Over heard DH on the phone

[Misschananderlerbongg]

I really am genuinely wondering if I’m being unreasonable.

Just overheard DH on the phone and it was clear at the other end his friend was talking about the fact his wife had just had a boob job. They’re not close friends.

DH then said ‘I can only dream, that would be amazing’.

Then ‘every Man I know that paid for it had said it was a great investment, money well spent, no one has regretted it’. He’s brought this up with me before.

Then ‘oh I know it’s a no go here, she wouldn’t go for it’ in a very sad voice.

‘It needs to be initiated by the woman, I can’t bring it up’. Then what a lucky guy you are type chat.

This has made me very upset for a few reasons:

1. I have small boobs, but have breast fed 2 kids and think they’re in pretty good shape
2. it’s major surgery and he’s seen me go through major medically required surgery
3. HE has put on weight, I have not and I never comment on it and wouldn’t dream or commenting on it
4. He never compliments me or makes me feel sexy, and now I know he doesn’t like my boobs.

But I’m tired and emotional and keen to understand if I’m in the wrong? It just feels like a betrayal to talk about my body like this 😔

My respect for him would evaporate and with it any sexual attraction for him.

A man who thinks surgically altering his wife is a good investment. 🤢🙄
What about loving your wife and her body being the physical presence of a person he loves, being grateful if it is healthy and brings her joy, though dance or running or cuddling, or any number of ways a body can give you a fun life... if sensory pleasure can be enjoyed through it, and being grateful that he can be part of that.

What. A. Dick.

Why don't you book him in for a consultation for a liposuction, penis extension and ball wax? At the very least apply for all the brochures in his name. How dare he wish you to have surgery. Absolutely no need for you to feel self conscious. Just get angry. There is nothing wrong with you!

OP, honestly, he really is the most awful moron.
Has he no shame at all?
I would be mortified to find I was married to such a sleaze.
Forget about your boob's....which sound great by the way....and only nourished his two children....prick!

I think this is the moment you wake up to the fact that he actually isn't good enough for YOU.

I would have the Ick and I wouldn't so much as make him a cup of tea.
I would be so busy getting myself organised.
Don't hesitate to share what you heard him say. I would shame him and dump his ass.

This is all on him. What a moron.
Is he 12...... salivating over a boob job🤢🤮

As someone who is saving up for my own boob job, where are all these men who are happy to ‘invest’ in their wives surgery! Can his friend have a word with my DH!

Seriously though, what a total shitbag to have that conversation when you were in the house and there was a chance you could hear, that shows a massive lack of respect and consideration. We’ve all have chats with our best friends where we’ve said less than complimentary things about our partners, but I would never, ever do it with him in the house - it wouldn’t seem right, even if they were in the other room.

Terrible shithousery from him. And as for regretting it, those thousands with the PIP implants fitted well into the 2000s definitely do regret it now they're getting carved up to have them removed.

Why is it always the fat bastards that run their mouths like this? You deserve and could do so much better.

This is so wrong. How did the world become like this?

Everyone's body is how it is. If you don't like someone else's body, don't form a close relationship with them. If you do like their body, and who they are, form a close relationship, love how they change as you age together. That is NORMAL.

I'm older than most of the people posting here and I can see how fucked up this is. When I was a young woman these buy-it-off-the-shelf bodily modifications were extremely rare amongst us plebs.

Now it's come for all of us, because we are numerous and a lucrative market. You are being preyed on by big medicine. If I were a young woman now, my absolute deal breaker would be:

1. a man who watched (modern) porn which leads into the idea of body modification.
2. a man who thought body modification (other than a tattoo) was acceptable.

Back in the 1980s when I was a young woman, the world was pretty horrific for women. But now without a doubt it's much worse.

You do! I hope he steps up.

I am also old and agree with you @shoutingoutloud.

Oh and OP what happens when your "incredible body" goes the way of all bodies in your 40s or 50s?

Ask him when he’s booked in for a penis enlargement as you are longing for some girth.

tell him to get penis enlargement

Does he want a human partner or a Stepford Wife? I'm sorry, that's a sickening thing to have heard. What your boobs are like are irrelevant really.

Thanks so much to each and every one of you who has posted, it’s really helping.

He just came to apologise again and I remembered years ago he asked me if I wanted to get a boob job, he’d pay… he admitted that was a terrible thing to say. I’m no further forward though, still angry and no amount of apologising is changing that.

Oh fuxk off

I know others may disagree but i would personally tell him that he should get a penis enlargement and some other major surgery that's the equivalent of a boob job. i just feel he deserves a taste of his own medicine. you deserve better. please remember that

I wonder if he planned for you to overhear so that in his mind you would think 'Oh no! He's going to leave me unless I have a boob job!'

Don't swear at someone while pretending the actual word "fuck" is beyond your delicate sensibilities.

Horrible man not a nice thing to hear do not let him know you have heard his conversation. Get revenge by knocking his confidence because he must think he is perfect. Stock up on some low calorie food items and tell him they are for him bring up in conversation where the nearest slimming world meetings are and you know someone that had good results. If he gets offended tell him you love him but you do not like his man boobs.

Neither do trolls. Bore off will you.

This. “An investment” ?? This is completely objectifying women. Horrible. Tell him he needs a penis enlargement because your boobs shrink in revulsion at the sight of him, and his increased girth just makes his knob look smaller. Say you feel it would be “an investment “ .

@Misschananderlerbongg Then ‘every Man I know that paid for it had said it was a great investment, money well spent, no one has regretted it’. He’s brought this up with me before.

Am I the only person who caught this bit?

Why would a man have breast implants?

@shoutingoutloud a man who thought body modification (other than a tattoo) was acceptable.

Why is one type of body modification acceptable, but not the other?

Is just because a tattoo is the only form of body modification that you personally like?

Ah interesting that you're both late 30s, as am I...

Yeah when we were teenagers huge boobs were in, but now everyone lusts over small boobs. Women have tiny, barely there boob jobs, if they have them at all - and loads have reductions.

His tastes are definitely old fashioned. Get yourself a younger man OP! 😉

A tattoo is a very minor form of body modification. It has been around for thousands of years.

I don't have a tattoo or want one, but it is essentially writing on the body, not reforming the body.

I'm sorry that I have to explain this to you.