Partner turned off (My) wifi and upset my Son - AIBU

[candragonsbepurple]

My partner is childless. I have two children (A son who is eleven and a daughter who is seven)

My ex husband moved to take care of his Dad six months ago but before that we had been divorced two years. Exes Dad has cancer and he's alone (Ex is an only child and his Mum died way before I met him) I'd have moved myself and my children to be nearer to ex so they could see each other but Ex was completely adamant they stay where they are for school and their friends.

One of the ways my children communicate with their Dad is through video games. I dont know how it works but they talk to each other while they play. They do this every sunday for a few hours before tea time. Sunday just gone my son wasn't well but really wanted to play games with his dad. I said that was okay and I'd save him some dinner (I made him some eggs and soldiers)

My partner cut the wifi when my son didn't come to the table. His reasoning was my son was being disobedient but I'd told him three times that DS wasn't feeling a hundred percent and I don't force my kids to eat big meals when they are unwell. My son was understandably distraught thinking his Dad had ended the game without saying goodbye and my partner kicked off.

He started ranting and raving how under HIS roof my son should have more respect. I reminded partner that we live in 2024, not 1924 and the house I owned was mine that my Mother left to me.

I ended up kicking my partner out - He went home in a huff and now I'm being put in the middle by partner's Mum saying that I should teach my children respect.

AIBU in thinking it's not my partner's place to parent my children - he's not a live-in boyfriend, we've been together ten months and that his Mum should keep her nose out

Good on you for kicking him out! It’s so nice to see a parent putting their children before their partner because so many seem not to. You did exactly the right thing. He does not get to treat your children however he wants.

AIBU in thinking it's not my partner's place to parent my children - he's not a live-in boyfriend, we've been together ten months

I agree. I would stop referring to him as a partner. He's a boyfriend and that's ok, you don't have to big it up. 10 months isn't much time at all for the kids really.

Also this is why you shouldn’t be having men around your children. Sorry OP, I’m not putting the boot in here but he shouldn’t be anywhere near your kids at ten months.

This relationship is not going to work. Let him leave now!. Protect your children.

I hope his Mum turns his wifi off. I'm assuming he still lives at home with her?

End the relationship and then you don't have to deal with Mummy either.

🚩 🚩 🚩 Run for the hills OP and don’t look back - ten months in and he’s telling YOU how to parent YOUR children in YOUR home .. then runs crying to mummy … sling him in the bin before he does any more harm …

Never, EVER, put anyone before your children's emotional health, safety and happiness. You brought them into this world. Your partner needs to go, he's emotionally abusive.

At least he doesn't live with you, no need for him to come back.

"Please don't tell me how to parent Linda, I have spent 10 months with the result of yours and let me tell you, he needs a lot of work"

He should not be anywhere near you, your house or your child. He can go back to his mummy and you can parent yours. Just end it. No explanation needed.

THIS!

I read this with a sense of impending dread. But no. Well done OP. Well done. What a monsterous twat he is. Bye bye arsehole.

His mum also needs to butt out

Enough red flags for a fucking parade there...

HIS house?

Deciding to parent your child without prior discussion or agreement

Attempting to gain 'respect' by behaving like a teenager.

Getting his Mummy involved!

Fuckity bye indeed! If he's this much of an arsehole at 10 months, imagine how bad he'd be after a few years, or if you married him!

Get rid of him and his nasty mum. You can’t have a bully in your house. It’s not fair to your children.

Sometimes on MN I think the LTB responses are a bit full on / overreactions. But seriously? He sounds like a complete bellend.

You've only been together a few months, he doesn't even live with you and he's already behaving like this?

Imagine how much worse he will get as your relationship progresses!

The guy is a screaming red flag, dump his ass!

Well done on getting the bullying twat out. All you have to do now is not let him weasel himself back in.

😯?. Is this the partner?

Brilliant. You have to send this.

Yuck, keep him out.

Only thing you did wrong is wait too long. You should have kicked him out at the dinner table when he turned YOUR wifi off in YOUR home and tried to dictate his rules to YOUR child even after you explained what was happening.

Your poor son! I hope you've got rid of the dickhesd for good.

Op youre not in the middle... youre where your son is.. and your son did nothing wrong and any attack on him is an attack on you. You protect your children at all costs. Firstly (not that it matters) but your son wasn't being disobedient. You told him he could play games , he was spending time with his father in addition to this. Even if your partner was mad.. what the hell has it got to do with his mother ?? What a nasty nasty woman she sounds! Op please see the red flags and you really don't need mumset to tell you this. get rid now before he moves in or you have kids together and then you will really struggle to get him out your house if you wanted at a later date. Your son is your priority not a man! Don't accept mild apologies or it wony happen again. Ppl like this don't change. They just say the minimum to get past it all and then slowly the poor behaviour comes thru again.

He went crying to his Mummy because he thought you were nasty to him?

Yeah, I couldn't share a bed with that again, ever, even without the massive boundary-smashing and the tantrum and how he wants to be able to treat your kids.

That is so fucking great 😂