Woman keeps shouting at us to stop playing football

[WinkyTinky]

I've just come in from about 10 minutes kick about with my DS12. He likes me to play football with him, either in the garden or out on the path that runs past our house, and if course I love to do this with him. There is a tarmac square play area adjacent to the path which is just the right size for kicking the ball about. Kids from the street have played there over the years, but most of them have grown up now so it's only me and my son who play there, maximum of half an hour on a Sunday. Our garden is soaking wet so the path is the best place to get out at the moment.

Anyway, an older lady lives down on the next street and her house looks into this path. Every time we play there she comes to her upstairs window and shouts "Hoi! Clear off!" within minutes of us starting to play. We are as quiet as possible, and quite honestly she could have to deal with a lot worse than this. Normally, if anyone complained, I would stop immediately and go somewhere else, but having spoken to other neighbours, she has done this to their kids going back 30 years. Their advice to me (who don't mind at all us playing) is to ignore her and carry on.

I would do this, although reluctantly as I am very much a people pleaser and hate the thought of upsetting or inconveniencing anyone, but my son is so upset about it he just says let's go in. It takes me some time to persuade him to go out at all now, he's so wary of her, and I'm really annoyed that she's spoiling our very small bit of fun and fresh air.

Are we in the wrong by playing here? Or is she out of order to shout at us every time? Just to point out, there are no "no ball game" signs around, and I have even checked with a local councillor that we are ok to play there. How do I deal with her? I obviously don't want to have a go at an old lady, but surely she can allow kids to play quietly for a short time?

@bluetopazlove
If he is getting all those activities would he not better reading comics while you are cooking ?

??????

What a weird thing to say. People can choose their own leisure activities.

Is there a limit on how many activities a kid can do?

When DD started school, there was an Outing to the swing park across the street. I volunteered to be an extra adult (for crossing the road etc). It was one of those no-school-budget things.

So 2pm on a weekday, 20-ish 5-year-olds supervised by 5 adults, in the swing park (ie just a small area with roundabout, slide, etc). Still got complaint from Grumpy Neighbour "do I have to suffer this all afternoon???".

Of course, at 10pm until 3am with swearing its not good. But some people are just determined to be miserable.

Leave the poor boy alone, he wants to play football with his mum nothing wrong with that.

fwiw op, we have a neighbour who moans and moans about the children using the grass, wants it to look nice, doesn’t think the children should use it, next breath he’s moaning that back in the day he used to play out all day , not on these phones things.

you’re not doing anything wrong, keep going!

Batshit comments on here.

I think @bluetopazlove is having us on 😅

@DrJoanAllenby

He's 12 and playing football with his mum! Why isn't he going out to meet his friends over the park for a game of football?

Don't know why you're always so goady and negative on the threads you post on.
Maybe you could find a different hobby ? x

Mother obviously trying to amuse him while cooking 🙄.

@WinkyTinky WinkyTinky
I think @bluetopazlove is having us on 😅

Hard to tell somtimes on AIBU!!! 😂

Oh, absolutely. Visit this woman mob handed, it's the normal thing to do.

For anyone struggling to picture it I'm imagining something like this (OP should provide a diagram really though)

Isn't that a car park?

I doubt she's 'trying to amuse him'. He's not a 3 year old that needs to be kept out of mischief.

They're just taking an opportunity and having fun together because they both enjoy it.

Fair enough. I just thought the context made it clear 'the path' meant the play area.

Cut out a red card and hold it up to her referee style.

Exactly!

Having neighbours means you will have noise

He's obviously getting too much exercise and needs to learn to be a couch potato more. Ban him from using the local play area - he might get too fit! 🤯

In the OP the play area was referred to as adjacent to the path so to me it sounded like they were two different things. I must confess it sounded odd to choose to play on the footpath instead of the play area.

I like how the lady shout "Hoi!". 😂

oh dear - this sounds truly traumatic

Up until the last year or so when he’s started spending more time in the house gaming, our attached next door neighbour’s youngest boy would often be out (afternoons and evenings) playing football on his own, kicking the ball against their garage door, over, and over, and over again…..

Was it annoying at times? Of course. But would my DH or I ever have hollered at him to stop? Absolutely not.

Fun sponges come in all shapes and sizes and it seems you and your lad have unfortunately encountered one in the wild. Next time she shouts, tell her you and your son are playing football together, getting some fresh air and exercise and doing nothing wrong so she needs to mind her own business.

She’s an adult. Why does what the kid wants trump her?

In what world do you live where kids don't have a right to play? Why does her obsession with no noise ever trump his right to half an hour of playtime? Or that of his mum, for that matter - who is also an adult?

We have a neighbour like this who obsesses about where people park, even though it makes no difference to him, as he has a double drive for his two cars and he always has plenty of space to get in and out of it. It's clearly his hobby to try to fall out with people by leaving notes on their legally, safely and not-in-anybody's-way parked cars and give them orders, making up ridiculous lies and inventing absurd projections. He wouldn't benefit in any way if people did 'obey' him - he must just like enemies.

It's just selfish, arrogant people who assume that their (sometimes random and silly) preferences should always take priority - and so anybody who disagrees with them is automatically in the wrong. She gets her wish 23 and a half hours a day and OP's DS gets his for half an hour - but she still feels entitled to demand her wishes 24/7.

I've seen a few complaints about noise recently and while I do like to be considerate no one has a right never to be disturbed.

One person mows their lawn and another fixes their car. Another has kids playing and laughing. We all must put up with those things (within reason) unless we can afford to build our own home in the middle of a 50 acre garden.

The woman who complained could have used that time to do some hoovering and probably not heard it at all.