He said if I don't trust him enough to do this then ....

[Springstomind]

Partner has been asking me to send him a naked photo of myself. We have been together for a year, we don't live together. He says I want "my photo" and brings it up a lot. I have been brushing it off etc and recently told him that I don't want to risk a naked photo of myself to get out in the public as you just never know these days.
His response was that if I don't trust him with a naked photo of myself then I shouldn't trust him enough to have sex with.

Aibu?

Nailed it!

Tell him if he doesn’t respect you enough to accept your choice he doesn’t respect you enough for you to want sex with him.

Hahah id play games with him!

i used to like sending my arm crease and pretend it was my bum....or nude lipsticks #nudes

Dont trust a bloke like this he probably has a whole collection saved in his phone of the other women! Dick head!!

I've been with my DH 24 years and trust him with my life, he still doesn't have any naked pics of me.

1 - he can see me naked in real life
2 - once a picture exists in the digital world, even if it's never sent to anyone and just lives on your phone, it's vulnerable like if you lost your phone or it was hacked. If it's sent to someone done then there's even more risk.
3 - it's not something I would feel comfortable doing and that would be the end of it.

He's pushing on this and it's not acceptable, you are allowed to have boundaries and they should be respected.

Very good.

People who won't take no for an answer aren't safe people.
Get rid.
Enjoy a better future 💐

“His response was that if I don't trust him with a naked photo of myself then I shouldn't trust him enough to have sex with.”

If he doesn’t respect you enough to honour your (very reasonable) boundaries, he doesn’t respect you enough to be having sex with you.

Plus, it’s not just about trusting him - there may be all sorts of scenarios beyond your control (e.g. phone gets lost, borrowed or stolen, cloud access or phone remote access from scammers/hackers), unlikely I know, but probably not worth the risk. But you don’t owe him any reason. A “no” should be enough.

The request is by the by. The issue is the pestering you for the picture inspite of you saying no. Get rid.

I would dump him for being coercive and trust him no more.
Please do not send him a picture, please dump him.

You send him a picture and all his friends will see it. What man does that.

🏃‍♀️🚩🚩

"my photo" he makes it sound like he owns your body. Huge red flag. I would bin him.

These ultimatums are the red flag- similar to if you don't have anal / put him on the mortgage / quit your job

Don't do it - he wants leverage, he wants blackmail material, just don't

No don't send it. Once he has it it can go anywhere. It's your right to make that choice don't be made to feel bad. He sounds like a wrongun

Yes. Tell him he’s completely correct.

I hope you have a great whats-left-of-summer as a single woman without this prick of a millstone round your neck, and a great dating future with people who understand consent 💕

If you loved me enough you'd do anal.

How does that sound? It's the same thing. Emotional blackmail and abusive, coercive bullshit.

Bin, bin, bin.

What kind of a loser asks for that, let alone repeatedly demands???

Raise your standards, please.

Better to be alone than with such an arsehole.

Tell him that yes, since he's being so pushy about it, you definitely don't trust him.

Then dump the twat.

Get rid, sending nudes is not a good idea, one doesn't have control over them once they're sent.
He isn't being respectful of your boundaries.

How does this not give you the ick?!

Nasty nasty man!

he just told you-
not to sleep with him
and
no more sex

Bye

Your body is yours and yours alone. If you aren't comfortable with the idea of nude photos then don't do it. Once that image has been sent, there is no knowing where it will end up, whether that be deliberately or accidentally.

He is being manipulative and coercive by trying to guilt you into doing something you don't feel comfortable with.

Not respecting my personal choices would be a deal breaker for me.

He is so manipulative! Tell him to bugger off!

Trust aside, phones can be hacked, images can find their way into the wrong hands more easily than people think. Why would he want you exposed to that?

More importantly, you don't want to. Simple. Throw it back at him, if he doesn't trust that you're secure with him without doing this test, then he doesnt trust your relationship either. So gross, sorry you're having to face this dilemma he has created.

Most men would never push you into doing something you are uncomfortable with.

This is a huge 🚩
He is pushing your boundaries.

People send nudes because they want to and not because they feel forced or guilt tripped into doing it.