With a seven month old you are still in the thick of it. It will be a more heightened time emotionally due to lack of sleep and still lots of hormones flying about. It’s all new and can be overwhelming.
Feelings of isolation as a new mum are really common, and you are right; it’s not that easy making mum friends. At least not right away.
My advice is to go to as many groups as you can manage. Often the local church ones are cheapest and offer a good support network.
It will feel a bit miserable for the first few months but this time next year you will know everybody and everyone will know you. You will be surprised one day that the mothers you felt were ‘hip’ and standoffish will suddenly open up and chat to you because actually, deep down, they all feel the same way you do. Even the ones with multiple kids.
This doesn’t mean that you have to spend all your time chatting about babies and milestones, you can have the type of convos you want with your old friends.
Once you have built up a new network and a routine check back in with how you are feeling about your friends.
I also think that it’s perfectly acceptable to reach out to a few of your closer friends and say actually I’m struggling, being a mum is more isolating than I thought.
Maybe they just don’t realise how you feel (especially if you normally open the convo with something jovial)
Maybe they have tough stuff going on too. Things get a lot more challenging as we get older and have more responsibilities.
The only other thing I’d say is it could be to do with you not being on social media. Rightly or wrongly, in the social media age, I find it much harder to keep up with and connect with friends that don’t use it anymore. When you see someone’s updates it reminds you ‘oh I need to message so and so’ or often sparks a conversation.
Also, if there is a Family Hub near you (formerly Sure Start) they are really good at giving extra support to parents and connecting you up with support/other parents in similar circumstances.