To take a phone call when food is ready?

[garlicgirl]

Was I being unreasonable?

My dp was cooking us a nice dinner. Laid the table, home cooked food etc.

About five mins before food was ready, my 80 year old mum called me. She was firstly telling me about her doctors appointment and health issues. Then she went on to ask for help about something in her house. It took me a long time to explain to her how to fix something.

So dp had brought the food into the dining room (open plan with living room) when I sat on the sofa and spoke to mum. I told dp to just start eating.

By the time I’d finished my conversation with mum, he’d finished his dinner on his own and went off in a huff that the phone call could have waited until after the meal he’d made for us to eat together.

Okay Karen...

@HelmholtzWatson I suggest you stop with the extremely sexist comments.

To be honest, I now think you are your disrespectful spouse, who you just want to please (my arse, she walks all over you), are well suited.

I think you came on here, trying to convince people that you were such a ""great and decent" man, you just wanted a happy partner.

The Karen comment shows that very quickly your facade has fallen and you're actually misogynistic and sexist.

Move on now....

Whatever.

My DH pulls this shit all the time and it drives me up the fucking wall, so rude. He sees me serving up and then disappears for 20 minutes.

"OK Karen" and "Whatever"...........such well reasoned and intelligent responses 🙄

What an intelligent response.......

You're showing yourself up more and more....

Exactly!

🙄

It is rude, I'd eat mine and leave his to get cold.

"Sorry Mum, can I call you back in half an hour our dinner is ready"

Problem solved

Very rude Indeed.

Yes it is. I’m not one to sweat the small stuff but I would find that incredibly rude. Of course you’re within your rights to not think it’s rude of your partner but I would not be accepting of this. If a call is extremely important, of course that’s different, but not just some bad mannered habit.

Very rude.

you should have ignored or just picked up to say - I’m about to eat so will call you back later.

I see that @garlicgirl didn't get the responses they were hoping for, and haven't come back to the thread!

Are you related to my Mil, she will call continuously until we answer just to wang on about absolute shite. DH will say ‘I’m at my dinner can I call you back!’ Just to try and get her off the phone, then she asks what we’re having tells him what she’s having and starts gabbing shite again, choices are listening to her while you eat and getting indigestion, ignoring her continuous calls (she’ll try my number then and I have a mother who is frail so I keep my phone on)or hanging up which is rude. We ignored the phone once as we were busy and she called 39 times in a row! She thinks nothing of calling at 5am to tell us nothing much!

DH has tried that with mil, it doesn’t work. She’ll ask about what we’re having, tell us what she’s having, start taking about Morrisons and she still gabbing 20 minutes later. We can’t not answer as she’ll just call constantly until she gets an answer. She also tries my number and as my mum is frail i keep my phone on in case she uses her alert button.

That would drive me demented! I’d have to switch to airplane mode. And set boundaries, pronto.

We have a rule where if we call each other once, we call back when convenient. If it’s twice, it requires an urgent call back. Works well for us!

put your phone on silent with caller ID activated?

"hi Mum, I'm sitting at the table in the middle of a meal with my husband, can I call you back in two hours? thanks" (once I've established it's not an emergency).

Your DP is right.

Personally I think that’s really quite rude. Somebody has spent time preparing home cooked food for you and you can’t even be bothered to politely tell your Mum you’ll call her back.

100% this

Its incredibly rude not to come and eat a dinner someone had cooked for you with that person.

And I’m sure someone of your Mum’s generation would know that!

It was ages ago. The food will be stone cold and the conversation over long ago.

My husband does this all the time with work calls and it makes me rage! I spend ages cooking a nice meal (I do all the cooking) then have to battle the young kids to come sit down while he fucks off back to his office to do something really important 😡

Put phone down and block her until you have eaten. Soon stops that nonsense

She’ll call continually and start with my phone that I will not turn off as I need to be contactable in case my mother falls as her alert system will call me.

You can just block the MIL number so everyone else can get through. Even using do not disturb you could make your mums number and exception so she can get through always