AIBU to think no one warns you life with teens is tiring

[Blendiful]

Lighthearted but..

You know when your kids are younger people warn you how tired you will be, but no one prepares you for being equally as shattered when they are teens!

In a perfect world I need to get up at about 6am to be able to go to the gym (something I enjoy for me), walk the dog, eat a decent breakfast.
Working full time now the kids are older. Throw into this endless tasks for school, washing, food shopping for the bottomless pits, trying to provide a decent diet 75% of the time. Ferrying to friends/work/college/partners houses/social events some of the time when they can't get themselves there or I'm feeling generous or transport/timings won't work x2 for the amount of teens.

Messages about things forgotten/asking for help/advice about various things. Trying to spend some time together, chasing up homework/course work etc.

Then ideally I need to be in bed by 9pm to get a decent nights sleep, but I have to partake in a fight for the bathroom (we only have 1!) and the teens don't go to bed until later than this! Add in toilet trips/sneaking downstairs, nighttime wandering from the eldest and it can often be 12 before I can drift off.

I am tired! I thought I would be in the stage of doing less and enjoying more now, but it doesnt seem on the horizon.

As I said, lighthearted. I love them and realise some of it I could just leave them to it, but they are both ND and so need that bit of extra support or things just don't get done/get missed or get worse.

Anyone else with teens in this stage and waiting for a good rest

I sympathise, but honestly people have been banging on about how much worse teens will be since DC were newborn. ‘Oh you think this is hard, just WAIT until they are teens’ at every. Single. Stage. I’m in the sweet spot right now with a 7 and 9 year old and life is busy but the kids are awesome, im just waiting for that dreaded teen period to come now…

I've got 4 kids. Last one now 17. I'm knackered. But then throw in some sen needs and loads of extra demands. Oof, as my girls say. Also I'm now older. As a mum to babies I had boundless energy...I'm now over 50 and creak when I get up, thank god I don't have to sit on the floor for the endless clothes and nappy charges of the 3 under 3 stage. 😁

First world problems.

OP so true. I love my teens and I'm baffled at how much they seem to gravitate to me. Advice about stuff I would never have DREAMED asking my parents about, plus general chitchat, showing me memes on their phones, wanted to be tested on their revision, then all the practical stuff! Lifts, washing, endless food shopping! I love it, I love them, but god it's exhausting! Especially as they nap in the evening then come and lay on my bed wide awake just as I go into my comatose end of the day let me just mindlessly scroll on my phone mode!

🙄

I would think parents worldwide all find teens exhausting.

You forgot the bit where night time tv is now taken over by teen’s choices- everyone is talking about Brigerton etc, I’m like ‘oh no, we’ll be watching the kids’ choice again!!!’ (Saying that my eldest has good comedy taste!!)

Nah.

Give me teens anyway over babies and tots and 7 year olds.

Teens are interesting and fun. And have growing independence. And empathy.

Babies and tots are boring.

Give them
Their own TV.

I think I blanked this out thinking but they will be so Much more independent! They aren't! Haha

Absolutely! Now one of mine is driving, which is a mixed blessing as he can share the taxi service but also I can't relax if I know he's out driving. Middle one is frequently out gallivanting around the village with friends and often not home until 11/12pm and again, I need to be around really rather than asleep in case I'm needed - he called me at 9:30pm the other night after I'd got into PJs to ask for a lift home for his friend who'd missed her bus (30 mins away and no taxis for 2 hours as we're rural, not that I'd be happy with a 16yo girl getting a taxi at midnight on a Friday night anyway).
The price I pay for being the parent who actually knows what they're all up to is that I'm the one called in a crisis!

It may just be that I'm nearly 40, but I swear I'm more tired now than when they were small!

Limited sympathy, in your example you still get 6 hours of uninterrupted sleep.
I will never forget the torture of 1-2hours at a time and years of up to 5 hours a night max. I was a walking zombie dealing with nappies, toilet training, tantrums, food EVERYWHERE every meal... nothing will ever be as hard as that.
Oh and the hormones. Physically recovering from pregnancy and labour. Trying and failing to breastfeed.

Either you had miracle babies who slept through or you have just forgotten how hard it is with young babies.

Just your first sentence about going to the gym...I mean, it was a good 3 years before I could go to the TOILET on my own, THAT was my "me time" 😄

I hate it when people sy teens are harder. Nope. I get to change my sanitary pads solo.

Oh I absolutely agree, it's definitely my favourite stage of parenting, but no less tiring, just in a different way.

I'm still relatively young as I started very early! So only in 30s however, I still find it rough if I spend too long on the floor with friends/family toddlers! Haha. I think thank goodness I started when I did, otherwise I'd have no hope. Lots of my friends are starting now, and I'm glad I'm on the other end but, still tired 🫠

Give them
Their own TV.
They have one with an x box but they still come down to us (which I’m secretly happy about!!!)

How old are your kids? Just out of interest!

It's lovely that they want to ask stuff and chat for sure. Mine too ask me all sorts I would never have discussed with my mum. I love that! But it just feels very constant. I think when they were little I worked part time. It was tough and it made sense with childcare/school runs etc, but I miss those 1.5 days when they were out and I had 'me time' I thought I'd get more now evenings and weekends so it'd be fine, but mostly they are around, and needy haha

Saw this today...

They sure are. I work with the age group too, so why I said lighthearted I love them! But I just wasn't prepared for it to still be so 'full on' for so long, independence seems a long way off!

13, 11 and 5. Maybe I'll think differently when they are older, but I doubt it. Baby years were just horrendous.

Goodness me. You could put this on 90% of posts on here. Pointless & embarrassing.

Yes.

Their non-Lycra jeans take up half the washing machine. They eat a dozen eggs in three days, Their extra curriculars finish at 9.30pm. Their homework is too hard to check. Their shoes cost a million pounds,

Yes, this is exactly it. They are out doing their own thing often, but I'm still 'needed' to collect/drop off, call in a crisis, and just cause I can't relax until I know they are in and safe. But curfews are later and I want them to have fun and be teens! But, I also want to sleep 😆

This is absolutely wonderful! How lovely that they are so close to you! I never had that from my mum so reading this has warmed my heart

The sleepless nights worrying when teens start going out to parties/clubbing is so hard. Much harder than the lack of sleep when they were young.