to be disappointed in this newborn present?

[mysticalgardens]

Friends of ours had their 1st baby a couple of months ago around the same time we had our 3rd baby.

Because it was their first child, I put great effort in buying them an amazing gift. I spent well over 100 pounds and put gifts in the box for the baby as well as the new mom and dad (think of nice tea, hot chocolate and soap and glory stuff for her)

I didn't expect them to reciprocate this, I know not everyone has the money available to spend so much time on a gift.

However, when they came over, she gave
me a bag from Shein. When I opened it it had the most disgusting plastic polyester smell. It contained a pink towel and a pink body suit for my baby girl that were made out of really cheap polyester material.

It smelled so bad that I threw it away after they had left.

My sister is due to have her 3rd child at the end of November. She already has a lot, but I bought her some nice socks, body suits and trousers for the baby from Asda (George). The stuff is really lovely and was inexpensive.

So I know that nice baby clothes don't have to cost a lot at all.

AIBU to be a bit disappointed that they made 0 effort when choosing their present?

Maybe they did, not what you hoped for

I would not use anything bought from SHEIN myself.

Oh gosh, I don't think I've ever bought someone having their third baby a present at all! Maybe a bottle of prosecco or a bunch of flowers and a card. I'd assume you had everything you practically needed from the first two.

I mean the Shein stuff sounds like not my sort of thing but everyone has different tastes so maybe they thought it was nice?

Maybe they’ve used shein with no issues before? You didn’t like it which is fair enough but it doesn’t mean they didn’t put any effort in.

Some clothes is a standard baby present. And if they're new parents they're probably not in the headspace to rebuy a gift if the one ordered was poorer quality than ideal.
Your gift to them is definitely more of a 1st child/brand new parents style with treats for them. By your third child no ones thinking about how you adjust to parenting.

It was months ago. Get over it and stop focusing on the monetary value of everything.

Your post does come across as snobby.

You not liking it doesn't mean they didn't put anything thought into it.

Also as generous as you've been if I'm honest a friend spending £100 on a present for me would make me feel very uncomfortable.

You dont give to receive. They bought you something and persumably you don't think they went out of their way to get something you wouldn't like. So let it go.

You didn’t expect them to reciprocate. You don’t sound very nice to be honest

Out of interest can you remember if they gave you nice gifts for babies 1 and 2? I’ve had friends who’ve had 3 and I’ve not really given anything for the third especially if I’ve given nice things previously. All babies are special but realistically people aren’t going to make a huge fuss over a third a token gift seems fine.

not a great gift but if they were thrown in the deepend with their first newborn she might not have had been in the best headspace for gift buying. And some people just aren’t great at gifts even at the best of times. If she’s a good friend I don’t think it’s worth dwelling on, especially months later.

You sound very ungrateful.

I don’t like stuff from places like Shein either & would never shop there but plenty of people do.

Personally I don’t even tend to bother with gifts for 3rd or 4th babies so I think it’s sweet she got you a gift at all.

Your gift to her sounds lovely but £100 is excessive (unless family or very very best friend ) so you can’t expect people to spend that back.

Most of my social circle are pretty well off but most spend maybe £20 on a baby gift

Your first and primary error was spending £100+ in the first place, it was never going to be reciprocated. Once bitten, twice shy.

This

Maybe it was something they were given themselves and wanted shot of.

I wouldn't have binned it though - we have in our town a baby bank, food bank, community cupboard, for example. I know Shein is crap in all sorts of ways, though, so I wouldn't blame you for feeling a bit disappointed that they might have thought you'd like or appreciate it. Being honest, I know that I wouldn't.

Oh fgs, move on and quit being ridiculous.

If your other two children are boys then I would be more likely to get a 'girly' present for your daughter as obviously you might have no pink stuff to hand down to this baby. But I think a third baby doesn't generally get a lot of presents.

Maybe they just didn’t have the money to buy anything else but felt they couldn’t turn up empty handed due to your gift. Also if they feel comfortable dressing their baby in shein, they may not have considered you wouldn’t. I didn’t have much money to buy gifts when my kids were babies, we had just enough to make it through maternity leave.

Lots of people don't bother at all with baby socks- how would you feel if YOUR gift was judged as zero effort? It isn't very nice is it. A good gift is a subjective and perhaps the shein thing was bought with good intentions. If it's not to your taste then just move on, a mumsnet thread is OTT.

Some people don't even get a healthy baby at the end of the pregnancy so count your blessings.

Seen as you asked: Yes YABU. Your attitude is awful to be honest and more fool you for spending £100+ to expect a similar present in return (which is what it sounds like seen as you told us how much you spent on them when it actually has nothing to do with it unless you expect the same back). How mercenary.

Baby #3 barely rates a packet of bibs in my experience.

YABU.

As well you know, it’s the thought that counts.

£100 on a new baby gift is a lot IMO.

More fool you for spending so much on a gift for anyone. Call me tight but my family have an agreement not to send £20 on each other.

Go get a hobby, OP.