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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Dramatic response from sons GF

1000 replies

Chrisia · 28/06/2024 17:17

DS is 26, we live pretty close to him. This week he got the results or an exam he had sat for work, it is notoriously hard and he passed. Last night after work he went out with his colleagues to celebrate. Apparently he told his GF (doesn't live with her) that it wouldn't be a late one. The rest is what I've been told, but according to her she messaged him at midnight and told him to go home as she has work in the morning. He claims he didn't get this so went back to hers at 2am, waking her up. He then asked her to order food for him, she did but he was sick before it arrived so she told the delivery driver to eat it instead, he then apparently shouted at her for doing this.
Apparently he was sick on himself so she had to force him to shower.
This morning I got a call at 5.45am, from his GF, telling me she was bringing him to ours in a Taxi as "If he wanted to act like a teen he could come stay at home" and she had a workout class to go to. I asked why he couldn't just stay at hers and sleep it off while she was at work and she told me he had already been sick on the bedding, was being moany and she didn't want to leave him home alone.
DS came in, he was clearly in a state, so I got him to bed, he has been sick but not too bad. Also before she left she took his bank card out his pocket and said to me she would be using it for her taxi back (this girl has a trustfund and lives off her dad so this seems unfair!)
Now AIBU to think this a very dramatic response, no need to give the food away as he did want to eat it and she is meant to love him, could she really not have just let him sleep it off? DS is quite upset with her and I think he is right to be!

OP posts:
OrangeKettle · 28/06/2024 17:19

No, he has no right to be upset. He was a dick.

DanielGault · 28/06/2024 17:20

Sorry, but talk to your son?

rubyslippers · 28/06/2024 17:20

Your DS behaved disgustingly - waking her up and puking on himself and shouting at her
unless this is a reverse he needs to apologise to her

SpudleyLass · 28/06/2024 17:21

Reverse?

HarrietTheSpyglass · 28/06/2024 17:21

My ex turned up in a similar state one night (much earlier). Gave me the absolute fucking ick. Why the hell would she want to deal with a vomiting idiot at 2am? I’d have done the same!

rubyslippers · 28/06/2024 17:21

I really admire her for doing what she did
why should she deal with a pissed up / hungover man child

CouldIBeAnymoreOuting · 28/06/2024 17:21

Good on her. He should have gone back to his own house. She didn’t want him there and she told him that before he arrived.

MotherofChaosandDestruction · 28/06/2024 17:21

OP your DS behaved awfully and she did look after him last night (thankfully) but turning up at 2am when she told him she has work, demanding she get him food then puking all over her bedding and having to shower him? She isn't his mum and he was really disrespectful.

I think she's great for doing what she did! His actual mum can look after the manchild. Hooray for a woman having clear boundaries and ensuring unacceptable behaviour is addressed before they commit further.

Chrisia · 28/06/2024 17:21

DanielGault · 28/06/2024 17:20

Sorry, but talk to your son?

And say what? he drank a bit too much and maybe wasn't his best self, but surely dropping him at his mums is a bit excessive!

OP posts:
TheShellBeach · 28/06/2024 17:21

No, she did the right thing.
Why should she have to put up with clearing up sick all over the place?

YABU.

Wishihadanalgorithm · 28/06/2024 17:21

Nope he behaved badly.

She was good to bring him to yours because I imagine she was worried about him choking on his own vomit if left alone.

Wishimaywishimight · 28/06/2024 17:22

He sounds like an arse. I hope she dumps him.

LongLimbs · 28/06/2024 17:22

Yeah perhaps it was a bit OTT calling you at 5.45 but to be honest so do you to be so invested. He’s a 26 year old man not a 17 year old boy! He’s made a choice to be with her so he must know what she’s like. I can’t blame her for not wanting a vomiting man puking every where because he was acting like a teenager.

Other posters have made a good point, she was probably worried he’d choke so what was she supposed to do…..

Octavia64 · 28/06/2024 17:22

Yeah I wouldn't have wanted him either.

Quite apart from anything else if he's drink and being sick he might choke on his own vomit so he should be somewhere where there are other people.

Personally I'd dump him for this.

TobaccoFlower · 28/06/2024 17:22

Poor woman had work in the morning and got woken up at 2am and then had to deal with all the sick/delivery man etc.

heretodestroyyou · 28/06/2024 17:22

Your son was a twat, it happens. He needs to apologise and move on. If he's defensive it will piss her off more and you really don't need to get involved @Chrisia

She's done nothing wrong apart from make it clear what her boundaries are.

OrangeKettle · 28/06/2024 17:22

No wonder your son acts like that, if his mum thinks the sun shines out of his arse and he can do no wrong.

Youcantellalotofthingsabouttheflowers · 28/06/2024 17:23

She did well, I would have left him in the garden. He should be mortified behaving like that.

Projectme · 28/06/2024 17:23

Well done GF 👏. I fail to see why she should have to tolerate that behaviour?

AGodawfulsmallaffair · 28/06/2024 17:23

Good for her, he behaved like a dick.

Dominoeffecter · 28/06/2024 17:23

She was being kind imo

Girlputyourrecordson · 28/06/2024 17:23

YABU - I agree with everything you say the gf did tbh 🤷‍♀️

TheShellBeach · 28/06/2024 17:23

#teamgirlfriend

Gorgonemilezola · 28/06/2024 17:23

She appears to have good strong boundaries.

heretodestroyyou · 28/06/2024 17:23

For the record, I've been that drunk too but I own it if I've been a dick.

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