Can't help thinking King Charles is selfish

[Eieiom]

Standing back, looking at the Harry situation, I can't help thinking that Charles is the root of all the family toxicity.

He had an affair while married to Diana, which led to their divorce and much unhappiness on her side. After her early death, his children were obviously in a lot of pain. The remote parenting style of the RF probably did little to soften this.
He's managed to marry his affair partner and now he's cutting off one of his sons.
Harry just looks like a really hurt person acting out to me. In most families, they would just be tolerated and forgiven.
I think the RF look very cold.

The solution is for them all to step down. We've outgrown having a royal family

Nah, I'm not convinced by that. I had a lot of sympathy for Harry until the Oprah interview and the book. But you can't go slagging off your family for the money and expect anything other than being cut out.

What can KC do though ? Maybe on this occasion, there just was a clash of diaries - maybe the times that suited H didn’t suit KC. Maybe if H had stayed a day or too longer, a meet up might have been possible. None of us actually know exactly what has/is going on between them all.

People need to own their own choices, H&M have their own responsibility for their actions

The roots are far deeper than that. I personally think Charles is one of the victims of it all, not the root cause. He was forced to marry a virgin (subjected to virginity tests) for example. The woman he loved wasn’t a virgin!

Oh I don't know his son wrote a book slating his family I think that's enough to not want to see him.

A lot of men, and women , have affairs but their offspring don't feel the need to write a book about the intricacies of their family life .
Harry just comes across now as a mentally damaged winger .

I think Charles is showing more empathy than ever and seems to relish his new role .

To me it very much looks like he was pressured into marrying someone he didn't love. He was a victim in that marriage too. I think Harry's behaviour is more the result of the harsh treatment from the media than anything else. I don't think we should have a royal family, but given that we do I think we need to treat them better. For example, no woman who has just given birth should ever have to get dolled up and parade her new born in front of TV cameras.

Not exactly forced. He could have given up his 'royalty' and stood down from being in line for the throne. He chose royalty over love. Same with Princess Margaret.

From Harry's autobiography it did seem like they weren't a priority for example they got sent away with staff for holidays

Harry is totally in the wrong. He trashed his family on tv and in print. He told so many lies about them. I wouldn’t want anything to do with him.

Undoubtedly, Charles was a dick when he was younger but what's the point in banging on about it now? Charles and Diana were a terrible match. Neither party behaved favourably, not minimising the fact Charles was older and should have known better.

Diana died 27 years ago. Charles has been married to his "affair partner" for 19 years now. And Charles and Diana's "children" are aged 39 and 41.

At 39, Harry is an adult, a middle aged man. He's publicly betrayed his family. I don't blame Charles and William for being pissed off with him. Families have arguments and I'm sure Harry is justified in feeling the way he does about his family but he's out of order making it all so public - there was no need to write the book or do the interviews. I say all of that as someone who quite likes Harry, I think he did the right thing getting out of the royal family.

Do you feel the same about every day Joes who have written books about their traumatic childhoods? It’s a huge problem for middle class+ people/children to talk about the difficulties they faced growing up as opposed to those who lived in poverty, apparently having money and access to material things should make up for wrecked mental health and it’s ’embarrassing’ to talk about it. Children of more middle class families are still less likely to be believed about difficult home lives over those living in low class areas. It may anger some that Harry has spoken out despite having an extremely privileged life, but he’s representing a lot of those who grew up with everything yet nothing of true value.

I think King Charles tried his best, and keeping in mind that his own upbringing was not particularly close or affectionate. Before H&M were married, he covered for them several times when they did not show up to planned royal engagements or departed early. He also, I believe, tried his best to welcome Meghan into the family - he walked her part-way down the aisle at the wedding, if you recall.

But Harry has behaved in such an egregious way, with lurid and demonstrably inaccurate memoirs and "recollections" (which may vary), and sounding off about private things involving numerous friends and family, that he has made it very, very difficult for those who love him - and I believe he is loved by his father - to engage with him in a meaningful way. King Charles can keep reaching out to him, but it's down to Harry how he responds to that, and after all that has happened, it's impossible to know if that reaction is going to be affection and reconciliation one day, followed by accusations and anger the next.

Also, Harry's book deal was, I believe, for three books. So it's understandable that there may be some reticence from the family about providing fodder for the next two.

Oh but they're so young, with a beautiful young family. And radiantly youthful, like bambis frolicking in the garden of eden, their faces glowing in the dewy moistness of the new dawning day as they gaze rapturously into each other's eyes, embedded for all time in the greenness and freshness of their love.

They are Romeo and Juliet, Paris and Helen, Pongo and Perdita ... forever young and free. Mocketh not the lovers of the true Gaia Reborn.

The king also needs to own his.

To me he reads petty, vindictive, greedy and has zero leadership.

Not sure any of the members of this family can be judged by 'normal' standards really. Easy to say that Charles or Margaret could have chosen love rather than duty, but when it's all you've ever known not so easy to do.

I don't think there's any doubt that the institution has 'modernised' greatly and will continue to evolve, but it's still nowhere approaching normal.

Harry has proven himself completely untrustworthy, and the others need to limit their business being spread across the media. He's made his own bed.

I don’t really agree. You present it as a choice along the lines of shall I learn German or French - and nobody cares which one you pick.

choosing to abdicate would have been scandalous (worldwide, not just here), he would have had to abandon the duty he’d heen trained for his whole life… I don’t think it would have been a choice that he would have felt was genuinely open to him, without a lot of lifelong consequences.

For goodness sake - he was 30 something years of age.

Yes - a bad marriage etc.

In Charles own book he denounced his parents for their poor skills. Most of us try to not repeat the patterns of old.

He dived straight in to that same pool.

There is/was the concept of 'duty' though. There was horrible pressure on them despite their privileges. Gilded cage etc. It's no wonder they're all fucked up.

This. No adult society has a royal family.

You do realise who we would have ended up with as King if he had done that?

And the memories of Edward VIII’s abdication would have been fresh in the Queen’s mind. He probably didn’t want to put her through that again.

I don't really think any of us can say what should or shouldn't have been done. The monarchy has rules and mores that are alien to most of us and which are, for the most part, completely inflexible. And you must cast your mind back 40 odd years. A lot has changed since then but 40 years ago the monarchy and the aristocracy was much more of the old school than it is today.

Personally I think it's a great shame that Charles and Camilla didn't marry in the first place. It's clear they've loved each other deeply for a long time.

I think the roots go back either to Queen Victoria, or perhaps George V. Much as I wish the Duke of Sussex lived in the UK and was a working royal, who could champion military welfare.

No, they just have Trump instead...