6 year child - stranger talking about her penis

[hermenmumster]

Trigger warning : sensitive topic around Gender Identity

I was at a work event (private garden - bring family along deal) and someone there is a transgender woman- she was tall, bearded ,hirsuite and wearing a dress and heels.
My daughter (6) was roaming around with the other kids and i think must have asked the lady why she was wearing a dress.
She explained that she ´was born a man with a willy , and is now a lady ’

Something jarred in me about a grown person talking about gentalia to a 6 year old child.
What does the mumsnet think?
AIBU to be annoyed?

No, that was fucking creepy.

I'm finding this hard to believe tbh.
An hirsute transwoman, clearly looking male, is wearing a dress and heels. Is this your colleague, your client? Do they dress that way at work? Have you always known them as trans?
Then your kid asked them why they were wearing a dress? Did you hear your kid asking this? Is that a polite thing to ask one of your mum's colleagues? Then they mentioned their 'willy'. Again, did you hear them saying this, and if so why not speak to them at the time?
It doesn't ring true on many levels.

Hear hear.

If it's a colleague, why are you not reporting it to work, especially if they work with the public? Inappropriate behaviour needs to be raised with them and it was in a work environment, so reporting this to your management is the obvious thing to do, surely?

Oh of course, because men in dresses sporting beards is ENTIRELY not happening in this day and age EYEROLL

She likely shouldn’t have done that. Without knowing her, hard to know if it was a brain fart moment as a kid hasn’t asked before, whether she has any experience of talking to kids or not etc.

I live in London, I have known a number of trans women, spend time with many with the LGBTQ+ circle, and have yet to meet anyone who has a beard AND says they are a transwoman. Every transwoman I know works as hard as possible to fit in. I have met plenty of men who like to wear dresses / skirts / womens clothes and have a beard, but none would claim to be transwomen.

So yeah, I can go just about anywhere with being "faced with these people" as described in the OP

Not at all surprised to see people focusing on ops 'rude' 6 year old child rather than the man talking about his dick.

Sorry to miss the point, but surely if you wish to trans gender to a woman, you would cut off your beard so you would look like a woman, or, or....you are literally just a man in a dress ? If he looked like a woman in his dress, he wouldn't have been questioned by a 6 year old. He hasn't actually changed anything except his clothes - this doth not a woman make

Why is this geezer calling himself a “trans woman” when he is a TRANSVESTITE.

Nowt wrong with the latter, obvs.

And he shouldn’t be talking about his cock with a young child (or anyone, unless they ask about it).

Rank, entitled, way out of line. I feel for you having to work with this guy.

@YouJustDoYou the whole thing sounds made up, or embellished. Sorry that's the way I look at it.

I Know!!!

There was one in my area last week telling stories to kids!! No thank you!!

If he said it with the intent of inducing the child to make a sexual communication in return, then it's illegal.

Did anyone actually say this person was transgender, or is that just your description OP? Sounds more like an old school transvestite to me, hormones would mean no beard surely, even if he hadn’t had full reassignment surgery. It’s all a bit Little Britain “I’m a laydee” isn’t it?

People can wear whatever clothes they like, but he definitely should not have been talking to your child about his dick. Let’s hope he doesn’t use women’s toilets either.

No nice ordinary bloke would talk about penises to kids

no nice ordinary woman would think it's ok for men to talk about penises to kids

no nice ordinary people would say it's rude for a child of 6 to question why a man is wearing a dress

I presume you also boycott pantomimes then?

That's so unnecessary - if the child had asked why a woman was wearing a dress, would she reply to say that she has a vagina? Highly doubtful.

I'm a transman with my own children, so I'm around other children quite often and sometimes kids have asked questions. My reply is always the same "What do you think? ...Oh, that's an interesting thought, you should see what your Mum/Dad/whoever is with them at the time thinks."

It's people like that who made me turn away from the trans community and continue my journey without their "support" because it's just getting worse.

As it was a works meeting, even if a social one. HR should be involved, I hope you reported it.
Unless people get challenged for marginal behaviour they will push to something more unsavoury next time.

This, with bells on

To all the posters who are saying a bearded man in a dress wouldn't call themselves a transwoman meet Alex

6 year olds aren't being rude by asking about things that stand out as not normal. They're inquisitive, not rude.

Seriously?

A man, with a beard, in a dress and you think a six year old is rude for being inquisitive?

Most adults are capable of understanding that inquisitive small children will ask questions that other adults know would be rude.

How does a parent prep a child not to ask such questions? The only way for children to learn that some questions are best left unasked is by speaking to them after they've already asked the question and telling them why it could be seen as rude.

Small children are generally not filled with malice, their questions are quite innocent, I can't see what's to be gained from berating them rather than educating them.

Sadly your link to Alex Drummond doesn't show on the app. He's a good looking bloke regardless of how he dresses. Boils my piss that he claims he's a woman. Expanding the definition of woman, my arse.

No that's completely unnecessary.

I have several trans friends (yes I'm aware I sound like a cliche! But my friends i completely see as women/men whatever they identify as) but I also have a SIL who is pushing it on my nieces (one is 16 and has decided she's a boy... I'm calling her she because she dresses like a girl and always has!) and the other wee one is only 7 and has already told me she may want to be a boy and mummy said she could get a boy's willy... just why would you say that??

@AndiOliversGlasses the man himself said he was born a boy with a Willy and now he's a lady.

What else could he mean?