Absolutely fuming with H for commenting on DD's eyes

[fumingh]

DD 4 has deep tear troughs. She just does.

So does my H ! She has it from him. I have asked the doc about it, nothing aside from making sure she's hydrated helps apparently.

In any case, he's fucking convinced it's because I don't moisturise her under eye area as much as I should.

I do put cream on her once a day, sometimes at bed time too. But he's never there to see it.

He constantly goes on about it. Not in an obvious way in front of her, but he'll make sure I know what he means. Like saying stuff like ' did you put cream on ? ' whenever he comes home from work and sees her. He says, you need to put cream on. Again, DD doesn't know he means that or her. But it really annoys me because he just keeps saying it.

First of all, I do it. Second of all, it doesn't make any difference, it's just her face- so why does he need to keep going on about it ?

I blew up tonight. I think it's a really shit thing to keep pointing out and it makes me really angry.

I don’t think this is an issue with tear troughs or moisturising. It’s a DH issue and it will get worse.

I’ve just Googled what tear troughs are. No 4 year old on the planet needs their eyes moisturised. Ridiculous.

This.

I didn't even know what deep tear troughs are. It's a non-issue. It doesn't need cream it's just facial structure. He might think he is speaking in code but Dd probably understands or will soon. You need to have a sit and talk. Let him know he needs to stop this or DD will have image issues

I'm white and my DCs get cream on their faces, what are you supposed to do if they've got dry skin? Nothing fancy, just wash face and a squirt of whatever's on offer after toothbrushing. I covered it with Vaseline as a barrier when teething aswell. DCs very frequently have eczema or other irritations, it's not uncommon in any race.

Wtf are deep tear troughs and how is moisturizer going to fix that though? Your husband is weird.

OP, of course you are correct.
Your husband is a moron and dangerous.
E45 is a great all over moisturiser or Elave. After a bath I would always moisturise damp skin lightly and my children have beautiful skin.

@fumingh I know you said you weren't coming back, but if you do, check out allergy shiners.

If, by tear troughs, you mean dark circles under and around the eyes, take a quick look to see if this describes them

No wonder so many kids walk around with sore skin especially in the winter! I don't understand why you wouldn't at least moisturise your kids skin once a week especially with UK weather

Good on you.
Otherwise, she is healthy and fine. it is all that it matters.

She's 4, she does not need under eye cream or any cream on her face for that matter 🙈

It's genetic and there is nothing moisturiser will do. The only thing that's fixed mine is tear trough filler and hydroquinone cream which is a skin bleaching agent only available on prescription.

However, I would only ever moisturise my child when they had eczema or particularly dry skin. Their skin is perfectly soft without it usually.

Weird- the whole thread! I dread to think what you would be like if you were dealing with an illness or disability.

There is nothing to “fix” though us there?

You are so dumb. Honestly. Along with many others on this post.
Is whether she should moisturise her child’s face really what you read to be the issue in the post?

If she has eczema she may. Which the poster states she does.

Well done.

Was it sunny by chance when you went wild camping? UV treatment lamps are actually a treatment for eczema - the sun's light is great for it too (but obviously also causes skin damage)

Cream could be full of chemicals. Keep it away from her eyes and see a GP or optician.

Sounds like that he isn’t happy with u, as nothing I do is right, think about whether it’s a relationship u r happy to have.

you are changing your mind as to why you are moisturising her face, is it dry skin or is it eczema?

and surely when a Dr says ' keep hydrated ' s/he means make sure the child drinks enough liquids in a day ?

maybe take the child's father along to the Dr and the Dr can explain what is on your child's face and where it has come from - that should shut him up then.

Well this is what I’m thinking. OP is doing nothing wrong and it’s all I ever known to be honest.

As black people we dare not leave the house without slathering ourselves in some sort of moisturiser/cream or we would literally look dry, dusty/ashy, it’s simply unheard of to NOT moisturise in the black community and that’s from the day we enter the world, and so far so good it’s not done any harm to our skin ( if anything it’s the opposite)

I remember when my sons were born and my mum came to the house with her Nigerian grandmother kit of Shea butter and god knows what other oils.. kid was literally greased up like a basted turkey but thankfully that only lasted a week then I was left to get on with my own “skincare regimen “ for them 😅

Facial difference

If he is never around when she is awake then how is he seeing them.
Just say ‘that’s your job now’ every time and don’t do it anymore.

I don’t think you should be using any cream on her.

She's 4. She can take in more than he thinks. Slowly and surely she will become really insecure about her face if he doesn't sort himself out.

Because the dad has made it an issue

I don’t know anyone that puts moisturiser on children’s faces.

How would you know? Lol

Also do you not know any brown or black people?

If you do then you know people who moisturize their kids faces.