MIL gifting money to DC

[CiderWithRosy]

We have 5 DC. Ages 28,24,18,16, 9. MIL has gifted the 2 eldest DC 25 grand each. She says the younger 3 DC will be 'sorted out' when she dies (although there is no guarantee of inheritance because money may be needed for care and as far as I know, she has not set out gifting the younger 3 specifically in her will anyway).
One of the elder DC has used his money on a deposit for a flat (which is great). The other older DC is living at her boyfriends house and has no intention to buy.
I'm FULLY aware that it is MIL's money to do as she chooses, however there is a part of me that feels uncomfortable with the arrangement. I'm prepared to get flamed but am I unreasonable to think that MIL deciding to gift the two eldest a little unfair on the younger three?

Have you said thank you?

I haven’t read many of the replies but I assume if able to gift £50k now and planning on gifting to the others possibly in a will, your MiL estate is worth more than £325k and/or more than £500k including her home. She should get legal/tax advice because if she dies within 7 years of a gift that gift is included in the estate for inheritance tax calculations. Gifting to minors under 18 is usually done through a trust with named adult trustees and there will be a cost to the paperwork to do this. Maybe that put her off as it would be be an extra cost on top of the cost or preparing or amending a Will? But I agree also there is a risk of care is needed much of her estate could be used to pay. The threshold at which SS arrange help is less than £23k in assets in total, including the house unless a spouse or dependent relative lives in it. The amount that can’t be touched is £14K. Care fees in South East can easily reach £60k per annum. The fairest thing in my view is create trusts for the younger three now / that is assuming she has £75k free to gift. She can gift £3k per annum free of IHT and regular gifts from income.

on the moral/fairness side, I have had discussions with own DM who thinks my DS children are more spoilt and privilege than her other 6 grandchildren so gifts for birthdays different amounts accordingly and at one point was going to distribute different amounts in her will. My DB & I are uncomfortable with this, we think all should get the same and I pointed out to DM that anything could change between the date of her Will and when it gets put into action. E.g. on the her ‘less spoilt’ grandchildren could get several promotions in his already prestigious job, another might marry someone wealthy, one might win big on the premium bonds. She can’t keep changing her will to make it fair!! From a moral perspective I do think all 5 in this case should get the same benefit otherwise it can cause upset and resentment for life.

DSis not D son

Surely someone who has £50k to give away now is clearly wealthy; so I assume has other saving plus a decent property.
So genuinely the likelihood of them going into care and using up all of their savings is relatively small.
Surely then there will be money left for the other children?

Maybe MIL doesn't have enough money for all 5 GC to receive. You chose to have 5 DC, and there is a large age gap between them.

Think it’s been mentioned that the oldest two are the ops stepchildren. She does say they are bio ‘grandchildren’ not ‘children’.
I assume that this is more about her children losing out rather than an elderly woman doing what she wants with her own money.

Surely that changes things though if the eldest 2 are her biological grandchildren and the youngest 3 aren't? The youngest 3 have another 2 sets of grandparents plus her as a stepgrandmother? Is that right?

No, u have a suspicion that the older 2 are OPs step children.

I think you.l find they can. The cap was never introduced and cancelled by the new government.

Even without the cap people get to keep some of their savings

This is such a difficult subject but OP has possibly not provided the full facts. IF the other posters are correct and the eldest are not hers the situation is much more complicated and the siblings will never inherit the same amounts anyway. The OP will be fully aware of this so her assertion she simply wants fairness and parity is not fully correct.
The fact is the children will find different vocations, will marry into families with wildly different financial circumstances anything can happen with illness, promotions, winnings etc.
It now seems the Grandparent has looked at the current set-up and acted accordingly. Perhaps she is the one resetting to a more equitable balance.

No good deed goes unpunished. Arguably you have been liberated, there’s £50k you don’t need to find to help your 2 eldest. Btw the second eldest should understand that her £25k isn’t going to be replaced by Mum and Dad if she spends it on something other than a deposit for a house. Re the other 3 they are quite a bit younger and perhaps you can plan that when they are wanting to buy a home they will receive the equivalent of £25k (whatever that’s worth with inflation etc). If granny intends helping them, let them know that, so there’s no ill feeling. There’s only so much crystal ball gazing that you can do. Maybe your son needs to help her sort out a will whilst she is competent and in good health.

Surely it would br CGT, not inheritance tax

The younger three are too young to be given money yet. She may decide to give them some when they are older if she’s still around. Whatever happens it is not a lot to do with you. I hope the older two have shown their gratitude for such a generous gift.

No inheritance tax is payable on gifts given within 7 years of death. However there is a nil rate band of £325 000 so the £50 000 would be covered by this.