To say no when asked if sibling can come to party?

[PurplePetalPip]

Hosting DS's 3rd birthday party at the weekend. It's the first birthday we've invited a few nursery friends to. I'm completely bonkers and decided to do it in our garden as thought the weather would be nice enough for a bouncy castle etc.

All in all there are 10 children coming. All around 3. One of the mums has just messaged asking if their son's sister can come too as she has no one to watch her. Sister is nearly 5 I believe.

If we were in a hall I'd probably agree but AIBU to say no in this case? I'm already stressing over having ten 3 year olds running around the garden. There will be additional adults there in grandparents and aunty and realistically one extra child won't take up much room but I just feel like it's cheeky and changes the dynamics. They were very late in responding to the invite - only knew they were coming 2 weeks ago and no mention of additional child then.

If I say sorry, due to space we can't accommodate, I won't really mind if she says the boy can't come then. The issue would be if it's awkward she miraculously finds childcare and comes along!

Seems churlish to say no to the other sibling. Parents will stay I would assume for all the kids

I would say no. She's a bit of a cf for asking actually! Just say that as it's at home you're limited with space and leave it at that.

You could always say she doesn't need to stay and you'll look after her 3 year old at the party.

I'd say no purely on the basis of not asking upfront.

Its fine to say no and its fine for her to say they can't come
Some people may say its just 1 more but if all the kids brought a sibling it would be very difficult
At least the Mum actually asked, one at DC school had form for turning up with 3 kids no matter who was invited and if there was an organised activity they couldn't join in the other kids would just sit there looking sad, they usually had to be prevented from grabbing a party bags too - although people usually gave them one if there was a spare.

I think it’s fine to say no to siblings in this circumstance. It’s your home so if there is not enough space, then there’s not enough space.
Yes, the one 5yo won’t take up much space but what if other siblings wish to find too?

She was maybe waiting to see if anyone could watch the sibling.

I’d say no OP. I also don’t think it’s awkward. Just say no.

It's a request, not a demand. It's absolutely fine to say no. You can just respond 'no, sorry, thanks for checking'.

Cheeky of them to wait this late to ask honestly, but regardless it's your party, you can invite and decline anyone you like.

Why can't you accommodate another child? Presumably the other parents will stay, people don't tend to leave 3 year olds at parties unless they are very confident. This parent is clearly not intending to drop and run, but maybe make it clear in your reply that she needs to to stay if the sibling comes.
I once had a party for a 6 year old when every single invitee brought a sibling with them, mostly with no notice, and every parent dropped and ran!
It's fine, it's a party, one more isn't going to change the dynamics, and they might even be helpful.

I would say no, there is to much lately asking if siblings can come. My daughter had a swimming party, all the children who came could swim. Someone asked if sibling could come, she said yes, found out this child could not swim and she had to make arrangements for him.
I honestly think this us cheeky. I would not feel guilty saying no.

You're right and this is one of the reasons I wanted to ask on here... to get a feel if I was just being a bit spiteful at being asked!

Hmm... will pass on that option thank you

Shame the 3 year old has to miss out because of childcare. I'd say yes but I'm a soft touch. Surely all the parents will stay anyway.

Answer "I'm afraid not, I understand if you cannot make it"
That's it.

I think it’s mean to say no. What difference will one 5 yr old make? A few kids might not turn up. I would just say ‘sure no probs’. The fact it’s in your garden gives you even more flexibility. She probably won’t be able to come now, which I know you don’t mind, but bloody hell, it’s a bit pedantic.

I'd say no, what if everyone wants to bring siblings? Invites are for party children only

Sorry, but there just isn't enough space for any more children. I hope [inserted invited child] can still make it but understand if you have to cancel - let me know.

I would say yes. I always expected a stray sibling.

Life is too short to be so tight IMO. They might be a future best friend!

At 3yrs the parents will be expecting to stay, not drop off, in which case she can manage her 5yo herself. I think I would allow (if the mum was staying)

And I wouldn't consider her response particularly late, if she did so with 2+ weeks notice. I don't find this rude.

My only concern would be how much taller this child was in comparison to the 3 year olds. On a bouncy castle for 3 year olds you need them all to be about the same height roughly.

She doesn't have to pick one!

Here in the real world / planet earth it does sound childish / spiteful to say no. I appreciate on Universe Mumsnet it's normal to rarely accommodate anyone.

No you are right I forgot to add the or be selfish and petty option instead.