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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Partner turned off (My) wifi and upset my Son - AIBU

543 replies

candragonsbepurple · 21/03/2024 20:58

My partner is childless. I have two children (A son who is eleven and a daughter who is seven)

My ex husband moved to take care of his Dad six months ago but before that we had been divorced two years. Exes Dad has cancer and he's alone (Ex is an only child and his Mum died way before I met him) I'd have moved myself and my children to be nearer to ex so they could see each other but Ex was completely adamant they stay where they are for school and their friends.

One of the ways my children communicate with their Dad is through video games. I dont know how it works but they talk to each other while they play. They do this every sunday for a few hours before tea time. Sunday just gone my son wasn't well but really wanted to play games with his dad. I said that was okay and I'd save him some dinner (I made him some eggs and soldiers)

My partner cut the wifi when my son didn't come to the table. His reasoning was my son was being disobedient but I'd told him three times that DS wasn't feeling a hundred percent and I don't force my kids to eat big meals when they are unwell. My son was understandably distraught thinking his Dad had ended the game without saying goodbye and my partner kicked off.

He started ranting and raving how under HIS roof my son should have more respect. I reminded partner that we live in 2024, not 1924 and the house I owned was mine that my Mother left to me.

I ended up kicking my partner out - He went home in a huff and now I'm being put in the middle by partner's Mum saying that I should teach my children respect.

AIBU in thinking it's not my partner's place to parent my children - he's not a live-in boyfriend, we've been together ten months and that his Mum should keep her nose out

OP posts:
Toothbrushh · 21/03/2024 20:59

He’s a cock

whitebreadjamsandwich · 21/03/2024 21:00

Your (should be ex) boyfriend is a dick. Don't let him back in to your home - your kids are fine, your ex sounds like he is doing his best, and the only issue is him

MaloneMeadow · 21/03/2024 21:00

Get rid of him completely and go non contact. This is only the start of his controlling behaviour, it’s the tip of the iceberg

Luzina · 21/03/2024 21:00

You are definitely not BU. He sounds like an idiot. And ignore his mother why is she even speaking to you about it

Newbalancebeam · 21/03/2024 21:00

Fuckity bye to him. Sounds like a nasty cocklodger and you’re well rid! Well done on sticking up for your son.

readytoexplode24 · 21/03/2024 21:01

I wouldn't let him back not for a second. What a control freak.

Violettaa · 21/03/2024 21:01

This is why you don’t make your children live with someone you’ve been with for the blink of an eye.

StSwithinsDay · 21/03/2024 21:02

Only 10 months in and you can see the harm being done to your children.
Hopefully you will put your children first now and not have him back.

DrunkenElephant · 21/03/2024 21:02

What an absolute dickhead, how dare he do that to your child?

Do not take him back, and tell his mother to keep her nose out too.

chrisfromcardiff · 21/03/2024 21:02

candragonsbepurple · 21/03/2024 20:58

My partner is childless. I have two children (A son who is eleven and a daughter who is seven)

My ex husband moved to take care of his Dad six months ago but before that we had been divorced two years. Exes Dad has cancer and he's alone (Ex is an only child and his Mum died way before I met him) I'd have moved myself and my children to be nearer to ex so they could see each other but Ex was completely adamant they stay where they are for school and their friends.

One of the ways my children communicate with their Dad is through video games. I dont know how it works but they talk to each other while they play. They do this every sunday for a few hours before tea time. Sunday just gone my son wasn't well but really wanted to play games with his dad. I said that was okay and I'd save him some dinner (I made him some eggs and soldiers)

My partner cut the wifi when my son didn't come to the table. His reasoning was my son was being disobedient but I'd told him three times that DS wasn't feeling a hundred percent and I don't force my kids to eat big meals when they are unwell. My son was understandably distraught thinking his Dad had ended the game without saying goodbye and my partner kicked off.

He started ranting and raving how under HIS roof my son should have more respect. I reminded partner that we live in 2024, not 1924 and the house I owned was mine that my Mother left to me.

I ended up kicking my partner out - He went home in a huff and now I'm being put in the middle by partner's Mum saying that I should teach my children respect.

AIBU in thinking it's not my partner's place to parent my children - he's not a live-in boyfriend, we've been together ten months and that his Mum should keep her nose out

You mean your EX partner, right?

Saymyname28 · 21/03/2024 21:02

Fuck me . Sounds like you've had a lucky escape only wasting 10 months on this nob. Using "under my roof" is a dick move. Especially when it's not even his house 😂

FannyFifer · 21/03/2024 21:02

Never ever choose a man over the wellbeing of your children.
Make that the end of your relationship & thank your lucky stars you don't have children with him.

MonsteraMama · 21/03/2024 21:02

Ew, grown men who run straight to mummy when they don't get their own way should come with a warning label.

"Warning, may cause permanent vaginal closure"

Please dump this loser.

maudelovesharold · 21/03/2024 21:03

Another one! Why do men do this kind of shit? Congrats on getting rid. Don’t have him back.

gamerchick · 21/03/2024 21:03

He's not your partner OP, there is no future with this man. He's given a glimpse into the shit your kids will experience if you create a life with him.

Tell his mother she is welcome to keep him and to stay the fuck out of your inbox from now on.

CatherinedeBourgh · 21/03/2024 21:03

Even without anything else, any man declaring my house that he doesn't even live in HIS roof, would never be under that roof again.

cadburyegg · 21/03/2024 21:03

Get rid of him for good, block, delete

Iloveacurry · 21/03/2024 21:03

Dump him permanently.

misssunshine4040 · 21/03/2024 21:04

Don't take him back. He had no place getting involved at all.

What a nasty man!

Noicant · 21/03/2024 21:04

HIS house is it? Just get rid, he’s a waste of space. His mum just doesn’t want him back, her son sounds like an utter loser and she’s either a) trying to foist him off on you b) trying to make sure he’s taken care of the way she would. Honestly never ever let him back in.

Mum2jenny · 21/03/2024 21:04

Get rid of the fucker. He’s totally disrespectful to you and your children.

Pigeonqueen · 21/03/2024 21:04

He’s a nasty piece of work.

MCOut · 21/03/2024 21:04

OP you absolutely did the right thing. It is not for him to decide how you parent your child. He overstepped massively. I don’t even know where to begin with his mother.

Mumof2teens79 · 21/03/2024 21:04

Saymyname28 · 21/03/2024 21:02

Fuck me . Sounds like you've had a lucky escape only wasting 10 months on this nob. Using "under my roof" is a dick move. Especially when it's not even his house 😂

This!

cheesedome · 21/03/2024 21:05

Wtf is his mum getting involved for?! Pair of wankers

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