Would this annoy you- husband - plane seats

[airc]

We went away recently, 3 hour flight.

It turned out our seats were not together.

My husband was on his own at the back and I had two seats, one for me and my 1 year old son on my lap and one for my 3 year old.

When we sat down, I said- don't worry I'll be fine. Let's see how it goes, maybe we can swap. Come and see us when we are up there.

He did not move from his seat once. I saw him go to the toilet. But not ONCE did he come up to our row, ask how we are OR take one of the children.

I was furious.

AIBU ?

One word… cunt

So what excuse did your DH actually give for not bothering to check on you the entire flight??? I'm assuming your 3 year old didn't need the loo or the 1 year old need a nappy change in the 3 hours as you didn't want to bother the lady having to move?

Definitely this or else he's a lazy twat.

What a twat. It cost very little to book all seats on the same row.

Just been on a RyanAir flight and saw a husband in the non-priority queue whilst his wife and child were in the priority queue which one assumes they agreed when booking the flights. Worked well for them i.e. saved a little bit. Didn't see if they ended up seated together but was only one child circa 8 years old. However, sounds like your husband booked the flights/seats and he has deliberately chosen not to sit with you and his children of a much younger age i.e. random seating as opposed to chosen. Next time going on holiday be beside him when he is making the booking or make it yourself as seats can be chosen and paid for at time of booking usually. It is how airlines make money. Yes pre-booking seats costs money but worth it for a family so young - he should have given you the option at booking and helped out when on board. I hope he isn't as selfish other times.

Would 100 percent annoy me to the point I simply wouldn’t allow it to occur.

That's pretty bad, what has he said about it?

I would be bloody furious - but why did you not book your seats ahead?

Have you actually asked him why he didn't come over? What did he say?

Unfortunately,in my experience,this is typical male behaviour.

You know he may have thought the baby would be calmer with mom. And the little kid with the baby. It is not fair to the kids or the passengers to dump both kids intentionally on him. He didn’t know she wanted him to take on of the kids or switch at some point and what point that was cause she didn’t speak up. But now tells tons of people.

Don't over think it. Enjoy yourself. Next time, he gets the kids and you relax.

I think you are right to be furious but I doubt there weren’t signs before.

Some men want to be husbands and fathers and some men want wives and children. There is a difference and your husband sounds like he belongs to the second group.

Eugh.

You said that it turns out the seats were not together but then say you could not reserve seats together? That’s a bit confusing.

Why do you see criticism of one man’s behaviour as “man hating”?

Do you think being a selfish husband is an intrinsic part of being a man? I would argue having such a negative view of men is what is actually “man hating.”

If you’d read my post properly you would know I wasn’t saying men don’t help out or that they shouldn’t. My point was that OP hadn’t made herself clear in what she expected of her DH. And he had taken her at her word.

YANBU, I'd be furious to. It's the pure selfishness of it. I can see my other half doing this. My piss is boiling at the thought

I think a spa day for you is on the cards?

Don't have any more kids with him x

I’m with the lady beside you! This does not bode well … this would be typical of the behaviour of my exH. He was only a father when there was an audience. A total goal hanger who let me do all the work & always took all the glory. DTB!

For you to think people criticising the dh are in the wrong you must be either a selfish man like the OP's dh or a doormat of a woman with low expectations of men.

I know you're back now but it doesn't seem like you've talked about it? Did you ask him about his behaviour?

I’d have gone over and plonked the toddler on his knee and left. Why take both kids. If they want their Mum, fine, but once they’re settled I’d definitely be handing them/one over for a bit.

If there are separate seats going home you get the solo seat so you can relax and watch the movie. DH gets the kids.

Presumably her husband is not an idiot. He “took her at her word” because he did not wish to help out.
Not even checking in with her and the children shows that.

We’ll have to agree to disagree.