Clip-on tie at secondary school

[LongStoryLong]

Hi all, my first time in AIBU 😬 so you know, have at it!

My thing is this: my DC is going into Y7 at a large comprehensive secondary school in our town. It’s a grammar area, so all the children took the 11+ and most will have failed it, which is why they’re not going to the grammar school down the road (I think this is important context).

We went uniform shopping the other day, and I was dismayed to find that it’s ONLY possible to buy a clip-on tie for this school- real ties are not made.

AIBU on several counts really:

1. how common is this? Does anyone else have secondary DC at a school where ONLY clip-on ties are available?

2. I find this demeaning- like they’re saying to the kids, you didn’t make the grade, here, have this baby tie. Is that my prejudice talking?

3. I don’t know how it works in the town, but I worry that this will be used as a way of othering our kids by the grammar kids. Sure, it’s mean, but it’s a physical manifestation of their otherness, and I don’t see why that’s desirable.

FYI, we’ll be new to the school, so I’m not going to kick up a fuss (yet?!) but I just want others’ views so I can temper my own really.

Thank you all!

I think you really need to get a grip.

Even the police only issue clip on ties - for safety.

Unclench.

Almost all secondary schools I know have clip on or velcro ties.
No one cares or even gives it a second thought.

Lots of schools have clip on ties to prevent stupid kipper ties, students using it as an excuse to change slowly after PE and to prevent students pulling other peoples ties tight to strangle them. They also make life much easier for children with dexterity and coordination difficulties.

I can't imagine kids being picked on because of clip on ties.

Clip on ties presumably are easy to put on and harder to look slovenly, helping them to look smart.

I think you are overthinking.

Yep, common here too. Safety they said and ensure all ties were same length.

See this is really interesting, I had no idea they were so common.

p.s. ref children with coordination difficulties, of course clip-on ties should be an option. I’m just amazed they’re the only option.

It’s so they don’t get strangled. Same as police officers. My dc have real ties but that’s unusual.

What is ‘othering?’

I don’t know how it works in the town, but I worry that this will be used as a way of othering our kids by the grammar kids. Sure, it’s mean, but it’s a physical manifestation of their otherness, and I don’t see why that’s desirable

They'd have a different tie on either way, due to being at different schools so I'm not sure why it being clip on is an issue, is it really that obvious when looking at someone wearing it that it's clip on?

It’s so they can’t strangle each other.

Seriously - it’s a bit rubbish not to allow them proper ties . But maybe there are good reasons , some struggled maybe there was a worry about violence .

I have never seen a clip on tie for schools in my area.

I had a clip on school tie and that was 30 years ago. Safety first and all that.

Can’t you? Gosh, I can.

YABU.

Clip on ties are common in many professions.

They also are better to make sure the shirts are done up properly!

Personally I'd do away with shirts, ties and blazers in all school as they don't improve learning at all.

Says more about you that you can see kids being picked on for something that is perfectly normal.

As long as they all wear clip ons this is a non issue.

My DC's secondary in an 11plus area only has clip on ties, they are great and all look really smart. Never been an issue.

A complete non issue, get a grip. Clip ons are easier and safer. My DC go to two different comps. The suburban one that is seen as ‘better’ has clip on, the up and coming inner city comp has traditional ties. The girls grammars don’t wear ties at all.

To all the people talking about strangulation, yeah, I have a real problem this this! I don’t feel great about sending my DC into an environment every day where special measures have to be in place to stop them strangling each other. Do I just have to suck that up?

Teach your kid to put on a real tie and be thank full they have clip on ties at school. I didn't know either but makes sense to have clip on.

Ours is the same.

I just but them from amazon in the traditional style.

Because everytime the clip ons go in the dryer the clips come off

So children with coordination difficulties should have something different to the rest of the school?

You don’t think this would cause more picking on?

It's only a problem when adults make it one

https://www.otheringandbelonging.org/the-problem-of-othering/

@LongStoryLong - so you are happy to other children with coordination issues but not your own?

as PPs have said, a total non issue.