DD6’s party, Jemima’s mother and the clownfairy part 2

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Hi all

After my last post here https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5097890-to-tell-a-mum-of-a-guest-that-she-cant-stay-at-dd6s-birthday-party?page=1

I thought some of you might be interested in an update.

The clown/fairy I had booked ghosted me when I tried to confirm!!!! so for a moment there I was panicking about having no entertainer and felt that the mumsnet curse of hoping that DD had a shitty party would come true!!!!! luckily though, I have found and booked a back up fairy. So that mitigates the clown phobia risk

9 guests have RSVPed if a total of 12 invites (I had guessed 15), 3 TBC. Of the 12, I know 6 mothers (most of them just to say hi to at school). 3 who have RSVPed I couldn’t pick out of a line up. So far no other parents have asked to stay. Or indeed asked for any other details (or an “plan”)about the party.

Forecast is for pissing rain on Sunday.

The last few pages of the thread took a weird turn while I was asleep and started talking about swimming parties and lifeguards. We do actually have a pool … (I know I sound like I’m trolling at this point.) There will not be a lifeguard on duty, but as it’s about 12 degrees here so I don’t think anyone will be getting in the unheated pool.

(Am WFH today because DS has a high fever and power-chucked in the hallway last night while I was making cupcakes at 10pm for the sodding school fundraiser. As DS coughed in my face while he spreadeagled across my bed, I did think wistfully of one poster on the last thread who thought I was probably a cashed up career woman who barely saw her kids.)

OFGS

The only things stressing her are the batshit comments!

"The only things stressing her are the batshit comments!"

I don't think even the batshit comments are stressing her. Rather it seems certain posters themselves are having the screaming abdabs at the mere thought of the OP's party.

I just finished reading the last few pages of the last thread all whilst it's absolutely pissing rain here (good old Scottish summer 🤣) glad you managed to get a replacement fairy. Ds is having a party soon and the venue lets parents stay but most leave and enjoy a couple of hours peace

Well you haven’t, babes, have you now. It’s just one person. Chill.

As the party DGSA can you advise OP on the best way to transport the kids vomit, pony poop and the chemicals from the none guarded pool? I work in the haz waste industry so we could maybe work in tandem on this project 🤔

Simple. As a bare minimum, OP should have a medical professional on standby that will deliver tetanus shots to each child as they arrive.
Said medical professional can then be on hand to deal with the plethora of emergencies that are certain to happen because there is only one adult and a clown/fairy there

Good idea and happy to collaborate. We will need material safety data sheets as a starting point.

Just volunteering my services as a Project Manager/ Event Organiser. Based on my last two projects, I can ensure this party is over budget, under specced, and delivered a minimum of 10 working days late.

Form an orderly queue to the left, please.

This is my line! I’ve said this so many times “sorry I’m at capacity for friends” 😂

<snort>

Exactly. According to you in NZ most parents will drop off (same as where I am in the UK!) so is it really likely 20 parents will want to stay?? It's one person!

You're hardly going to be expected to be best buddies due to spending a couple of hours together at a kids party!

I am screaming!!!!!

Ooh, you're good.

I'm still doing the meta analysis of 6 year old birthday parties, with a particular focus on mayhem and mishaps. I just need to narrow down my search parameters as I'm currently getting a lot of material on clown related tragedies.

Once I get the application for the research grant in and sort out the research assistants, I'm good to go. I should have the data analysed by October 2025.

which is worse bc I couldn’t just get on with party organising and leave her to other parents to chat - I’d have to entertain her (well, I know people will say I don’t HAVE to, but I would feel like I did. Rampant people pleasing and attention seeking tendencies!!!!)

I'm just wondering how the kids vomit and pony poop ended up in the pool. If there was a lifeguard on duty he/she could ensure the ponies formed an orderly queue for the pony portaloo.

Meanwhile I’m reverse judgey that people have unfenced swimming pools in the UK.

Mine pretty much have free reign in the pool now as both good swimmers and it’s in direct line of sight from the kitchen but trying to keep them alive as crawling babies would have been a nightmare if it was unfenced

I’m not sure how our resident project manager will feel about this. She is already scheduling the party to be delivered ten days late

The door to the pony portaloo was blocked by the some random woman who was just stood watching as OP struggled past carrying food, turns out the clown fairy is allergic to horse hair and had a sneezing fit which resulted in Tarquin and Jemima getting knocked into the unfenced pool. They’d just done a piñata filled with sweets, nails and safety pins so threw up and bled all over the pool. I think someone was handing out free tetanus jabs though so they should be fine after a bit of Savlon 👍🏻

Lol yes. My boyfriend is German and he cannot get used to the fact that my kids never want to wear shoes and would (and do sometimes when I can’t be bothered arguing) walk around anywhere in bare feet e.g. the supermarket. Don’t get him started on the wandering around with wet hair. 😂

The kids generally keep their shoes on at school now as they have a uniform but the amount of shoes lost at crèche was unreal - they just never keep them on, even in mid winter. Little hobos

A perverse part of me is hoping that there is some sort of Incident at the party. Not enough to spoil it for DD or so that anyone gets hurt, but enough for plot development for this thread and to give the naysayers some validation. I’m good like that. Or perhaps I have munchausen’s syndrome .

That's ok. We all know what 10 days late really means. I have until at least December 2025.

So a normal 6 year old party then.

Just wait until you're cleaning the vomit and pony poo out of the pool. You'll be sorry then.

I think we need to think bigger than a big standard 6 year old party… I wonder what we could do to liven it up a bit? Does anyone work in a firework factory? Could we perhaps get a hot air balloon for the kids to dangle out of? We’ve got until December 2025 so I think we could make something really great here if we all club together (with the Project Managers approval of course).