6 year child - stranger talking about her penis

[hermenmumster]

Trigger warning : sensitive topic around Gender Identity

I was at a work event (private garden - bring family along deal) and someone there is a transgender woman- she was tall, bearded ,hirsuite and wearing a dress and heels.
My daughter (6) was roaming around with the other kids and i think must have asked the lady why she was wearing a dress.
She explained that she ´was born a man with a willy , and is now a lady ’

Something jarred in me about a grown person talking about gentalia to a 6 year old child.
What does the mumsnet think?
AIBU to be annoyed?

What did you say to him?
What did you say to your daughter?

Yeah, that wouldn't sit right with me either!
Regardless of the trans subject, an adult whose a stranger shouldn't be talking about his genitals to a child!

Ew…. Uncomfortable. I would avoid further work do’s with the kids.

Is the transgender person someone you work with?
Use of the word Willy was unnecessary imo

It doesn't sound great - I wonder what your child asked to be given such an unnecessary response?

Yeah, I’m sure your daughter would understand the difference between man and woman and thus just saying ‘I was born a man and now I’m a woman’ would have been enough. No need to mention willy. I’d hope it just came out and that afterwards they also realised it was unnecessary but you never can tell!

But this never happens…..

Two wrongs don't make a right.

The transwoman had no need to talk to a 6 year old about penises.

The 6 year old should be told it's rude to ask such personal questions.

(I'm GC)

I dunno, how would you feel about a tall, bearded , hirsuite man in chinos and a shirt talking to her about his willy?

Why would your reactions be different?

In the interests of balance - did you actually hear the person say this or is this a 6yo adding their own flourish to ' I was born a boy & now I'm a lady'?

No, surely not.

The person could have simply said "I'm wearing a dress because I like dresses".
6 year olds don't need to know details (neither do adults to be honest).
Who was this person in relation to the event?
Work colleagues or family member?
If work colleague - tell them clearly NOT to ever talk to your child about that again.
If a work colleagues family member - the same thing but via your colleague.

OP, I wish you'd have contacted the police and reported this adult for talking about private parts to your child.

Oh FFS!

I’m not sure using the word Willy is a criminal offence. Might be morally wrong but I don’t think the police would be in a hurry to investigate this one.

I don't disagree that the transwoman was doing it for effect.

I wouldn't be saying to my child now she's a woman either seeing as that's an impossibility.

Me neither.

Not one person has said it's acceptable have they? But what do you expect the police to do?

Did you actually hear this man saying this? Only asking as obviously young children might relay things wrong.
Assuming the answer is yes, I would definitely look askance at an adult (of whichever sex and in any sort of clothes) using genitalia words to a child unless it made sense/was necessary in the context.

You really think the police are going to come and speak to this person? When they don’t have the resources to investigate when a real crime has happened?

Not unreasonable.

Its perfectly possible to explain why a dress was being worn without referring to a penis, especially to a 6 year old.