To find this apology an absolute cheek

[Crabsinthesea]

Yesterday I heard my two friends making fun of my weight behind my back in a restaurant whilst I went to the toilet. I confronted them and they just said it was banter and I need to take a joke. I said I wasn’t happy and then there was an atmosphere until we went home shortly after. Then today I received this text.

So she’s blaming me for being sensitive and telling me to move on! What a cheek! A complete non apology and I’m even more fuming!

Banter: friendly remarks and jokes!
https://www.oxfordlearnersdictionaries.com/definition/american_english/banter_1#:~:text=%2Fˈbænt%C9%99r%2F,exchanging%20banter%20with%20the%20customers.
you can send her the link.

If you couldn’t say something to someone’s face - it isn’t banter. If someone is upset by the comment it isn’t banter.

A joke and banter is laughing with someone not about someone.

How ugly and nasty that non apology is.

Be glad you now know exactly who they are.

She does sound genuinely sorry. I'd be inclined to let it go once.

Banter is when the subject of said banter is there and can fully participate. Being insulting is saying something behind your back assuming you can’t hear the rude comment.

If they truly were good friends and knew you were somewhat sensitive about your weight, why would they do that.

Drop them like a hot potato. You can do better.

Such a back handed 'apology'. You deserve better friends OP.

What disgusting ‘friends’….you are better off without them in your life.

I come from a toxic family environment and I am currently low or no contact. This is the sort of thing I had said to me thousands of times as I’m too ‘sensitive’…..could be about any of a hundred topics but always blaming me and never actually apologising. So I know how hurtful it is x

"It was only banter" is the excuse that children use when they're made to explain any rude / nasty comments that they may have made to others, which actually constitutes bullying.

You are better off without these "friends", OP.

Blaming you for your reaction to their abuse is Narc behaviour
Block do not reply

Bithcing behind someone’s back is bitching behind their back. OP told them she was unhappy and they were dicks about it.

Theres no nuance here, her ‘friends’ are not decent people.

Ditch them OP you’re better off without them.

I think you must have read a different apology to everyone else on this thread.
It was a complete non-apology, with a bit of added victim blaming thrown in.

If you really feel that the bitchy "friend" is genuinely sorry, that's probably because you're a very nice person yourself and wouldn't treat your own friends so badly.
Just be careful that others don't take advantage of your trusting nature.

Rather have no friends than ones like those

It was only a joke is said by every bully everywhere

That’s actually shocking. It’s not a matter of you being sensitive, it’s a matter of them being dicks!

'Sorry you're offended' is NOT an apology.

She's not sorry at all and is blaming you.

Hi I once went on a girls night out, went the toilet to find a very close friend and her friend in the toilet taking the mick out of me my makeup my dress everything and even said I stink needless to say I walked out they all had me minding thier bags I left all their bags and walked out and I never spoke to her again ever I cut her off completely cut them off !

You banter with each other you don’t banter with someone who you think is not there, that’s just slagging off or taking the piss out of them which is unkind!
That apology isn’t even an apology

What did you hear them say?

@Jennyjen92 good for you!

I'd be telling them to fuck right off.

I’d be so hurt. Sending love. You are better than them. I’d be mortified and apologise profusely if I was caught being horrible. You are not over sensitive to try and belittle you says a LOT about their insecurities and ugly personalities.

Banter is mutual, back and forth. Not behind your back twisting the knife in.
pas others have said, they are not your friends. Back away and surround yourself with people that deserve your time. Life is too short to spend it around witches like that.
She couldn’t even be arsed to actually apologise, she turned it around and took aim at you again instead

More offensive non apology than original insult.

Thats not an apology. No we cannot just agree to leave it. I think you've made it perfectly clear what you think if me.

Some people are just irredeemable thick.

I would reply that they had got the wrong word- substitute "Banter" for bitchiness. You need nicer friends.

"hi friend..... Maybe you could explain the banter? , then we can all get what so funny. I've clearly missed the amusing part
Thx babes
( 🤬🤢 )
Your friends are not your friends you deserve to be treated better x