To ask if this would offend you?

[CobaltQueen]

Telling someone they have a strong accent and asking where they are from. Turns out they have always lived in this area and looked really embarrassed when I asked. Was I rude?

Yes it's rude

Yes.

Yes

Yes, very rude

Why is it rude to acknowledge difference in accent?

I'm really amazed that you have to ask. Maybe you're not British? if you are, did you get taught 'manners' as a kid?

If you couldn’t understand them then you can’t help that. I once worked with an older man from the local area and I could not understand a single word that came out of his mouth. Some people are just hard to understand and maybe don’t pronounce things properly or talk very quickly. Could also be a speech disorder or something.

How should I have asked then? I've been wondering for a while as her voice sounds so unlike anyone from the local area. I was just trying to make conversation

A bit dim, maybe. Or not local yourself?

DH has a very strong accent and people often ask where he's from. It's clearly not from round here. He's not offended, but it would be weird to ask someone who has lived here all their days.

How long have you lived there? Long enough to know the accent?

Not that I can't understand her, have just never heard the accent and was curious.

I think that is quite rude (although I appreciate not intended to be). People can feel judged based on their accent, and there is a lot of really unfair accent prejudice about. Saying someone has a ‘strong’ accent can sound perjorative too.

It’s not quite the same situation but I now live in a part of the UK with a very different accent to that which I grew up with. Occasionally people comment on it and it always makes me feel self-conscious - like I’m being marked as an outsider.

It’s not the most offensive thing anyone has ever done so don’t dwell on it or beat yourself up, but in future it’s something I would avoid commenting on.

It isn't, but 'Telling someone they have a strong accent and asking where they are from.' is.

Yes it is rude.

Because in Britain accent = class and class differences are very tricky etiquette wise. I've been told I sound 'posh'. I tend to avoid those people afterwards.

Now who's being rude? Deliberately, in your case, it would seem.

I was sure she would tell me she was from another country and then a conversation would develop. Very shocked she's raised and born here although I didn't say that.

Yeah rude

Its the "strong accent" that is the rude bit

Maybe you're not British? if you are, did you get taught 'manners' as a kid?

😂

I think the elephant in the room is, was she white?

It was just a mistake on your part, but it was probably a bit embarrassing for her.

I wouldn't personally find it rude, more intriguing. I've been asked before if I'm from my area and it just amused me.

I’m English and live in Scotland. I’m forever getting asked, but usually it’s “That’s not a Fife accent!” It could be offensive (some Scot’s not keen on the English, some not keen on Fifers from the next village!). I don’t take offence, but I suspect it’s sometimes intended to be given.

Yes, she is white. I can't place the accent. Maybe northern but also sounds kiwi. As I said, just really shocked she said she was born in the area we live.