to think friend should give me her Taylor Swift tickets?

[ticketproblems]

I am a huge fan and signed up to all the presale access codes for UK and close by European countries. The only one I got a code for was a nearby EU country. I felt this was fine as DH and I like to go there and it’s not far away. So I bought tickets, which were in the local language and I was in a panic, which happened to be the expensive, tier 1 tickets for standing right by the stage. I didn’t see an issue overall because I was excited to go.

With an access code you can purchase up to 4 tickets, I bought 2 as that’s all I needed. My best friend and her (then) boyfriend (he was a bigger fan, she likes Taylor but never been too into her) didn’t get tickets to the UK events they signed up to and asked to use my code to buy 2 more tickets, if any were available.

I managed to get them 2 tickets (after spending hours in the virtual queue for them) on VIP which were seated, they’re decent. All was fine, he paid. They then broke up and he let her keep the tickets (presumably because he broke up with her and it’s her friend’s account)

Now I am pregnant and will be in my third trimester, just able to fly still, when the concert comes. I have attempted to contact the event for months about accessibility and been thrown pillar to post, I hope to swap them for accessibility but time is running out. My friend is now bringing new boyfriend and has seated tickets. My friend is fit, healthy (recently ran the marathon) and has no issues with standing, albeit preference is seated.

AIBU to think that she should offer to swap my (better) tickets for hers? It will come down to whether or not I can go. I will not go if I’m standing, this would be idiotic for my health and baby’s. So far, it’s silence and she just said it’d be a shame if I had to miss it.

My reasoning is 1) she only got the tickets because of me and 2) she didn’t even pay for them, her ex did. I also wouldn’t think twice about doing this the other way round.

I can’t tell if I’m being an entitled brat or if it just seems unfair.

YABU- get over it, sell your tickets.
YANBU - a good friend would do this. Especially one who isn’t a big fan.

Have you actually asked her?

Have you actually asked?

Are you hinting and hoping she'll magically offer or have you asked her?

Yabvu
Once you have given a 'gift', you cannot dictate what the person does with it, nor should there be any obligation associated with it.
Ok, in the strictest sense of the word, you didn't give the tickets, and you helped purchase them on her behalf.
But you have made attending difficult for yourself, so that's on you.

so....have you actually asked her to swap?
Perhaps she thinks it would be incredibly cheeky to expect to swap your more expensive tickets for her tickets and assume you would just sell them (and probably make a fortune!), and that's why she hasn't suggested it - if you're the one wanting the favour its for you to ask, not just expect her to read your mind!

Just ask her if she’ll swap. She might say yes (I would for my friend in this situation).

YABU. You don't have any right to her tickets just because they were purchased with your code.
You either go using the tickets you've got or you don't go. That's the choice.

Hahahahahahahaha you’re ‘avin a larf!!!!

I admire your brazen cheek!
I’ve had lots of babies and stood. I’m sure you’ll manage!

I’ve mentioned it, yes, to deaf ears. She just said to contact accessibility.

Friend also would be very upset if I didn’t go as she is asking to share things such as accommodation etc. but she’d be fine on her own.

Her bf hates Taylor Swift but I suppose not relevant.

Mentioning it is not asking.

I hate it when people give 'hints'.

Just ask outright!

Mentioned is not the same as straight forward asking!

Well, technically, they’re in my name in my account, so I actually have full access to them and she isn’t sure who’s is whose. I just wouldn’t do that as it’d be a dick move.

I have to be there for her to access the tickets due to this. If I can’t go, she won’t be able to go. Transfer is unavailable in the country (we’ve been trying to figure this out)

For a 3 hour concert near the end of your 3rd trimester. In the summer. I doubt that.
op I don't think people realise what a big deal giving codes away was for TS. Definitely ask her.

Mentioning: “if I can’t figure this out we may need to swap what would you think?”
her: “try to contact them again”.

I think this is it.

I could have easily used that code to buy tickets and sell for amazing profit, but I didn’t, because I felt that was unfair to others.

Having a code was like a holy grail. I was doing a massive favour.

I don't think she's being unreasonable. It's a shame, but that was the choice you made when you gave your codes away. If she's willing to miss the whole thing rather than swap tickets, that's up to her. Having said that, I don't think she's said she won't swap tickets, just that until you've managed to contact accessibility, she doesn't want to change anything.

If she won't swap, sell all 4 and refund her the original cost price of her 2. She doesn't sound like a great friend, tbh.

"I'm struggling with this pregnancy and can't go to the concert and stand for hours. Contacting them has been fruitless.

We could swap tickets, or I'll have to sell all of them as you need me there to access yours. Which would you prefer?"

You need to ask her directly but also accept that she may say no. I understand what you're saying but I think you're being rather entitled.

Just be direct and explain you won’t be able to attend if you have to stand… you understand if not but would she be willing to trade her seated tickets for your standing so you can all go to the concert?

Exactly! You need to be crystal clear here. Frankly I would be very annoyed, who wouldn’t swap with a pregnant friend? She is still so Lucky she has tickets!

I’d actually have to refund her ex 😂

I just wouldn’t hesitate the other way round, even if I really didn’t want to stand. It’s more of a friendship AIBU than a moral or obligatory one. She is my best friend / maid of honour and I’m disappointed. I can’t be excited at all because I’m so worried I won’t be able to go.

We had a miscarriage before and so this baby is a long sought after blessing. I know it’s my fault for getting pregnant and not being able to stand but currently I have two seated tickets in my name meaning that Ticketmaster and the event won’t help me, because I can use those!

"Mate, I'm not able to sort this out through the venue, can we swap tickets so I can have your seats and you stand or should I just sell my tickets?"

But if the friend says no, none of them get to go!

"I have to be there for her to access the tickets due to this. If I can’t go, she won’t be able to go. Transfer is unavailable in the country (we’ve been trying to figure this out)"

Exactly, I’m not travelling to the country to show my ID and my phone and then say bye!