To be so fucking angry. How many more women and children must die?

[Kianai]

I'd almost become numb to it, with all the news so far this year.

Murder after murder of women and their children. Noone ever seeming to link the common denominator. NAMALT.

This latest one today, I feel like something is beginning to snap inside me. Three babies and a young woman dead, because of a fucking man. Again. And again.

news.sky.com/story/police-launch-murder-investigation-after-woman-and-three-children-die-in-house-fire-in-bradford-13200678

Agree. It’s utterly sickening, inhumane and cowardly. The raging entitlement to extinguish women and children’s lives.
Again.

Totally agree. It's just constant - there was another domestic stabbing the other day too.

I remember the Epsom College murders a little while back. Before it was all confirmed, it was being discussed in the office and I said 'of course, it will be the husband, always is'. Everyone looked at me like I had three heads - totally oblivious to how endemic this is and as if I was being somehow outrageously anti-men. Not all men, but ALWAYS a man.

NAMALT What does this mean please?

Not All Men Are Like This.

See also, Not My Nigel.

I was speaking to my friends about this and saying how the "protests" (riots) should have been every woman and girl in this country demanding that they can be safe from male violence. It should have been women on the streets forcing people to listen. As a newly ish single woman with 3 daughters I worry that all it takes is a break up for your life to be in danger. It makes me so angry

And yes, this is so common, there's even a phrase for it:

Family annihilator.

Just awful.

Absolutely. And the recent event where the ambulance driver killed his partner. Initial news reports said “unexplained” ha we knew it would be what it always was, a poor woman losing her life at the hands of a violent man.

Bloody hell!!
Is this genuinely “a phrase” for this?? Never heard that before… how awful that there is now a name for this vile behaviour.
I am also in agreement with those who say that every time they hear of another murder / rape / assault immediately think ‘it’s the husband or partner’ Because it usually is..😥

I wish we would go back to more obviously public and open feminism - Reclaim the Night, Reclaim the Streets, etc.

I sometimes find it really difficult to be nice to the men in my life because the headlines are so full of other terrible men.

I worry constantly for DD, in a way I do not for DS. It's unfair.

I also don't think men understand female fear. They may think they do, and spout some nonsense about being "allies" but they don't really.

There is an interesting study on mental illness and parents killing their children.
Filicide: Mental Illness in Those Who Kill Their Children

”6144 people were convicted of homicide, 297 were filicides, and 45 cases were filicide-suicides. 195 (66%) perpetrators were fathers. Mothers were more likely than fathers to have a history of mental disorder (66% v 27%) and symptoms at the time of the offence (53% v 23%), most often affective disorder. 17% of mothers had schizophrenia or other delusional disorders. Overall 8% had schizophrenia. 37% were mentally ill at the time of the offence. 20% had previously been in contact with mental health services, 12% within a year of the offence.
Conclusion
In the majority of cases, mental illness was not a feature of filicide. However, young mothers and parents with severe mental illness, especially affective and personality disorder who are providing care for children, require careful monitoring by mental health and other support services. Identifying risk factors for filicide requires further research.”

”All filicide and filicide-suicide cases in England and Wales (1997–2006) were drawn from a national index of homicide perpetrators.”

“Overall, a significantly higher proportion of fathers than mothers were convicted of filicide; a male to female ratio = 2∶1.”
https://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0058981

I wonder if the dire state of mental health care in NHS is making the violence worse?

@SugarandSpiceandAllThingsNaice in cases like this, no. It's the idea that women and children only exist to suit men and if they no longer are willing to do that role, they can be killed. This is no different than Hunt killings or the many acid attacks etc. It's male entitlement.

I’m sorry, I don’t quite get what you mean.

The study concluded for most men who killed family (77%) mental illness was not a factor.

Are you saying “no, not in cases like this” as in, male entitlement is a form of mental illness?

Interesting perspective to say the least.

edited to add, or are you saying “no” to the idea that lack of mental health care from 2013 to 2024 would not increase the number (27% in 2013) of cases that are linked to mental illness? If so why?

I'm not sure it is always a man.

This study seems to suggest 17% are women.

https://www.wired.com/story/family-killers/

That seems very high to me as I can't remember one!

NAMALT but almost all people like that are MEN. This is a fact.

I have NEVER heard a woman become 'outraged' because another women does something grotesque but the fact OP felt the need to tell us "not all men" says it all. Even here, on a women's forum, we must bow and scrape eh and be polite to the aggressive fuckers.

They don't tend to kill the man: https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/evil-monster-mums-who-killed-20874464

Fuck sake.

We all know that male violence against women and girls is at epidemic levels (probably always has been, there's just more reporting now).

The excellent work of Prof Jane Monckton-Smith shows very clearly the homicide timeline of men who kill women, and their children.

It's horrific, yet predictable and very clear.

Until this evidence is accepted and measures taken to protect women and children and lock up these evil, weak bastards, then we will continue to see hundreds of women and children being murdered by pathetic, insecure, controlling men.

It's terrifying. 2 women a week are killed in the UK by a partner or ex partner.

But does the government really care to do anything? No because majority of senior people in this country are men and it doesn't affect them

The rules of misogyny explain it all quite well, I feel:

1. Women are responsible for what men do.

1. Women saying no to men is a hate crime.

1. Women speaking for themselves are exclusionary and selfish.

1. Women’s opinions are violence against men, thus male violence against women is justified.

1. Women and Feminism must be useful to men or they are worthless.

1. Women who go around being female AT men by menstruating and breastfeeding babies deserve punishment.

1. Women should always be grateful to men for everything.

1. Men are whatever men say they are and women are whatever men say they are.

1. Men always know the “real reasons” for everything women do and say.

10. The worst thing about male violence is that it makes men look bad.

11. Whatever women suffer from, it is worse when it happens to men.

12. Women’s ability to recognise male behaviour patterns is misandry.

13. Angry women are crazy. Angry men have trouble expressing themselves.

14. Women have all the rights they need: The right to remain silent.

15. Men are the default human. Women are strange subhuman others.

16. Everyone owns and controls women’s bodies except the women themselves.

What measures would work to protect women and children?

@AmandaHoldensLips
Yes, there is a well researched and documented profile for men who kill their family and that does need to be used by police instead of their usual fob off all women reporting DV or stalking by an ex. It is shocking how all the tools are there, the women in danger are usually reporting concern months or weeks before they and their kids are murdered- the police just need to listen to women and apply this profile when they assess risk.

There is a well known 8-stage pattern of behaviour.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-49481998

Thank you.
That link is very helpful.

More can and should be done. I feel that women and children are being failed by ths system.

Things won’t change unless society changes.