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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would this annoy you- husband - plane seats

350 replies

airc · 09/08/2024 07:33

We went away recently, 3 hour flight.

It turned out our seats were not together.

My husband was on his own at the back and I had two seats, one for me and my 1 year old son on my lap and one for my 3 year old.

When we sat down, I said- don't worry I'll be fine. Let's see how it goes, maybe we can swap. Come and see us when we are up there.

He did not move from his seat once. I saw him go to the toilet. But not ONCE did he come up to our row, ask how we are OR take one of the children.

I was furious.

AIBU ?

OP posts:
Temporaryname158 · 09/08/2024 07:35

He has just shown you how much he respects you and how much he cares about you, or his kids.

selfish through and through.

I wouldn’t let this go. I presume you’ll make him have he kids on the return journey?

LlynTegid · 09/08/2024 07:35

I'd be angry, even if not offering to take one of the children, not coming to speak to you all.

DustyLee123 · 09/08/2024 07:36

He’s a twat

SpringleDingle · 09/08/2024 07:37

He can take both on the return leg!!! Miserable fucker.

FinalInstructionstotheAudience · 09/08/2024 07:38

Did you not check the seating arrangements before you left?
Did you (or DH) not ensure you were seated together when you did the online check-in?
If your DH booked seats, perhaps this was no coincidence. After all, he get the best deal. No responsibility for the entire flight
I would be having a word with him. You should be incandescent

Littlemisscapable · 09/08/2024 07:38

I would be soo annoyed. You should have had a child each!!!!! How unfair.

QueenArnica · 09/08/2024 07:38

I would be angry too, that’s selfish and thoughtless and I would definitely say he should do the same on the return journey. Get thy conversation out of the way so you can enjoy your holiday. Have a great time!

RampantIvy · 09/08/2024 07:38

Why couldn't he sit next to the 3 year old and you have the baby on your lap, or he have the baby while you sit with the 3 year old?

Does he not pull his weight in other ways?

Maybe pay to sit together next time?

notacooldad · 09/08/2024 07:38

That is terribly mean of him.
What have you said to him about it?

OhamIreally · 09/08/2024 07:38

No you are not BU. Who booked the flights? Because you can pay to sit together. Did you as a family decide not to pay and just chance it?

I see this on flights all the time. It's always the mum grappling the kids and the man sat elsewhere having a jolly old time on his phone.

Bluesclues1 · 09/08/2024 07:39

It’s such selfish behaviour. But why didn’t you split the children in the first case? He has one and you the other?

Youcancallmeirrelevant · 09/08/2024 07:39

He's an idiot but i think your first response didn't help, you said you would be ok, why even offer that up, you should have said you'll do the first 2hrs for example then he can do the final and you'd sawp on the way back.

Also, how did you not know your seats weren't together? Presuming you didn't pay to reserve seats so got a random allocation but you would have known this at check in

midlifeattheoasis · 09/08/2024 07:39

He's a very selfish man and I would be fucking furious with him

Mybeltsblue · 09/08/2024 07:39

No, you're not being unreasonable. That is awful of him and shows just what he thinks - it's your job to sort the kids. How selfish. I'd be furious OP, and sad. Because it's hard to forgive things when they are so blatant.

Chillyallday · 09/08/2024 07:39

So inconsiderate to not even come
and check you were ok!! Selfish behaviour

BeerForMyHorses · 09/08/2024 07:39

Why didn't one adult take the 1 year old in the single seat and the other adult and child sit in the pair ?

ThePassageOfTime · 09/08/2024 07:40

I'm confused as to why you didn't hand him the baby?

He 100 percent gets both kids on return leg.

What a selfish arse

Essex8888 · 09/08/2024 07:40

How selfish- why didn’t you have a child each

WhatNoRaisins · 09/08/2024 07:40

I'd be very angry, that's just basic sharing, not even complicated.

sunshineandshowers40 · 09/08/2024 07:41

Very selfish. Did he seriously not even walk down to see if you were ok?

Purpleturtle45 · 09/08/2024 07:41

I would be furious too. He should have taken one of the children for sure, unacceptable behaviour!

Onehotday · 09/08/2024 07:41

YABU for a few reasons.

Firstly for not pre-booking your seats. What if they'd all have been separate, you'd have had to ask people who'd paid for their selection to move.

For making a martyr of yourself. Why didn't you just say that you'd have the toddler next to you and he could have the baby with him?

For getting angry about it but not bothering to ask him. If you couldn't get to him a steward would have helped.

Lastly because it was only 3 hours.

BearPear · 09/08/2024 07:42

What an arsehole. I would have taken the one year old to him and gone back to sit with the 3 year old halfway through the flight.

Onehotday · 09/08/2024 07:42

Oh I see the man haters are out in full force this morning 😂

ItsTheGAGGGGGGGG · 09/08/2024 07:42

Littlemisscapable · 09/08/2024 07:38

I would be soo annoyed. You should have had a child each!!!!! How unfair.

I was going to say the same thing. Why didn’t you have a child each? He sounds absolutely awful, I really hate reading things like this. Why the heck wouldn’t he even ask if things were okay? Wow