I see a lot of myself in your post
When the childfree movement first rose online in the early-mid 2000s era I decided in my mid 20s to be childfree, due to many of the reasons you describe
At the time had a great career in media, love to unwind & sleep in, go out, travel, spend $ on myself & had had several bad relationships that put me off wanting to tie myself to a person forever
I had fellow career minded girlfriends who also shared this view & felt supported that I was not alone in my beliefs
When I saw other people's children I didn't coo over them or melt, so I believed this meant I was not maternal.
I read about that most men don't want kids anyway, they just do it to please their partner
I worried about the risk of a child with a disability & didn't want to ruin my life if they had autism or disabled.
Fast forward & my perspective has changed in recent times.
I let fear guide me & that is not a good place to make decisions from. The idea of that responsibility was overwhelming, so I interpreted it as a sign that motherhood was not right for me. Having spoken with other mothers, even the ones who always wanted motherhood can still feel overwhelming fear of this responsibility & impact on their lives.
I became burnt out in my exciting career as the young up & comers came onboard & grew tired of competing. My job gradually became less important to me & I craved more work life balance. But due to choosing not to have a partner or children, there was less opportunity for me to achieve that work life balance on a single income as I needed to solely support myself with no tax breaks to assist me.
I see now that my personality is suited to aspects of motherhood that I hadn't considered before, Eg: don't suffer from boredom. On weekends I love pottering around the home, making sure my home is in order so I feel organised, go for walks with the dogs, browsing supermarkets for the best deals etc. Many aspects of motherhood involve drudgery & dullness, but I actually tend to cope with those things well & lean into them.
I was so influenced by the childfree movement & all the forums that claim all parents secretly regret their children & parents have no time to be themselves & marriages fail after kids, etc.... then my brother & cousin had children, so I assumed they would experience this. However when I saw my nephews, I felt a strong sense of protection over them, as they were my family. I saw yes, sleep deprivation or dealing with a tantrum was unpleasant, but that they did not regret their children & love them deeply. That people enjoy spending time with their children & can look forward to coming home at the end of the day to them as well.
I realised at the end of the day, a career can be fulfilling but that ultimately your company does not care about you or will always give you the life meaning you crave. That many people work so they can support their family, which means the most to them. That unless you have a vocational calling like being a doctor & saving lives, that work can lose its meaning later in life.
Because at the time I was not looking for a family man, I entered into relationships with fun men who were not family minded & in some cases they were not always the people for building a long term happy life with. Whereas the mindset of a man who does want a family one day generally seemed to result in a better quality of man. I let many good men go because they wanted a family one day. I also found that childfree men are actually rare & that many men look forward to the idea of fatherhood one day too.
The girlfriends/colleagues who all claimed to be childfree mostly changed their minds & had families, moved away for work so lost touch etc - leaving me feeling more isolated & the social life that I loved was impacted. The single childfree woman is not someone that married people seem to enjoy hanging around, I was still wanting to go out & have fun, but they grew up, we grew apart. I put off several nice girlfriends who chose to have kids by talking about how wonderful my childfree life was & how great my life was, I was arrogant & unintentionally offensive. I understand why they phased me out.
Sadly I realised the flaws in my mindset too late & in hindsight I wish had not been sucked in by the childfree movement.
While fell pregnant with my boyfriend easily in Dec ago at 40, but sadly lost it as it is common at this age to miscarry. It has been hard to deal with & wish I'd had a family earlier in life when it would have been easier to fall pregnant.
While I had discounted young mothers in their 20s as lame & selling yourself short in life, I realised that having kids younger means you get that life back in your 40s. Whereas in your 40s you are calculating that you will be in your 60s with a teenager, which is not ideal to me.
While I struggle with ED, when I was pregnant I made sure to eat well - it actually helped me to make the better food choices & take care of myself.
I felt instinctively that if my baby was born healthy but suffered a terrible accident & became disabled during childhood that I would still love/care for them. So I shouldn't overwhelm myself with worry that they may be disabled from birth.
I was the first person to claim my dogs were my children & would die for them, but once I was pregnant my moods shifted. I started considering wild things, like actually keeping my dogs outside or not on the bed, so that there was no hair on the floor, slobber on baby or or risk of being tripped over by the dogs being underfoot.
One of my dog's constant barking suddenly became so infuriating in pregnancy due to hormones that I started to consider having to rehome her as she would wake the baby up - and I was the most vocal person that people who rehome their pets are scum of the earth! I realised that pets are not people & that I was using them as a bandaid for my maternal instincts.
Enough rambling, just wanted to share the flip side of the coin to you & give you a realistic idea of the struggles we can face if we do change your minds one day.