My ds dresses like he’s about to rob a shop on his escooter!

[PanadTe]

He DOESN’T own a scooter… just looks like he should

I posted this in teens without much response, so apologies for duplicate post.

When will he grow out of this?! AIBU to be a bit disappointed?

He’s 14, all clothes are JD brands mercier, hoodeich, zavetti. His recent purchase is a hip pack 🙄

I’m really not trying to be judgemental, esp to his face!… DH on the other hand just takes the piss, which I wish he wouldn’t do! But I know he’s trying to be someone he’s not… listening to travis scott and drill type shite music. We don’t live in a city or even a large town. No gangs round these parts

I hope it doesn’t stick!

Why has your 14 year old got an escooter - is he part of a drug distribution network?

He hasn’t! He just looks like he should

Ah right just leave him be then

This is my point though… he looks like he could be!

I think most 14 year olds are still navigating life rather than trying to be someone they're not.

And they don't always grow out of it I'm afraid.

Just last week we were having a photo taken on Mother's Day with my 30 year old DS and I told him to smile, and try to look less like a drug dealer 🤣

Lots of them got through this stage to fit in. Keep talking to him. My son thankfully didn’t go through it but with with my nephews it lasted til they were 15/16 ish when they realised they were more attractive to those they wanted to be, when they dressed better. 😅

As the saying goes, ‘this too shall pass.’

I get it, my 16 year old looks similar but it does seem very common.

at home he’s lovely, chatty,
smiley. Enjoys our company and will happily spend time with us. So I can only assume he is similar with friends. He has some lovely friends who I know from primary days, and some I’ve never met who he’s made since secondary school.

You just need to let this go, it’s not a biggie

Ah yes, I think it is a common look! I’m just trying to judge whether I’m just old. It’s such a shite look

I work with lads in PRUs who are involved with police in their local areas for fighting and drugs. They all wear the same brands.

I hate that he’s wearing similar and that the whole JD look is geared towards this.

Do you live in SE London by any chance? There is a definite look, and your description is spot on.
My youngest dresses like this, the older 2 have different styles, one skater style and the other just gym gear.
They find their own way and soon grow out of wanting to dress like everyone else, 14 is a tough age!

Rural Cumbria of all places!! 🙄

The skater look I can get on board with, it’s not an intimidating 1st impression. That’s my worry.

People must just look at him and think he’s a dick.

Don’t joke, county lines gets everywhere, innit, bruh?

Just roll with it honestly.

My 13 yr old DS went from my blonde, boden-wearing cherub to a spiky-haired football hooligan in a tracksuit overnight!!!

Pick your battles. Is he happy, have friends and loads of exercise??
He will grow out of it...

Yes, I know. It is very prevalent up here… rural tow s such as Kendal and Carnforth on the M6 drag to major cities.

I do worry.

Thank you!

I should think of the wins!…. He’s not in to football or watching sport at all! That’s my win 🤣

In all seriousness, don’t worry too much. It sounds like you have a good relationship with him, keep talking, have conversations about friends, relationships, school, sex, drugs, his future etc, be open, do things as a family, make home somewhere he wants to be, make sure he knows he can tell you anything, work at perfecting your ‘I’m not shocked face’. You’ll be fine.

Thank you! This is lovely advice. I do like to think we are doing these things and he does enjoy our company.

Its the new Punk/Emo/Goth thing. Teenagers who live nice houses with nice families pretending they are Roadmen. He will grow out of it in a few years.

This is sooo common for teenagers as they get influenced by music videos a lot. There is no harm in it at all as long as he’s not actually doing anything bad. It’s just fashion

What surprised me is that anyone would be remotely surprised.

Music these days is not all Ed Sheeran and Taylor Swift. Regular appearances in the top 10 on Spotify in the UK come from UK drill artists such as Russ Millions, Headie One, Tion Wayne etc. That’s saying nothing for Afrobeats, or mainstream rappers such as Dave / Central Cee. This music has basically become the pop music of today.

These guys have such heavy internet presence and the clothing they wear everywhere is exactly as you describe your son.

It’s not like 30 years ago when you got your clothing tribe from your surroundings or your peers

If he likes drill or trap he will be wanting Hoodrich, Trapstar etc, maybe Palm Angels. He will be using slang terms such as “bunda”, “mans”, “calm”, “bando” etc

So in short I don’t think this is some random thing and he’s cosplaying a county lines kid. It’s the visual idiom of today’s music. 🤷🏽‍♀️

Could be worse, my friend's 14 year old daughter turned up to lunch last week looking like someone swapped her head for a satsuma with eyelashes.

But of course you smile pleasantly and ask how they've been.

Ahhhh I remember the JD phase.

Bloody awful it was - my DS was 13 and the mates he had were undesireables.
It had an impact upon harmony at home and his behaviour at school.

2 years later he now buys from Bershka , and went into the city today and bought himself some loose leaf tea.
Hes been sat with a teapot supping his tea and watching TV .

It does pass 😊

Most people who like Travis Scott are in primary school. So not in a gang.
Kids in a gang would get laughed at for listening to that.
So yeah, he's probably fine. Giving a bit of Ali G west staines massive vibes. Would you rather he wore a pink dress?