Naturally, I think I'll be more cautious around male strangers compared to women but this isn't due to past experiences, just how society has made me feel I suppose. I definitely don't trust until given a reason not to. Trust has to be built.

My trust with my husband has never been tested. Always had full trust and I think it is because we have always been honest with each other and I have simply doubted our true love for each other.

I never trust anyone until I know them properly- and this includes women just as much as men. Those already in my circle I trust implicitly.

No, not DH or any man.

No. I don't trust women either though.

I trust my DH and my grandad.

I don’t trust most of the men I’ve met in my life.

When it comes down to it, No.

I think the trust in partners is different from the trust in fathers/sons/friends/brothers because I think the main reason we trust people is we believe they love/care for us enough not to harm us. The difference between partners and other men is that their love and care is conditional and often transitory. So, while we can trust a good father for all of his life, we can trust our partner only as long as we retain his love. And with 50% of marriages failing, which doesn't take into account the non married relationships that fail, the odds are not the best. So I guess the best we can say with confidence is I trust him at the moment.

@Redruns i think that’s very true, my DH is awful for embellishing stories, drives me nuts but I do trust him on all the big things.

With other men I trust vibes. I’ve had two big betrayals in my life, both men, neither directly attacked me, but I was in the fall out. The one I was closet with definitely changed and gave off bad vibes the last time I saw him.

I trust my DH a lot. But not men in general. Depends on the men.

Men put their penis above everything else. A lot of them can be nice enough most of the time, but if the right circumstances present themselves their penis comes first (so to speak). They will tear their family apart, some will rape or kill. They are a slave to what their penis wants.

I trust my sons, my dad and my husband because they’ve never given me any cause not to. I don’t trust easily though and I do think there are many men that aren’t trustworthy. Same can be said about many women though too

I’ve yet to have a relationship with a trustworthy man, hence why I’ve remained single for many years. The men in my immediate family - brother, bil, father are extremely loyal and trustworthy. So I know there are good ones, but I cba looking for one anymore.

I trust my DH and my sons, that's it.

I'm sure there are plenty of trustworthy men out there, but unless I've been with them day in, day out for 25 years (DH) or given birth to them, then I wouldn't be confident enough to trust them on every level.

I trust them in the way I trust any other human by which I mean I don’t cause issues due to mistrust where it’s unwarranted or deliberately expect toxicity

BUT have seen enough and been treated badly enough by men (in some of the worst ways imaginable by men) and women to know that no human is ever completely trustworthy and due to my previous experiences I have had to learn and in some other ways relearn boundaries and now I keep good strong boundaries.

i know that nobody gets to stay in my life if they break them because I don’t actually need anyone else even though I appreciate the people I have but have no qualms getting rid of someone even someone I loved very deeply if they proved themselves to be someone who didn’t deserve a space in my life.

i hope that won’t be the case and believe from how I am treated by the people in my life that it most likely won’t but I am ready if it is. Not in a narcissistic way but no one is more important than me.

in terms of strangers though no I don’t but not in a way that would affect interactions with them, I don’t think of trust as something that should be automatic. It I also don’t immediately assume all strangers are untrustworthy either though if that makes sense?

saying all that, while i believe everything I’ve said is true. In terms of danger I have seen and know too much to believe we as women especially are safe so I am cautious and ready for the possibility that I could be unsafe. It’s most likely that if I find myself in a situation like that it will be a man who is going to be the perpetrator so that makes me more likely to try (as we all know there is never a guarantee) not be in a position to be attacked and am more concerned about men as a danger threat than women

Are we talking about sexual fidelity here? Well, I do trust my husband, but at the same time, I think you can never be 100% sure about anyone! People have an inner world and sexual desires we know nothing about.
I'm fine with this to be honest. It's not something I worry about. If he cheated I'd deal with it at the time. I'm not going to lose sleep over the what ifs.

I don’t trust anyone! But at the same time I’m not mistrustful, but everyone is capable of lying and shitting on someone else.

Only trust my dad

I trust some men and some women, but definitely don’t trust people in general. Plenty of men and women are CF, lying cheats, tax frauds, narcissists and manipulators. I’ve been played and hurt plenty by both.

I don't trust anyone until they've shown me that they can be trusted. But if it came down to choice, I would trust a woman before I'd trust a man.

As for personal experience...I've been abused by my ex-boyfriend, my exH, my Dad, my Uncle, my Brother, and two male friends (on separate occassions). Oh, also a rather easily angered male neighbour. I also was the victim of a violent break in, and the person who broke in was a man.
Out of the females in my life, I've been abused by my Mum.

Don’t have a husband, do trust most men I know. I have to know people to trust them - men and women. But one has to have faith in humanity otherwise life with be too miserable.

I used to but the day my husband proved even he couldn’t be trusted I lost all faith I’m afraid

@BigFatLiar no I wouldn't care really. I trust him in most aspects but never trust that he may get bored of me / our relationship or find someone he thinks is 'better'. I've seen it happen way too many times to be naive and think it could never happen to me. I know I'm not the only attractive person in the world to him - that would just be telling myself shit to feel better. It's human nature to find people attractive, it's about the respect and loyalty you have for your partner to not act on that and think of your wife as the best of the best

If I asked him, I could almost guarantee that he'd say he trusts me in most other aspects but don't trust that id never leave him or find someone else. You can never know..

Both our parents are divorced so perhaps that shapes our outlook on it. However not having trust that we'll be together forever and neither of us will wander does not affect me or our relationship at all. I don't dwell on it or give it many thoughts, I'll deal with it if it came to it I don't have time to worry about something that's not happened and may never happen.

Thats plain weird.

In all honesty I don't trust anyone 10000% women or men. Maybe that's sad or I've got issues but hey ho it's not a problem for me and I don't care enough.

It’s called pattern recognition, it’s a useful skill.