To ask if you could go back in time to change just one thing in your own life what would it be?

[alrightluv]

I don't mean historically as in kill a world leader etc. I mean one thing that would change yours or family/close friend's life.

Mine would be force my sister to get her pain looked at. She left it years popping pills and died of something that would probably have been prevented if she'd gone to the GP sooner. Although to be honest they were giving her strong pain relief. I'd have made her get exploratory tests. She died too young. I used to beg her to go. If I could go back I'd drag her there and be forceful at the appointment.

Is there anything you'd do?

I've made a lot of mistakes in my life I could choose to rectify if I could go back. But nothing that has caused harm.

I wouldn't have got married.

I would never have started drinking.

I would’ve left home and gone to uni when I was 18…. Instead I declined my offers and had a baby instead .

I am the same as @BigFatPuddingMonster , I wouldn't have got married. I suspect you will get a lot of this particular answer.

Wouldn't have got married!

I would have gone to work in Australia when I qualified as an accountant as I always wanted to do. Instead I lumbered myself with a mortgage and life took over.

I think that you are creating a very negative outlook on your life and it isn't a good thing to "look back at what you did wrong" or "what you would change" because you can't.

You can't change the past, you won't gain anything by looking back. You won't change nothing by looking back. You won't improve anything by looking back.

Nothing to be gained by being focussed on what's behind you. Look forward and see how you can change your future by steering your present.

I'm sorry op that's so hard. I'm my case I took a gamble marrying my ex h. Deep down I knew something wasn't right. He had an affair, turned abusive and my dd suffers from anxiety.

Moving hundreds of miles away from my home town was a huge mistake and has caused so much sadness for my family. I'd love to go back and change that decision.

I would never have agreed to meet my ex husband at Leeds Festival.

Never to have seen MN.

I would have done things differently in my marriage and parenting.

I would have bought 20 bitcoins for about £1500 like a friend did when they told me about them around 2013ish! I laughed and said "Well that'll be a waste of money..."

Worth over £1million now. Still kicking myself.

I'd have stayed at college, gone to Uni and moved away. Also I'd liked to have learned to use computers sooner; at school it just seemed to be boys who had that chance.

@toomuchfaff I don't think wanting my sister to still be alive is being negative. Marrying exdh etc I'd still do. We get on though. I made many errors that make me who I am. But her death was totally preventable imo.
I've lost a brother and parents. Lots of family members.

Yes it's interesting how many wouldn't marry. I got fantastic dcs from my first marriage. But he's not abusive or anything. Just wasn't right. It's sad so many regret but not surprising. You read and hear so much about awful men on here and in RL.

I would have told the love of my life how I felt about him, instead of blowing the whole thing.

@xILikeJamx ouch! So sorry you missed that chance.

Similar to you OP, I’d try to do everything in my power to prevent the death of a loved one. My friend took his own life unexpectedly, so I’d go back and try to talk to him about what was wrong/do anything I could to get him help before he reached the point of no return.

It might not change the outcome, but at least I would know that I tried everything possible to prevent it.

I wouldn't have got married, but then again that would mean I wouldn't have my boys.

But he thing I think about most (every day) is that I regret not completing my PGCE.

😔 Are they with someone now?

I'd have badgered my mother to send me to ballroom and Latin dance lessons really young.

I would have started saving earlier rather than having a 'lifestyle' through my 20s

Me too. I don’t know what the hell I was doing. I pushed him away for no reason.

I’d go to a different University. Everything in my life went downhill as a result of my choice. It’s one of those small flaps of a butterfly’s wings that cause huge earthquakes down the line.

@Remembering39862 that's awful. Suicide is the worst way to lose someone. I had a friend with pnd who admitted having bad thoughts. I begged her to come to me no matter what time of day if she felt suicidal. She did. Fell into my arms. She's still alive and doing well over 20 years later. We aren't in touch much.but she's ok.
You didn't know though. Some people are so good at hiding it. I'm so sorry.